Page 41 of Saved by my Baby Daddy Spy
A few minutes later, there is a knock at the door. I glance through the peephole before opening it and letting Holden inside. He gives me a smile that makes butterflies erupt in my stomach.
“Alright, who is being difficult for her mama?” Holden asks as Kerrigan stretches out her little arms to him.
Holden takes her and cuddles her close, her sobbing coming to a stop as she buries her face in his chest.
Heat pools in my core at the sight of him holding our daughter. There is something about a man who is good with children that turns me on. Holden grins at me over her head as he sways back and forth with Kerrigan in his arms.
“Why don’t you go get some rest?” Holden hums and sways a little slower with her. “I’ve got this for a little bit. I might even be able to get her back to bed.”
“Actually, I have a little bit of work to do. Are you sure that you don’t mind watching over her? I have to get the next five thousand words done tonight and so far, I’m sitting at zero.”
“Go get some work done then. I got this from here.”
For a moment, I consider staying with him as he kicks off his shoes before flopping down onto the couch. He holds Kerrigan against his chest. She wipes her face on his chest before closing her eyes.
It would be so easy to sit down with them and relax, but instead I head back to my room to get some work done.
The sun is starting to rise when I finally finish the work I had to get done. Ever since Holden got here, Kerrigan has been quiet. There is no shrieking or crying that I’ve been able to hear.
A little bit of jealousy crawls through me at the thought that he was able to calm her when I couldn’t.
I yawn and stretch as I walk out of my room and check Kerrigan’s bedroom. The bed is empty and the blankets are in the same place I left them when I got her last.
I make my way out into the living room to find Kerrigan and Holden sleeping on the couch, wrapped in each other’s arms. My heart melts as I look at the pair.
He already loves her more than I could have ever imagined he would.
As I tiptoe across the room, I’m careful not to make any noise. I don’t want to wake either of them as I pull Kerrigan from Holden’s arms and take her into her room. She shifts in my arms slightly, but doesn’t wake as I put her onto her mattress.
For a few seconds, I watch her before sneaking out of her room and shutting the door.
“Found this in the cushions,” Holden says, his voice husky with sleep as he hands me my phone.
I pull up the baby monitor up and set it on the coffee table. “Thank you for coming tonight. I don’t know what I would have done without you. Normally I can get her to settle down, but tonight she wasn’t having it.”
Holden yawns and slings his arm over the back of the couch as I sit down in one of the plush armchairs. “The sun is coming up. Did you get all the writing done that you needed to do? If not, I can stay here for a little while longer.”
“I got it all done, but you can still stay here longer if you want. Maybe you could stay until she wakes up. I’m sure that she would love to have you here for breakfast. She really is attached to you.”
Holden smiles, his gaze distant. “She’s great. Honestly, I didn’t know that it was possible to love another person that much, but when I look in her eyes, I know that I would use you as a human shield if it meant protecting her.”
I laugh and tuck my legs up beneath me. “I think we’re going to be fighting over who is using whom as a human shield.”
Holden looks over at me, his gaze searching my face. “How are you feeling about all of this? I’ve never really asked.”
“Where do you want me to start?” My heart pounds against my chest. I don’t know how much I want to tell him about how I’m feeling.
This entire situation is something I didn’t think I would ever be in, but now that I am, I have mixed feelings about everything.
He purses his lips for a moment, twisting slightly to face me. “Tell me everything.”
“Well, I was pissed and I was hurt when I woke up at the hospital and you weren’t there. I didn’t think that anything was going to happen between us, but you could have been a decent person and said goodbye.”
Holden nods, looking guilty. He rubs at something on his arm while looking at the ground. When he looks back at me, I can see the regret in his eyes.
“I should have said goodbye, but I thought it was easier to just leave. I brought you into a bunch of shit that you didn’t need. I couldn’t imagine sticking around and putting you through anything else.”
“I can understand that, but an explanation at the time would have been better. Especially when I found out a couple months later that I was going to be having your child.”
