Page 10 of To Love a Monster
I think about giving him a piece of my mind but decide against it and instead put the phone down.I lower the phone to the counter, switch off the running water and decide to make some coffee while I figure out what to do next.
****
Afew hours pass andI finally call Tess, making sure I keep it surface-level.The last thing I need is her running her concerns about my mental health past my mother.“I’m gonna need that real estate search,” I say, trying to sound breezy.
Tess hums.“You mean for that creepy-hot dude you imagined?Or saw.I don’t know which version we’re going with.”
I’m already regretting this.I wish I could take the call back, scrub it from existence like that text message.My voice is sharp, but not sharp enough to hide the fear.“I didn’t imagine him.”
She goes quiet.“Okay,” she says after a beat.“I’m going to my parents’ this weekend.I’ll check their database while I’m there.But, Lila, please try to relax.”
I press my forehead to the window.Try to let her words mean something.But they don’t.
“Hey,” she laughs, the sound stretching thin over the phone, “I’ll call you soon.Love you, okay?”
I end the call with a hollow, “Love you too,” and toss the phone onto the couch.The lake outside is silent.Still.But I know he’s out there.And if I go back to the studio, if I peel away that sheet, he’ll still be there too.Waiting.
The last thing I need is to tell Tess everything.I hold back the things I really want to say and it burns.Just like it always does.The things that are sharp and heavy, sticking under my ribs.But I keep them in.If I told her about the text messages and how the cop just brushed me off it would only make things worse.
I let the silence eat at me.My insides churning with panic and words I don’t say.I wait, counting heartbeats, breath, steps from one side of the room to the other.Anything to keep from going insane.My body feels loose and unwound and ready to break.
I walk to the studio, eyes fixed on the window.My bare feet drag over the floor, the studio door swings open and I pull the sheet away.Just a corner, just enough to see.And he’s still there, exactly like I knew he would be.The man in the trees, waiting and watching.I pull the cover back down, the hangover haze dulling everything but my anxiety.
****
Surveillance Log: L.M
Subject: Lila Montgomery
Location: Matteo’s Cabin
Status: Device sync complete
She’s not ready for what’s coming.But she’s close.I watched her sleep last night.Shirt twisted around her waist.No pants.No bra.Just the sweet press of her nipples visible through the fabric and thighs slightly parted like she was waiting.
I shouldn’t have gotten that close.I’ve told myself that a thousand fucking times.But I couldn’t help but be mesmerized by her.Legs tangled.Her pale thighs spread open and exposed like a goddamn invitation.She sleeps like she doesn’t know the world is dangerous.Like she doesn’t know I exist.
I could’ve touched her, just reached out and traced the line of her hip.I could have slid my hand beneath the material of her underwear and felt the soft heat of her skin.She’d moan in her sleep.Arch into it.
I didn’t, but I wanted to.And it took every bit of self-control not to give in to the temptation.
The only reason I didn’t cave was because the first time I have her, I want her awake.Eyes wide.Lips parted.Pulse racing beneath my palm.I want her to know it’s me.That I’m the one who won’t let her go.
She doesn’t even know how close she is to being claimed.But she will.Soon, I’ll crawl into that bed.And she’ll beg me not to leave it.
She painted me, captured me watching her from the shadows beneath the trees.The way I leaned on that trunk.The angle of my jaw.She even got the tension in my stance.But she didn’t get my eyes.Not yet.I sent the messages through the ghost number I buried in her system last night.The spyware synced while she was dreaming.Now I can see her camera, her messages, her location.And I’m not going to stop teasing her until she becomes addicted to the rush of it.
She knows I watched her make herself come.Knows I watched her rub her pussy as she moaned into the silence.Her reaction to that was delicious.The panic, the way she tried to call the cops.Little does she know that I replaced that number with my own.That it was really me with a masked voice listening to her frustration building when she realized that nobody was coming to check on her allegations.And when she walked past that painting?She flinched like it called her name.
She doesn’t know how close I was last night.How long I stood above her, breathing in the scent of her shampoo and sweat.She doesn’t know that I’ve memorized the shape of her hips, her skin beneath that shirt.That I will touch her soon.I keep promising myself I’ll wait, but the closer I get to her, the more I’m losing patience.
I haven’t seen any threats around the cabin yet.No new players, no one watching her but me.I should report that.But I won’t.Because the longer I’m the only one watching, the more time I have to lure her in until she’s begging for me.She’s slowly falling apart, and when she breaks?I’ll be there to put her back together.Piece by piece.Exactly the way I like.
—N
