Page 10 of In Just a Year
He dropped his head and hit his fist against the wall. How could something so terrible feel as good as that kiss? It was short and fleeting, but he felt as though his entire life had been leading to this moment. To this girl.
“What are you doing?” Esther’s voice came from the direction of the nursery.
Ben pinched his eyes shut. He’d given her a kiss in thenurseryof all places. He could have taken her to the garden in such a lavish house. The library. He could have professed his love and asked for permission to take … but no, he’d waited too long, and now he’d snapped.
She deserved more. Especially Esther. Especially from him, a Klonimus.
Ben sorely wished for magic power, the ability to turn himself transparent to blend in with the wallpaper behind him.
She walked toward him and stopped, inclining her head to force him to look at her.
“Why did you run away?” she asked, familiarity and trust softening her voice.
They were alone in the hallway. Luckily, the children had found another welcome distraction, perhaps treats in the kitchen where friendly servants always had something special ready. Here in the Pearler’s house, even the halls were elegant with damask wallpaper and gas lights making the crystal wall sconces sparkle. And when Ben looked at Esther, her beautiful black hair cascading over her shoulders, the tulle of her girly dress draping over her figure, Ben lost the ability to fight his feelings. He exhaled and gave her a look as if he’d spilled the milk. What could he say to the girl he’d loved for as long as he could remember if he wasn’t sorry for the kiss after all?
He dropped his head. “I shouldn’t have done it.”
“Why not?”
Ben caught the slight wobble in her voice. Oh no, he was making her cry. Wait, what did she say?Why not?
“Why did you run away?” she asked again, blinking at him with those long black lashes. Tears moistened them just enough to make them look darker and longer.
“I didn’t think you’d want me to—”
“I’ve always wanted you … ahem … to kiss me. Oh boy.” She crinkled her nose and rubbed her forehead until a strand of hair fell onto her face.
She said it. It wasn’t just a dream this time. He knew he’d heard her voice. She wanted him—his kiss. And he’d depleted any restraint over the last few months. No, the last few years! His feelings for Esther had strengthened as he’d grown up, and now, the longing to touch her was overpowering.
Ben tucked the loose strand of her silky black hair behind her ear. She caught his gaze. A lifetime of friendship and closeness evaporated, and something else bubbled between them.
A force greater than either of them pushed Ben closer, and there was nothing left within him to resist her beauty. Now that he’d felt what it was like to kiss a girl—to kiss Esther—he was parched for more.
She inhaled softly, and the gorgeous batting of her lashes erased his restraint.
Now or never.
He brought his hand to the back of her head and pulled her closer.
She let him lead her and parted her lips, but before she could gasp, he took her mouth.
He didn’t have the right words but wanted to show her how he felt. He wanted to pour everything into this kiss, all those years of longing, of lying alone in bed and thinking of her sweet laugh, the bounce in her step when she won at a game, and the sparkle of her smile.
She smelled like honeysuckle and elderberries. Like the dew on a cherry waiting to be picked. Ben darted his tongue out, overcome by the need to taste her. And she rewarded him with a light flick of hers. When she exhaled and smiled, her pretty white teeth felt cool against his lips but her aura hotter than flames.
She granted him access.
He was kissing Esther.
Esther Solomon.
The idea was greater than he could grasp, and the sensation of closeness rushed through him even more. Until now, he’d been one of the brothers, one of the Jews, one of many students at university. And she’d been one of the Solomons, one of the girls, one of the Jews. Yet at this moment, together and united, their energy shifted the world around them, and Ben knew everything would change.
His body tightened as he cupped her cheek with the hand that had been at the back of her head and wrapped his other arm around her waist. She propped her back against the wall, mouth open and receptive.
Ben wasn’t sure what to do; he just wanted to continue. More and more, he needed to deepen the kiss and take her mouth, or else he’d perish on the spot. With a desperation and urgency he’d never experienced before—for it was his first real kiss and surely hers, too—Ben followed his heart. He communicated how desperately he wanted her and that nothing could stand between them.
“Benny!” a voice came from downstairs. “Benny?” Gideon. “Ben!” His oldest brother’s voice came closer.
