Page 53 of Unless It's You
I watch Stella, memorizing every angle and line of her face, waiting for her to continue talking. Remembering how it felt to bury my hand in her hair. Wondering how it would feel to maybe tug her head back so I could get to her neck. I shift in my chair and swallow, sure the whole room can hear my thoughts.
“As you know, we identified several location options.” Stella glances at me and holds eye contact, even though I suspect by her restless fingers tapping on the table that she’s just as unsettled.
She keeps talking, but I’m so distracted by her lips, and her neck, and her hands... I love being the center of her attention. I feel special, even though it’s her literal job to present to the client, which is me. I nod to indicate I hear her, even though I’m waiting to interrupt and tell her what I’ve already decided.
“Obviously, we need a forest and mountain type setting, so our team identified a location in Wales to the north of Cardiff.” Stella’s cheeks pinken and she breaks eye contact and looks back at the computer to the video call. “As a second option, a pseudo-mountain about an hour’s drive from London, more like a rolling hill really, but we could make it look legit.”
“Well,” the director interrupts. “There’s another location the client’s interested in. Sorry we didn’t have time to connect before this meeting, Stella.”
Stella cocks her head and crinkles her forehead, clearly confused, and looking more than a little annoyed. “Another location? I don’t think we have time to add another?—”
“Ethan and I had a conversation late last night with the producer.”
“Ohhh-kay.” Stella glances at me, then Tessa, who looks just as surprised.
Uh-oh. Hope I didn’t screw this up. Maybe going behind her back wasn’t the best idea? Well. Too late to change things now.
“We’re going to shoot the commercial on the Isle of Skye,” I jump in.
We lock eyes. The room falls away.
“The Cuillin ranges are a favorite hiking area, a place to reconnect with nature and the rugged beauty of Scotland. Of the entire United Kingdom, really.” Somehow, I sound steady and confident. What’s she thinking? She kind of looks like she’s going to cry. Or scream. Hard to tell. “We want the commercial to be impactful, but also have a good story behind it, not cheat with a pseudo-mountain.” I soften the word cheat. It’s not an accusation, it’s a reminder.
Was this a mistake?Too personal at her place of work? The woman doesn’t even want my help, not really, and now I’m forcing her to go to the place her great-aunt was also trying to force her to go to?
But this isn’t just about Stella. It’s about me, too. Ever since she told me about the Skye bucket list item, I’ve had a reel of memories running through my head from when my mum took me there. Maybe it’d be a magical place for me, too. Maybe I’d find some peace around my mum’s death and my whole fucked-up childhood. Some closure.
Stella nods once. “Okay. But I’m not sure it’s in the budget.” Her voice is soft, breathless.
“I ran the numbers. We can do it.” One of the corporate sponsors made an additional contribution last week that would cover the increased costs.Fate.
I keep talking before I chicken out, or forget important details, or pass out from the tension in the air between me and Stella.
“Two of the kids I coach, Leo and Callum, are going to be the rugby players in the commercial. And if you think it’s a good idea, we can have Izzy be one of the girls. The one we interview.”
She gasps softly, her shoulders raising with the breath. “I think that’d be amazing for her.” Stella’s eyes are still locked with mine.
“Wonderful. It’s decided then. The shoot will be on the Isle of Skye next week. I won’t be able to attend myself, but Stella will represent the account team.” Tessa smiles like we just solved world hunger. “Chloe’s going to take you through the adult talent options next.”
I wish I knew what Stella was thinking. She looks so far away right now.I did that. Is it good? Bad? Did I overstep incredibly? I don’t think Stella hears any of the conversation that’s happening around us. I’m nodding and giving my alignment. But Stella? She’s in another world.
My mind fixates on the way it felt to have Stella in my arms. I imagine a world where I can kiss her whenever I want and there’s no Ben complication. A world where I don’t have to pull back from the warm feelings that fill my body every time I’m around her.
I’m getting in too deep, and I know it.
22
STELLA
BUCKET LIST DAY 15
Ican’t remember the last time a person did something like this for me. Maybe it was back in my twenties when Aunt Evelyn showed up in New York City for that Broadway show to comfort me after Hunter broke my heart.
The door clicks shut behind Tessa and Chloe. Alone with Ethan, I keep my eyes trained on the exit. I can’t look at him yet. Ethan, who seems to understandEvelyn and her intentions with the list. Who is concerned about me getting it done in a way that I can live with myself. Who wants me to succeed, because he thinks Evelyn saw the best version of me, one I didn’t even know was there, and he wishes his mom had seen that in him.
Warmth creeps up from my core to my neck, burning my cheeks. I shift in my chair, feeling like it’s on fire, like I’m on fire. There’s so much swirling inside me right now, dynamite being thrown at a campfire, about to explode. I hate it. I love it. It’s the worst feeling. The best feeling? Dammit.
I’m not falling for Ethan Fraser, am I?
