Page 70 of Under the Texas Sky
“I want us to be together, but I want to be the man I know I can be for you. It’s taken a lot of time, and a lot of therapy, but that’s how I can sit here in front of you and tell you how I feel.”
I swallow past the lump in my throat, knowing that he still wants me, even after everything we’ve been through. Can I be that man for him? He doesn't deserve the fluctuating emotions that I seem to have. I need to be sure that this is something I can do, for him and for us.
He doesn’t wait for me to reply to his declaration, instead he gets out of the truck and rounds to my door. When he opens it for me, I’m hit with a sudden wind chill, and I’m rethinking all my plans.
“The park where you told me I was beautiful,” Trent says. “Classic.”
I smile at the memory. It was so awkward, but it worked out in the end for the most part. “I thought we could have a picnic, but it’s a little colder than I realized. I hope you don’t mind if I steal all your body heat.”
His smile is beautiful, with the slight gap in between his teeth that I love so much. “I have an extra blanket under the backseat. I’ll grab it.”
When Trent holds his hand out to me, I grab it, holding it close to my chest. He fetches the blanket, and also hands me the bag I packed.
I grab the blanket from him and tell him to give me a moment. Leaving him standing beside the truck, I work on placing the blanket and pillows I brought, making a small sitting area in the back of his truck. I pull out the peanut butter and jelly sandwiches I prepared, and the fruit platter and battery operated tea lights that I grabbed from the store.
Walking back over to him, I tell him to turn around so I can wrap my hands around his face and cover his eyes. He’s a smidge taller than me, so guiding him to the bed of the pick up truck isn’t as easy as I would like. My dick rubs against his ass in his pants. The smooth satin of my underwear increases my pleasure, and I pull back while my insides feel like they’re on fire.
Nope. No. Bad dick.We have other things to do than get off.
“Surprise,” I whisper in his ear, feeling the brush of his hair against my mouth.
“Ki, you didn’t have to do all this,” he says. His wide smile says differently though, and I love being responsible for that smile. I think of all the times that he went out of his way to do nice thingsfor me, and I realize why he always did it. Not because he wanted recognition for doing nice things, but because he loved making me happy. Just like I love making him happy. I will do this every day for the rest of our lives if we give this a chance.
We sit on the tailgate, making small talk over our sandwiches and the bite sized fruit. It’s nice, it’s just like old times. Conversations about what TV shows we like to watch now, new music we’ve found, random drama we’ve overheard. It feels like two friends catching up, instead of two lovers who have been forced apart by the universe.
Maybe the universe is trying to tell us something now, maybe that this is how it should be. Easy. Not toxic. No fighting or arguments over minute things. We’ve both grown up over the two years we’ve been apart.
“I’m shocked you like working with Adam. He seems like the exact person you used to butt heads with,” I remark, taking a bite of a juicy strawberry. I feel the juice trickle down my chin, and Trent wipes his thumb across it to clean it up, then pops the same digit in his mouth.
“He’s my best friend, but don’t get me wrong, we butt heads all the time. Especially when it comes to life outside of work.”
I roll my eyes.
“I saw that,” Trent remarks, mock glaring at me.
“Sorry,” I mutter petulantly. Staring down at the strawberry stem I have clutched between my fingers. I want to pop some other morsel of food in my mouth to keep from having to talk anymore about Adam, but all that's left is crumbs.
“Truth?” he asks, staring deep into my eyes like he’s trying to read my soul.
“Adam doesn’t like me,” I admit, sheepishly. My insecurities flare when the thought hits me. What if this won’t work out between me and Trent now because his best friend doesn’t approve? I’ve never had to worry about that before, but now it’s the only thought pinging in my mind.
“What are you talking about? Why do you think he doesn’t like you?” Trent asks, astonished, and a little skeptical.
“He told me to stay away from you.” I watch a squirrel scale a tree and climb to the highest branch. How they aren’t scared of falling is beyond me.
“He said what?” Trent grits out, and when I lift my eyes to his, his are hardened into a glare.
“He told me you weren’t a toy,” I mumble under my breath, looking away again, embarrassment flooding my face. I know Trent's not a toy, but admitting it outloud puts my flaws on display. Telling him how his friend can quickly pick me apart and berate me for things he only had one-sided knowledge for isn't going to bode well for mywin Trent back plan.
Trent’s fingers find the underside of my chin, and he lifts my face up to meet his eyes. “Whatever he said, forget it. He is a grump, but he does it because he cares. He doesn’t know that I would do anything to be with you again. No matter how many times my heart gets broken, I’ll keep putting it on the line for a chance to have anything with you.”
Tears burn my eyes, and I want to openly sob and let him hold me and comfort me. I want him to never let me go.
“I won’t hurt you, I promise. I won’t hurt you again,” I swear, as I cross my fingers across my heart in a promise.
“I know you won’t, Ki. But there’s a lot we need to talk about.”
My smile is watery, but I nod anyway, because thereisa lot we still have to talk about. I respect him enough to give him the time to tell me on his own terms.
