Page 69 of Run, Run Rudolph
“Not officially, no,” I said carefully, holding myself in check. It was like a cold, giant rock had formed between us, the lightness gone, and in its place a giant, spiky boundary of wrong words. Did she no longer want to be a part of the Powell inner circle? Was that why she’d been avoiding me around town for so long? She wanted out?
“But you’re family to me,” I said. She was part of my life. She could call me any time, and I’d come running. And my parents would, too.
“Please don’t.”
“Don’t what?”
“I know you’re not charging me because you feel like you can’t. But you can. Okay? I’m not family.”
“Do you want out?” My voice felt small, my tone level and emotionless, even though her answer had the power to devastate me.
“It’s not that.” She tipped her head to the side, her expression pained. “If you think of me like a sister, just charge me your usual fee tonight.”
She had such a sorrowful look I wanted to scoop her into my arms and kiss away every doubt she had about what she meant to me, and where she placed in my life. She was brave, kind, and generous. She offered lifelines to people I’d have cut out of my life. She gave people a second chance to rise to the occasion, and to her expectations of them. And if they failed, she still continued to be kind. She received the best of everyone, but sometimes their best just wasn’t enough.
I wanted to be my best. I wanted to be enough for her.
But I didn’t know how to get from here, to where I wanted to be. I’d resisted any romantic feelings or attraction toward her for so long that I no longer knew how to clear the invisible hurdles I’d put up to block myself.
“I’m not charging you. And it’s not just because I don’t have a line in my accounting software for magical flying reindeer,” I said gruffly.
“So, you do think of me as a sister?” she asked.
“I would never…”
I screwed my eyes tight, realizing this was the watershed moment for us. The moment when I could make her understand.
I opened my eyes and stepped close, our bodies tight together. She lifted her chin defiantly.
“I would never…ever…”
My voice was almost a growl.
I scooped my hands into her hair, loosening her ponytail as I lined up our mouths, prepared to release the storm of pent-up longing battling inside me.
“…kiss a sister.”
Chapter 21
~ Tamara ~
Haden knew exactly how to kiss me. His hands were in my hair. His lips were angled just so. His tongue was dipping and diving, meeting mine. It felt so good to be in his arms, to be cherished and held. He was the perfect height, so easy to kiss, and I wanted every future kiss in my life to be this magical.
Feeling bold, I ran my hands over Haden’s waist and up the curve of his back. He was muscular and fit, the planes of his torso perfect under my palms. His fingers tightened in my hair, sending a delicious shiver down my spine, and I inadvertently moaned into his mouth, immediately feeling self-conscious for showing my pleasure.
I angled my lips, tipping my head so he wouldn’t try to kiss me again. I needed to get a grip on myself. I needed to focus on all the reasons Haden and I shouldn’t be doing this. I needed to work on the broken logic in my brain that had to be swept up and set straight again.
Because none of this made sense.
He wanted me.
He most definitely did not think of me as a sister.
His lips had moved to my neck, and I shuddered with pleasure, sagging against him as he left a trail of magic down my nerve endings. Was it actually possible that this man had secretly wanted me for so long, too? That we’d both been burying our attraction and denying it, and that Kade had seen what we’d refused to recognize?
Had he been trying to keep us apart? To keep me from this bliss?
And what was this exactly? Temporary bliss influenced by the magic around us, or something more?
