Page 65 of Sunrises & Salvation
When my mother collapsed, too, I screamed. Hoping someone, anyone, would help, because what the fuck happened?
My breathing was choppy; no matter how deeply I tried to inhale, I couldn’t pull oxygen into my lungs fast enough to calm my racing heart.
One of the kitchen staff ran into the dining room, and through the strong nausea and tightness in my chest, I tried to explain what happened.
I passed out and woke up in the hospital. Danielle and her mom were waiting outside my hospital room, and as soon as they told me what happened, I knew my life would be fucked beyond repair.
An orphan.
So then I had to move in with Danielle and her mom until I graduated high school. My parents named her as my guardian in case anything happened to them. It was just a little too convenient with everything else, but I didn’t question it. I didn’tthink that her mom, or my parents, would be able to have a hold on us forever. Boy, was I fucking wrong.
Apparently, before my dad died, he and Danielle’s mom were already working up an agreement for me and Danielle to wed, after we graduated college, of course. Some scam to make sure the wealth from both our families could stay centralized, and they would both benefit from it.
All of this. All of this was put into effect before I got a say or had any knowledge of it. Because my mother had put cyanide in our cups.
The memory still haunts me, the concern about someone touching my drink without my knowledge causes the familiar panic to bubble up until it overflows.
Until Hunter, the one person I trust not to hurt me. The one person who I know will make sure I’m taken care of and okay. I’ve never had that before him.
I quickly text him.
Adam:I miss you. Hurry back, there’s something I need you to hear.
Because there is something I need him to hear. I need him to know how much I love him. I love Hunter Collins so much it shouldn’t make sense. Itdoesn’tmake sense, nothing about us does. But I don’t care. I’m going to look into his dark brown eyes and utter those three words I’ve never said to anyone. Because I’ve never before felt the way I feel about Hunter. Like my skin is on fire when his body grazes mine, or like I’m missing a piece of myself when he’s gone.
There’s a knock on my door, some kind of divine intervention if that’s him, not giving me time to back out and truly think about the consequences of what will happen if it gets out that we’re together. But thoughts of the future are on the back burner in my mind. The only thing I care about ishim.
I open the door, and my good mood plummets. Standing in the hallway, with a glare from hell and red-rimmed eyes, is Danielle. Oh, fuck.
I swallow, choking down the bile that’s rising in my throat, because I’m not ready to talk to her yet, not like this. When she’s already obviously upset, it won’t be good for either of us.
But as she walks in the entryway, and I’m wiping my sweat-coated palms on my pants, I know that no matter which choice I make—to stand in front of her, confidently telling her that Hunter and I are together, or if I lie to save us some time, it’s going to be wrong. And it should be wrong, because I’m an asshole for wanting to hide this from Danielle.
This is her life on the line, too, and no matter how much she truly wants to give her mom the middle finger and tell her tofuck off,that’s just not feasible.
She has no reason to care if Hunter and I are together, not really. But as she looks at me with watery green eyes, I realize that I’m going to have to look at the person I’ve hurt and confront my feelings. And Hunter is a better man than I ever will be.
“Hey, what’s up?” I ask, aiming for nonchalance.
“How long, Adam?” She gets straight to the point, and I wrap my arms protectively around my midsection. Playing dumb won’t get me far, but I’m not thinking rationally. Between the the flashback from earlier, thinking of Hunter, and already being scared to talk to her, my mind is a war zone.
“What?”
She huffs, her annoyance showing through as she swipes at her cheeks. It breaks my heart to watch her in distress, but I don’t reach out to comfort her, I can’t.
“How long have you and Hunter been fucking around?” My mind freezes, but she doesn’t seem to care as she lays into me, raising her voice with every syllable. “You told me that we had tokeep thisrelationshipbelievable. You have drilled that into my skull since the day I told you I didn’t want to do this anymore.You told me we have to.And now here you are, willing to risk everything!” She screams the last word at me, and I flinch.
I wasn’t ready to talk about it before, and I’m definitely not ready to talk about it now, because what she’s saying is true. I’m a hypocrite. I was the one who said we should stick with the courtship bullshit, to make sure that I got my inheritance and she got through college without her mom on her back.
At the time, I thought it was a win-win for both of us. I can see now that what I’ve done is worse. I’ve betrayed her. Not because of the cheating, but because of how far I went to hide the truth from her.
“Just tell me the truth, Adam, are you and Hunter together?” She sounds resigned at this point, and I heave a deep breath.
“No, why would you ask that?” Hunter will understand when I tell him how she came in here upset, he’ll understand why I couldn’t tell her. I’ll find a better time and we’ll work through this.
“Don’t. Don’t fucking do that Adam. Don’t make me out to be the crazy one for thinking that.”
“Then don’t act fucking crazy and I won’t.” The words are out of my mouth before I can realize, and I watch her nostrils flare. But this isn’t how this was supposed to go and everything is getting fucked up because I don’t know what to do. I need Hunter here with me, because he would know the best way to take care of this.
