Page 23 of Hostile Cravings
“That’s it?” she asked, sitting back.
“That’s it. We pretend that didn’t happen, but we test this not insulting each other thing out for the night. Just two people enjoying a movie together.”
Her eyes creased. “You’re going with that?”
“What do you want me to go with?” I asked, thinking I’d read her wrong and worried that if she told me what she really wanted, I’d act on it because my body was aching to take her. I wasn’t sure if that’s all I wanted though and suspected that if I gave in before we both figured out what was happening that it would drive a gulf between us we’d never be able to cross. One that would spoil what we had. The thought of not hearing her throw her insults at me, of not seeing those brown eyes roll when I entered a room, of not seeing her flaunt her sexy body in front of me and covering the action up with foul-mouthed words and dirty looks, was painful.
She studied me for a moment, chewing her bottom lip before she flopped back and turned the TV on. “I want to watch a movie and pretend your tongue wasn’t just flirting with mine. Pretend we’re friends, not enemies who just slipped up.”
“Sounds good to me,” I said with a relieved sigh and putting my arms behind my head. “But none of that mushy romance shit.”
“Eww, I hate those movies.”
I glanced at her.
“What? That shit is nothing but lies,” she said. “There’snothing like that out there. Nothing but sex and loss. True love like that doesn’t exist.”
My brows furrowed as I thought about how to respond. I knew love like those movies portrayed existed. I’d seen what it had done to Riley, how it had eaten her alive until she returned to Greyson and came back to life. Had seen it in Mason and my sister, the way the two of them looked at each other. I’d known Mason since we were kids and that look was one I’d never seen. And I’d seen it in my parents. How my father looked at my mother like she was his world. How he’d grab her randomly and kiss her as if he feared losing her. How his death had destroyed her, leaving her a shell of the woman she was when she was with him.
That’s why I wondered what had happened to Angie to make her think that. Or what hadn’t happened. Had she never been in love? I had when I was young, but it had been a very long time since I’d let myself get that close to a woman and what I’d had then didn’t come close to what I knew was possible.
“So what do you want to watch if sappy love stories are out? Porn?”
She shot me a dirty look and smacked my arm with the remote.
Shrugging, I said, “It was worth a try.”
“You’re gross, and if we weren’t calling a truce, I’d call you a few choice words.”
“Go for it. I miss your insults,” I joked.
“Dirty old man.”
“That’s better, little viper. I’m not complete if you’re not spewing nasty remarks.”
Her giggle caused a tightening in my chest and the sensation disturbed me. I turned back, watching as she picked a violent action movie and settled back in the bed.
“That’s what you pick?” I asked. “You live that life and you want to watch it in a movie?”
“I don’t live it. I hate violence, that’s Tony’s thing.”
“Says the woman who bashed a man’s brains in with a brick.” I shook my head, remembering how impressed I’d been when I’d found out she’d been the one to annihilate the guy so badly there was no part of his head left.
“He was a prick who deserved it.”
“Remind me not to get on your bad side that much,” I muttered.
“You won’t,” she answered, and I stretched my arm, sliding it behind her and pulling her into my chest. “Tyson?”
“Shush, wife. Happy couple, remember? They do things like this, so just go with it.”
She relaxed, snuggling into my chest, her hand resting on my waist, and I couldn’t help but think it seemed like my body had been waiting for her to fill that space. I let the thought go, intent on enjoying the peace between us for a few hours before we replaced it with the mask of indifference and spite we carried regularly.
Angie was curled into me,our bodies tangled, my arms holding her protectively as we slept face to face. Unsure what to think about it, I laid there, observing how peaceful she was, her features soft, her mouth slightly open. She was beautiful and I could have laid there looking at her all day. Rubbing my eyes, I slowly disentangled myself from her, finally unfolding her long fingers from where they’d wrapped around my shirt. Rising, I looked down at her, seeing how she moved further into my spot as if seeking my body.
The sight sent that strange fluttering in my chest again and I cursed it, turning from her and grabbing clean clothes from my bag. I never let a woman sleep overnight. I took what I needed andsent them home or didn’t bother bringing them home, taking them wherever I found them. But never did I spend the night with them, holding them or letting there be any more than sex between us.
I tried telling myself it was part of the sham, the fake marriage dictating that we act like a couple, do the normal things couples did. But my arguments weren’t convincing enough. Angie was still sleeping when I emerged from the bathroom, so I left her there, nodding to Finch who was on duty outside our door and hearing him call Kimble, who emerged from the room next door just as I was passing it. Always tailing me, always on guard. There was never a time we didn’t have our men with us, never a time we were truly alone. It was part of the business that took some getting used to, but death was always on the horizon, waiting to take us when we least expected.
