Page 35 of Our Big White Lie
“Right. Yeah.” I laughed, and it came out sounding almost as forced as it was. “I think we’ll be good.”
“Definitely.” Was her laugh forced? Or was she better at this than I was? “Well. Um.” She shook herself. “I should probably think about calling it a night. It’s been a long day.” She looked at me through her lashes, then quickly broke eye contact. “Not because… Not because we, you know…”
“I get it. Don’t worry. And, um, I probably should too. I’m taking my mom shopping tomorrow, and we’re getting an early start.”
“Oh. Oh, good! That’ll be fun.” Tori smiled, and yeah, my knees went a little wobbly. What the hell? “Tell her I said hi.”
“I will. I’ll, um… I’ll see you sometime tomorrow, then. After I get home.”
“Sounds good. I’ll…” She looked around as if desperately trying to find a direction. Her gaze landed on the wine bottle. “I’ll put our glasses in the dishwasher and cork the bottle.”
That would take all of two minutes, but I was relieved for a chance to exit stage left, and I went into my bedroom while she continued in the kitchen.
Alone, I sank onto my bed. I ran my fingertips along my lower lip.
Had we really…
Oh my God. I’d never let myself spend much time wondering about being more than friends with Tori. If she was into me, she’d have let me know by now—she’d never even flirted withme!— so there wasn’t any point in dwelling on it. We were friends. Roommates. About to be sort-of-married.
I’d known for years that that was all we’d ever be.
Why was I suddenly regretting it tonight?
CHAPTER TWELVE
Tori
The next day, I was still reeling. I’d barely slept. I couldn’t think about anything except Ava. And that kiss. Andthatkiss. And the one after that.
What the… How had…
What in the world happened?
It wasn’t the wine. It just wasn’t. Yeah, we’d both had some before we’d kissed, but we hadn’t been drunk. Maybe tipsy enough to be a little giggly, and I sure wouldn’t have wanted one of us to drive, but I’d been lucid and coherent. I was pretty sure Ava had been as well.
That wasn’t a drunken kiss that got out of control. We’d had some liquid courage to try kissing before we got in front of our engagement photographer and our wedding guests. It wasn’t like we’d been throwing back shots and wound up doing something stupid.
I remembered everything about Ava’s kiss. The warmth of her lips. The hum of her voice when she let go of that nearly inaudible moan. The shape of her body between my hands.
What the hell just happened? Because none of that felt fake or like a performance. If she was performing, then she deserveda goddamned Oscar. I sure hadn’t been. The moment I’d had her lips against mine, I’d just… forgotten everything.
Everything except her. Her mouth. Her body. Her closeness.
Seriously—what the hell?
This was all supposed to be fake. It was all supposed to be an act—something we did to make her mom happy while she was still with us. It was supposed to be something I did for my best friend, not…
I closed my eyes and swallowed against the lump in my throat.
This wasn’t supposed to make feelings bubble up that I hadn’t even known were there. What the hell?
At least Ava was out with her mom today. I wasn’t so sure I could’ve faced her. Not before I got my head together, which I was making absolutely no progress on doing.
I needed some advice before I lost my mind.
And thank God, I had someone I could ask.
Marco got to the house in record time.
