Page 12 of Under the Texas Sky
“Good boy,” I whisper into his ear as I slide my hand in between our erections to massage the puckered skin of his ass. Praise is what he loves, and he deserves more praise right now than I can give him, but I’m going to try my best. He’s been doing so good, the thing he needs most is to know how much I love and care for him.
His hole is clenched tight, and I slow down my thrusts against his dick. His eyes are bright, shining with pent up need, and his lips are kiss-swollen. He’s so freaking gorgeous.
“Relax for me baby, let me in,” I say, gently running my nose up the length of his ear.
He releases a shuddering breath, and the tension in his body eases just enough for the tip of my finger to enter him. I let out a moan, feeling the warmth. Pressing farther into him, I search for the spot that will make him see stars and have him shooting off in less than a minute. He’s such a bottom-slut. He loves when I shove my fingers, or my dick, in his ass.
“Fffuck-fuck. Ki, please, please make me come.” He swivels his hips against my finger, begging me to go faster.
“Do you want to come on my fingers, baby? Are they enough for a slut like you?”
Just to tease him, I drag my dick across his slowly and press against the sensitive spot inside him. I want to draw this out, to cause him pain the way he’s been causing me pain. To show him what it feels like to want something so badly that is within your grasp, but you can’t have it.
“Yes… no… I don’t know,” he mumbles, lust drunk.
I take pity on him. Thrusting faster, I keep my finger pegging him, and shove my tongue down his throat. Swallowing his moans and keeping them all to myself. I’m greedy for everything he has to offer. “Come on, come for me. I know you can do it," I murmur against his mouth.
His ass tightens around my fingers, causing my own orgasm to crest, until I’m blacking out with pleasure and I can feel his cum jetting out of him and coating his body.
I crash on top of him, pulling out my fingers and sucking in greedy gulps of air. My poor body screaming its pleasure and discomfort simultaneously
“Goodnight Trent,” I say, unmoving because I refuse to separate us. To sever the small connection we have between us. It’s been a rough freaking week waking up without him in our bed, and I want to take advantage of any moment I can get with him.
“Goodnight, Ki. I love you.”
CHAPTER 11
TRENT
Another week, another meeting. They’re getting easier now. Next week I get assigned a sponsor and I’m surprisingly excited about it. Shocking, I know, but it’s been going well. Kian stops by every night for at least thirty minutes after he gets off work. Every other night he sleeps over.
His green eyes are getting back the shine I love so much.
The time apart has been good for us, but it fucking sucks just as much. Knowing that he’s so close yet so far away. I’m trying to stay on the right track for him just as much as I am myself.
We haven’t had sex since that night, we’ve been content to lay in bed and hold each other until we drift off to sleep. Sex has never been a problem for us, if anything it's the way we fixed issues in the past. We would fight, fuck, and make up. I don’t want to do that anymore. I want to be better, a better person, a better lover, and a better friend.
Ever since my breakdown that night, I've been focusing on communication. Which fucking sucks, but Matt–the leader of the group–sat me down one day. When he told me he and his husband went through the same thing that me and Kian are going through, I had to pick my jaw up off the floor. I don’t know any openly gay people. I mean, sure, there are lots of out and proud people, but not in our small town.
He told me even being sober wasn’t enough to help them. What helped was talking, telling the other person what was going on in their head even when it seemed difficult.
That terrified me, as I’ve always protected Kian from the worst parts of me. But I guess I wasn't protecting him enough, since we still ran into issues.
So I took the advice to heart, and I went home and started small with Mitch.
“My stepdad once told me I was never going to amount to anything.”
It was hard to confess that out loud to Mitch, even though he already knew to an extent, from the talk of town and from what Kian had said. But this was the first time it came out of my mouth.
“Fuck him and fuck your momma, too, for letting that piece of shit into your home.”
I choked on a sob, but Mitch pulled me into his arms and held me close. The woodsy scent of his aftershave reminded me that just because things are bad now, they won’t be bad forever.
I tried it with Kian next, and it was even fucking harder.
“Sometimes, I think you’ll see the real me and resent me for it.” Swallowing bleach would have been easier than forcing those words out of my mouth.
But, in true Kian fashion, he reassured me that he loves me. That he’s seen every part of me, and he doesn’t care. He doesn’t care that I’m damaged, and that alone was enough to make me fall in love with him all over again.
