Page 37 of Anywhere with You
“Would he? I don’t know.” Cara picked up a stray piece of chocolate frosting and popped it into her mouth. “Anyway, I never wanted to have to go searching for romance, you know? All those matchmaking apps and programs seem so hard, especially after all these years without practice. I don’t even know if I want to fall in love again. I don’t know if it’s worth the trouble.”
I nodded. “All that getting-to-know-you, getting comfortable stuff is the worst. I want to be settled. I don’t want to have to ask the questions and have the doubts. Maybe that’s part of the problem, though. I didn’task the questions. Maybe I shouldn’t have assumed that she still meant what she said when we first got together. Or maybe I should’ve paid more attention when she said she had doubts. I thought we were fine because neither of us was getting arrested for turtle trafficking, but that’s a pretty low bar. Maybe she grew into another person, and I didn’t keep getting to know her.”
Cara was watching me, fork hovering above her plate.
“What?”
“That’s a lot of introspection. Here, have another margarita.”
I laughed and accepted. She gave a smile and a polite wave to get Fenske’s attention.
“I need you to get one thing straight, Honey,” she said as he approached. “None of this is your fault. You don’t take the blame for a cheater.”
She ordered us both a second margarita, and I took my empty glass and touched it to hers.
“Same.”
“Yes,” she said. “Same. I spent weeks doing that, wondering what I could’ve done, what I could’ve been, that would’ve made Lorenzo be faithful to me. But the fact is, I was me, just like when I was a kid and in love with the guitarist with Elton John glasses. And I’m going to keep being me, and if that’s not what they want…if that’s not whathewants, then I’m glad he left.”
She said it without quavering, but her eyes were wet. I placed my hand palm up on the table between us, and she took it, squeezing. I didn’t feel the heart-pounding awareness that had accompanied holding her hand in the cliff dwellings, but this was, in its own way, no less intimate.
For the hundredth time, I wondered how I’d spent so much time with this woman over the years without getting to know her.
“At this point,” I said, squeezing her hand tightly, “I’m pretty sure that no man deserves you.”
“I don’t know what that means coming from a lesbian.”
I was still laughing when our second round of margaritas arrived.
Chapter Fifteen
I should’ve guessed that our hotel was nearby. Cara wasn’t the type to drink two margaritas and get back on the road. But I didn’t realize it was literally next door.
“I actually thought it was the one across the street,” Cara said, checking our reservation. “But that’s good. This one looks nicer.”
We checked in, took the elevator to the third floor, found our room, each crawled into one of the two double beds, and switched off the lights.
Thirty seconds later, the edges of sleep within reach, Cara said, “What do you think is the key to a happy and lasting relationship?”
I groaned, too tired from talking and more than ready for sleep. “Is this from your road trip conversations list?”
“Come on,” she said in such a chipper and cajoling tone that I had to wonder if my alcohol was burning off faster than hers.
“Money,” I said, then paused to yawn. “Lots of sex. Not cheating on your wife with ugly-ass dudes.”
She sat up. “You think Lorenzo is ugly? I mean,he’sno Enrique Iglesias, but…”
“I think he could be a dreamboat if he ate more vegetables and got some plastic surgery.”
But it wasn’t true. He could get all the plastic surgery in the world, and he would still be the ogre who cheated on Cara. He would be ugly forever.
I yawned again. “Can I sleep now?”
Cara was silent for another thirty seconds. Then, “Did you see the new Mesmio reel?”
For several seconds, my margarita-soaked brain thought she was talking about our Mesmio. But then the pieces of our conversation clicked.
“No,” I said, sounding more awake even to myself.
