Page 76 of Sad Girl Hours
“I hope she’s doing all right and the family stuff isn’t anything too difficult. It would be lovely to have her. Make sure you tell her that,” Xander says.
“Of course. I’ll definitely tell her. Well, I’d better go and let you get back to whatever you’re doing.”
“I’m trying to make stifado like my yiayia used to make,” Xander says, “but it’s not going very well.”
“And I’m slicing oranges to make some new garlands because the animals, including – I suspect – your ginormous hunk of a cat, keep tearing them down.”
“Any more accusations like that and Beanie will be forced to get his lawyers involved,” Nell says. “He is a perfect little angel boy who has never done anything wrong in his life.”
“He’s animperfect ginormous devil boy actually, but I will stop talking because I wouldn’t put it past the bastard to actually have lawyers.”
“Very wise. See you soon!”
“All right, darling, love you.”
“Mwah, mwah!”
She presses end call. “See? I’m so sorry. I know that was really stressful for you at the start, but I wanted you to know how loved you are and how welcome you’d be. So, what do you say?”
I feel warm, just from listening to that snapshot of their family life, and from the fact that they want me to be part of it for a little while.
“I’m running out of reasons to say no,” I say, trying not to let myself want it too badly.
“Then say yes,” Nell says. “Please.”
She says the word in such a way as to suggest that it’d be a favour toherand not to me. I’ve rarely felt this cared about.
No. I’veneverfelt this cared about.
I feel a smile quirk at my lips before edging tentatively across my face for real, and I think I’d do pretty much anything if Nell said please.
“Yes.”
Chapter Thirty-seven
Nell
I am in trouble.
I didn’t hesitate to ask Saffron if she’d spend Christmas with me because of course I want her to, and I definitely don’t want her to have to go back and be with her parents and risk her mental health. But…
I felt it.
Up on the Ferris wheel, when she cracked that perfect, radiant fucking smile and said yes, I felt it.All of it.
She’s been so open with me, I finally feel like Iknowher. Not just the shiny Saffron facade but the whole person, and I love her even more for it.
I’d never felt closer to her when she smiled at me then, all pink and a little breathless from the cold.
And, incidentally, I also wanted to lean forward and kiss her.
And, also incidentally, I pictured doing just that later that night. It would be gentle at first, soft and tender so she knew that I meant it, that I wanted it to last, that I’m sticking around long enoughforit to last. And then it wouldn’t be. I’d tangle my fingers in her hair and pull her even closer to me. I’d grip her face with my free hand and feel the line of her jaw. I might even kiss along it.
And then I’d – well. There were quite a few ‘and then’s.
That romantic attraction that has been flickering away inside me, possibly even since the first night we met, has now also beenjoined by a physicalwanting, and I can’t deny the fact that I am almost definitely in love with Saffron.
And I’ve just invited her to stay with me for the best part of three weeks.
