Page 50 of Unless It's You
I’m overthinking all of this.
And as I know from my current read, people in romance novels—like the brightly colored rose pink and sky blue and light green ones over on that bookshelf—sometimes make out with people who they once thought hated them.
Ethan notices my silence, and now he’s staring at me, too, scratching Nessie’s head without even looking at her. The air is thick, and the silence is heavy. I feel like I’m breathing too loud. I lick my lips unintentionally, and his gaze darts down and back up quickly.
I’m not going for a happily ever after, but I’m going to checkthis off the bucket list I didn’t know I had. My own bucket list. Before I can stop myself, I lunge forward and crash our mouths together, his beard tickling my chin, his lips soft and giving. I put my hands on his chest and quiver at the hard muscles beneath his shirt. Time freezes as our bodies connect and those damn sparks have moved from my arms to my center, running up my spine, guiding me to move closer to him. We’re connected, but neither of us moves our lips. They’re simply touching, softly, but burning and sparking at the contact. I could stay here a hundred years, but I want more.
A desperate sound escapes his throat and I lean into him further, our lips molding together perfectly, his soft and gentle. He slides a hand into my hair and opens his mouth slightly, moving his other hand down my arm and onto my waist, settling on the top of my hip. There’s an ache between my legs and I want his hands all over me. I want to be as close to this man as possible. My hand clenches around his shirt, pulling him closer.
My head is empty, except for one thought:I’m kissing Ethan Fraser.He slips his tongue into my mouth, exploring, testing, and I breathe into him. I shift instinctively on the couch, planning to straddle him to try to soothe the ache, when a searing pain in my hand shocks my system.
I gasp and fly back from the kiss to find Nessie with her teeth buried in my thumb, front paws leaning against Ethan’s chest. “Holy shit!”
“Christ, Nessie.” Ethan lets out a fast breath and gently pries the kitten off of me, staring down at the prick of blood on my thumb. “You’re bleeding. She’s never actually broken skin. Let me put her away.”
Ethan disappears down the hall for thirty seconds and returns to the couch without a cat, but with a tissue. He gingerly takes my hand and presses the tiny wound, which has already stopped bleeding.
“She did not like that.” My heart is racing a hundred miles anhour. I want to tell him that even if Nessie didn’t like us kissing, I did.
Ethan looks up at me, gazing into my eyes, then looking down at my lips, still pulsing from his kiss.
“Stella...” he starts, but his phone vibrates loudly on the coffee table. The name Helen dances across the screen.
Reality crashes down on me. This happened last time. We kissed and had an amazing night, but then I found out he was getting back with Helen. Then I dated Ben.
I know he’s seeing Helen again. That he saw her last weekend when he was up in Newcastle. And we’ve kissed, and now I’m going to see Ben again.
It’s déjà vu. I hate it.
This is a horrible mistake. I brace myself for whatever he’s about to say, then realize I don’t want to hear it at all. The pleasant tingles up my spine are replaced with a grip on my digestive system that makes me want to throw up. I wish I could disappear out of this flat and away from my humiliation.
“Shit,” I say, my voice small and shaky. “I’m so sorry I did that.”
But am I?
Yes. Definitely. I just made things so much more complicated in every part of my life. Work, Evelyn’s bucket list, my personal life.Damn!
“No. Stella. Let’s talk about this.” His voice is almost sharp, and I wait for him to continue, dreading what he’s going to say, but his cell phone starts vibrating again and voices ring out in the hallway outside the flat, followed immediately by key sounds at the front door.
Someone curses, and another person laughs.Thank god, an interruption.To let me escape this mistake.
This is my out.
“Bloody hell.” Ethan’s eyes dart from the front door to thephone vibrating its way to the edge of the table. “Fucking worst timing.”
“Well, hello.” A voice booms from the now-open door.
Ethan briefly glances at the new arrivals, then returns his gaze to me. “Colin. This is...” He pauses, like he forgot my name, which is ridiculous, but maybe he’s trying to figure out who the hell I really am. “Stella. Stella, this is Colin, my roommate, and our friend, Sam.”
Then Ethan’s expression changes, as if he’s just thought of something, or figured something out. Probably what a mistake I am.
“We’re playing poker tonight, mate. Didn’t you remember?” Colin strides over to the kitchen, loading drinks into the fridge.
I need to get out of here.
“I was just leaving. Ethan, see you later.” I leap up, dart around the couch, and grab my bag from where it rests by Ethan’s at the open door. Colin watches me with a confused grin.
“I’ll walk you out of the building.” Ethan stands and moves toward me. He’s staring at me intently, all broad shoulders and tattoos and... he’s just untouchable. And I tried to touch him.
