Page 43 of Stay this Christmas
Harper: Sam went with me
Two seconds after my text switched toRead, her incoming call started up. Steeling myself against whatever she would throw at me, I answered.
“Hi.”
She made a sound of disgust. “Don’t youHime.Samwent to the class with you? What is going on?”
“Nothing’s going on.”
The more I said it, the less convinced of it I became. That simple friendship I kept holding onto felt a lot like handfuls of sand. I could clutch at it all I liked, but the tighter I squeezed, the more it slipped away.
Just what it would be replaced with—nope. I’d put all that in theDo Not Think Aboutbin.
“Why do you lie to me like this? What have I ever done to you? I mean, besides the years of mooching off of you.”
I paused, trying to sort out the best explanation that would satisfy her and not completely mortify me. No explanation here left me with the high ground. Not with the way she would quiz me. “We’re trying to be friends again.”
“Friends.” She sounded like I’d said something horrible.
Now that she’d happily coupled up, she seemed to forget the years she’d spent avoiding dating, too. She hadn’t even had a guy friend in all that time, let alone a boyfriend. But somehow, I was the strange one for not diving straight into romance with Sam.
“Yes, friends, Eliza. I’m not getting worked up about this, and I don’t want you to, either.”
And if I did get worked up about it, that would not be open for public scrutiny.
“Maybe you should get worked up about it. Why do you have to be so sensible about everything all the time? Why can’t you just let your hair down and say ‘I’m getting back with my ex and I love it’?”
Exactly why I hadn’t shared anything about Sam with her. She went from zero to heart eyes in three seconds flat.
“We’re not getting back together, Eliza. We’re just getting to know each other again.”
I didn’t know what to call our list-swap arrangement. Trying for friendship sounded like the most straightforward description. Trying for more would just leave me disappointed in the end.
Because therewouldbe an end. Sam would take off to explore the world again eventually, just a matter of when.
That little reminder made my heart squeeze until it felt wrung out. For the best, though. I needed to go into this list thing with my eyes wide open and my heart firmly shut. Boarded up and out of business.
“Oh. Sure, yeah. I see. You’re getting to know each other. Like Eden and Booker got to know each other.”
Gah, why did everything have to go there? “No.”
“Like June and Ty got to know each other.”
“Eliza.”
“Like Dean and I got to know each other.”
“Absolutely not.”
“Because let me tell you, Dean and I know each otherverywell.”
Ugh, gross. “I’ve heard enough, thanks.”
Lights flashed outside as a car pulled behind mine in the driveway. “Listen, I have to go, Sam’s—”
I shut my mouth on the rest, but too late. Why, mouth, why?
“Sam’s what?” She full-on gasped. “Sam’sthere? Oh, my gosh, I knew it—”
