Page 106 of Stay this Christmas
“I’d be gone all the time. It’d ruin my relationship with you and Grandpa.”
Her laughter didn’t sound very convinced. “Are you trying to sell this as worry about your relationship with Grandpa? I’ve read alotof romance novels, Sam. I know pining when I see it.”
I exhaled a groan. “I’m pining for Harper, are you happy? But if I took a job that had me out on multi-day hikes every week, I’d be no better than Dad staying in the office until nine every night.”
“Sam.”
Wow. My sister’s soft, heart-breaking voice brought a lump to my throat like it’d just been waiting to spring into place. I tried to swallow it back, but it wouldn’t budge. “Dad did what he wanted without regard for what anyone else wanted or needed. We’re pretty similar.”
Those similarities had tormented me all night, the fear that maybe the apple hadn’t fallen far from the tree, after all. I wouldn’t cheat on Harper, but there were plenty of other ways to choose my happiness over hers. I didn’t want to be that kind of man. I wouldn’t.
But I couldn’t prove it unless she was willing to choose me, too.
“Sam, Dad made his choices. And I’m right there with you, his choices sucked for us and for Mom. But you aren’t like Dad.”
I’d never thought I was, but lately, I didn’t see enough differences. “I left everyone here to go off and do my own thing.”
“Do you think those are equal? Dad left his wife and kids for another woman. You spread your wings and left the nest like a normal kid. You didn’t abandon anyone or neglect anyone.”
Wrong thing to say. I’d abandoned Harper. And maybe it’d been inevitable, maybe we would have broken up then no matter how things had shaken out, but it didn’t change my regret over what I’d done.
“And don’t work for Dad if you’re doing it because you think it will help things with Harper. You want to have a good relationship with her, go get a job that makes you happy. Because then, you’ll be happy when you’re with her, too, instead of always trying to recover from your soul-sucking desk job.”
She had a point. Just wasn’t sure Harper would see it that way if I was gone all the time.
“I don’t even know if I could get that job in Georgetown.”
“Boy, love is sure making you a Negative Nelly. What happened to In-Your-Face Sam? To Jump First, Regret it Later Sam?”
“At the moment, he’s too busy being terrified he’s lost the woman he loves again to be in your face.”
She patted my cheek, turning it into a light slap at the end. “So pathetic.”
“You’re right. You’re right.” I stood and shook my arms and legs out like I was getting ready to fight the handsy MMA instructor. “I should just phone Pierce Vaughn, apologize for leaving the way I did, and ask for a job recommendation.”
“It’s not like he’s going to say no,” Georgia called from the couch. “They want you back, they’ll definitely give you a recommendation.”
Some of my enthusiasm faded. “Doesn’t change the crappy hours I’d have as a guide, though.”
I came back to try to make a real life with Harper. Could I really have that if we were apart half the time?
“Look on the bright side. Maybe Harper doesn’t want to spend as much time with you as you think.”
“Wow. Thank you. Ten out of ten on the pep talk.”
A knock came at her door, and she hopped off the couch. “Just saying.” She swung the door open and turned to me, eyes wide. “Or I could be wrong.”
Harper stood in the open doorway, all glorious and lovely. She’d tugged a beanie down over her windswept hair and had streaks of something I guessed was flour on her jeans. She looked cold and tired and about as miserable as I’d been feeling, but she washere.
“Hi,” she said, her eyes locked on mine.
“I am going to go do something in my bedroom.” Georgia backed away from the door and slunk down the short hallway to her room.
Harper walked the rest of the way inside, closing the door behind her. I moved closer to meet her, itching to pull her into my arms. I wouldn’t yet—I’d messed things up between us out of a desire to let her choose, so I needed to be patient. Why on earth I’d opted for patience now, I couldn’t say. Never been very good at that, honestly.
“I realized I, uh…” She swallowed, glancing around Georgia’s ultra-Christmasy apartment. “I messed up my Life List, and I need your help.”
My heart deflated like a sad little balloon. We were back to talking about her list now? “How?”
