Page 101 of The Love of Our Lives
I think less about the gloom of it all these days too – because what’s the point? There is so much joy to be had, so many amazing experiences right on our doorstep. I’d be a fool to stop now. And just maybe, I can inspire someone else along the way. Maybe I can help them far more by living my life well.
By following my heart.
The other guests start to appear – some of whom I assume must be from Ruth’s family, and another man with blond hair who I realise I recognise – and I feel warm inside when I see who it is. William’s nephew and niece, who I saw once in a photograph, here to celebrate his big day.
He must have reached out to them, just as I’d suggested. Just as Emily must have done too.
I keep snapping away, heart thumping now, as Zoe walks in with her purple hair pulled up into a pretty bun, violets threaded through it, then someone else from dancing appears, and finally, I see a figure down my lens in a black shirt and jeans – a person I haven’t seen in a while. Broad shoulders, dark hair, forest-green eyes I wouldn’t be able to forget in a million lifetimes.
Adam.
And he is walking up to Charlie and William with that lopsided smile, then reaching in to give him a big hug.
My heart catches in my chest as my finger hovers on the button, and a second later, he turns towards my lens, and I lower it.
A strange moment passes between us, a look I can’t quite read, and then he’s saying something to William before walking slowly across to me.
‘Hello again,’ he says.
‘Hello,’ I smile, even though my insides are aching.
‘So,’ he says, ‘thank you for doing this all for William.’
‘It was no trouble; it’s good experience for me. And I love this place,’ I say, glancing about myself, at the trees, and the sky above.
I look back down to see him eyeing me quizzically.
‘Everything OK?’
‘I’m sorry,’ he says, shaking his head, ‘I had the oddest feeling the first time we met that I’d seen you before, and then I just got it again there. So, I thought I’d be that weirdo that actually tells you.’
I laugh, a bright feeling exploding inside.
‘Perhaps we have, in another life.’
He looks at me curiously again.
Just at that moment, Dee appears with what must be the cake, and we both turn to see Ruth with her two daughters exclaiming over it.
‘I suppose that’s your cue,’ Adam says, almost reluctantly.
‘I suppose it is,’ I say, lifting my camera up again. Then with a smile, I start to walk in Dee’s direction, thinking to myself that that wasn’t bad all considering, and perhaps I can finally go on my way now, knowing that someone like Adam is still out there in the world; someone as amazing as him. It is probably far too much to take on – her heart being in my body and everything. Far too many obstacles surely and there’s no way it could possibly work out. As I pass by the radio Charlie turned on, though, a note hits my ear, a joyful sound, and I find myself turning to see him still standing where I left him. Watching me go.
And then I remember what William said; that just because Adam loved someone else before, doesn’t mean he didn’t love me just as much.
Without another thought in my head, I run quickly back across, camera in hand.
Standing in front of him, I’m sure I see him take a breath in.
‘If you’re not doing anything later,’ I say, my voice slightly breathless, ‘do you fancy maybe doing something, together I mean? We could grab a coffee, or a drink, or, I dunno, just take a walk somewhere?’
For a moment, I think he’s going to say no. He just stands there like he’s considering the question. And maybe there was a time where I would have felt embarrassed about this whole thing, regretted saying anything at all. But everything is different now. And just because something is scary, and may never work out, doesn’t mean it’s not worth a shot. Isn’t it better to at least try?
While I’m here.
A second later, a smile starts on his face, a spark.
He takes a breath in; nods like he’s landed on a decision.
‘All right, Maggie the photographer,’ he says. ‘How about a coffee then, after all of this? We could take a walk somewhere. You game?’
And as my heart leaps from my chest – twice – I say,
‘I’m game.’
