Page 94 of Sad Girl Hours
“I hope it was,” Saffron says. “I hope you got something out of it, even if it didn’t massively help with your writing.”
“You’vehelped with my writing,” I say, thinking of all the poetry I’ve been scrawling down over the last few days. All the poems about getting to know yourself a little better but also just letting all the magic of possibility flow in and out and around you. I doubt I’d have got here without her. “And even if this whole thing hadn’t helped, even indirectly, it would still have been worth it to keep trying to find things that would make you smile.”
She smiles at that, and I beam back. “See. So worth it.”
She fades into shyness. “I don’t know what I did to deserve you.”
“Personally, I don’t think people should have to earn kindness,” I say softly. “But, even if they did, you’ve earned all of this and much, much more besides. Just for the record, I’m continually impressed with you.”
“Shut up,” Saffron says again, laughing softly.
“Iam,” I say, smiling but not letting this pass. “You hold so much inside you, so many difficult things, but instead of letting it twist you into a bitter, angry, negative person – which would be understandable, by the way – you’re always kind and soft and lovely to the people around you. It’s like you let all the negative stuff make you even softer, rather than hardening you to the world. It’s inspiring really.”
I notice that her eyes have developed a shiny quality and clear my throat, readying myself to change the subject so she doesn’tcry and ruin her make-up. “Come on. I’d better get ready so we can get this party started.”
Chapter Forty-five
Nell
The party is indeed hopping downstairs. We spent yesterday making silver and gold paper decorations, and there are balloons hung up everywhere with various exclamations printed on them about New Year. The house soon fills up, people laughing and drinking and dancing, some of us spilling out on to the patio.
Naomi and Owen have some friends from school over and they spend the first two hours of the party trying to convince everyone to watch them do weird gymnastic moves or showing off the tricks they’ve taught the animals to do. Dad tells them that it’s past the hamsters’ bedtime but Naomi just gives him a withering stare and tells him that Pops said once that, in the wild, hamsters are ‘nocturnal not diurnal’, and she picked the hamsters and not the guinea pigs for a reason. Nevertheless, he makes them return all the animals (bar whatever it is that’s squirming in Owen’s pocket) so instead they try to wheedle everyone into playing hide-and-seek with them.
“This is what happens when you let them stay up past their bedtime,” I say wryly to Saffron as we watch Owen tugging on my uncle’s arm.
“That and I saw them both eat an entire box of mini doughnuts earlier,” Saffron adds.
“Oh, good Lord.”
“Yeah. I tried to suggest that maybe they should share, but I’m no match against one of them, never mind both of them at the beginning of a sugar-induced craze.”
“NELL. SAFFY.” Owen appears to have given up on Uncle Roger and is now standing in front of us both, glaring. “Everyone’s beingboring.Will you play hide-and-seek with us?”
“Owen, it’s only an hour until New Year – how are you not exhausted?”
“I’m feeling energised by the prospect of a whole other year to cause trouble in.”
“That and you apparently ate half a box of mini doughnuts earlier.”
His gaze snaps to Saffron, arms crossing over his chest. “SAFFRON.” Oops. She’s getting full named. “You promised you wouldn’t tell.”
Saffron’s eyes narrow but there’s a sparkle in them still. “I don’t remember that. I remember you telling me that snitches got stitches, but I don’t remember promising anything, little man.”
He pauses for a minute, still grumping. “Well, either way I think you owe us. One round of hide-and-seek and then we’ll let you go back to being boring adults just standing around.”
“Excuse m—”
“ONE. TWO. THREE. F—”
“Jesus Christ, OK!” I grab Saffron by the arm and we start running.
“Not over there,” Saffron says, feeling me try to tug her towards the shed. “They found Naomi in there last round.”
“OK… Back in here.” I pull us back towards the house, slipping in the side door off the utility room and sneaking round to the stairs.
We pelt up them, almost running into my great-aunt as she comes out of the bathroom. “Sorry, Aunt Sylvie!” I call, darting round the corner.
“OK, let me think. Aha!”
