Page 13 of Sinner
“Caterina.” He says my name without turning, as if he’s sensed my presence. When he finally faces me, his blue eyes widen at my disheveled state. “You’re soaked. What are you doing here so late?”
“What does it look like?” My voice cracks. “I’m falling apart.”
He reaches for a clean linen cloth, stepping toward me. “Here, let me?—”
“Don’t.” I step back, wrapping my arms around myself. “Don’t pretend to care now.”
His hand falls to his side. “Of course I care. I’ve always?—”
“No.” The word erupts from me, sharper than I intended. “If you cared, you would have done something. Said something. Instead, you hide behind your collar while I’m being sold off like some medieval bride.”
Nico’s jaw tightens. “That’s not fair. You know my position?—”
“Your position?” I laugh, the sound brittle in the sacred space. “Your position is a choice, Nico. A choice you make every day.”
“It’s not that simple.” He runs a hand through his salt-and-pepper hair. “My vows?—”
“Your vows.” I step closer, close enough to smell the sandalwood soap on his skin. “What about the vows I’m about to take? To a man who sees me as property? Who won’t take no for an answer as soon as he puts his ring on me.”
Something dark flashes across Nico’s face. “Has he hurt you?”
“Not in ways that leave bruises.” My voice drops to a whisper. “But he will. Everyone knows what he is, what his family does.”
Nico moves to the table, gripping its edge until his knuckles whiten. “Your father approved the match. The families?—”
“Stop hiding behind excuses!” The tears come now, hot and unstoppable. “Behind God, behind my father, behind your collar. You’re a coward, Nico Moretti.”
He turns, eyes flashing. “You think this is easy for me? Watching you with him? Knowing what’s coming?”
“Then stop it!” I slam my palm against his chest. “Do something! Fight for me! For us!”
“There is no us, Caterina!” His voice rises, echoing off the stone walls. “There can’t be!”
“Because you won’t allow it,” I hiss, pushing him again. “Because you’re too afraid to admit what you feel when you look at me.”
His breathing quickens. “You don’t know what you’re asking.”
“I know exactly what I’m asking.” I step closer, tilting my face up to his. “I’m asking you to be honest. Just once. Tell me you don’t think about me. Tell me you don’t want me.”
“Caterina.” My name is a warning on his lips.
“Tell me,” I press my palm against his chest, feeling his heart hammering beneath the black fabric, “that you don’t love me.”
Something snaps in him. His eyes darken, pupils dilating as his control shatters. In one fluid motion, he grabs my wrists, spinning me until my back hits the vestry wall. The impact knocks the breath from my lungs.
“Is this what you want?” His voice is rough, unrecognizable. “To make me break every vow I’ve ever taken? To destroy everything I’ve built?”
I meet his gaze unflinchingly. “I want the truth.”
“The truth?” He leans closer, his breath hot against my cheek. “The truth is, I’ve spent weeks in agony. The truth is, I can’t sleep without seeing your face. The truth is I’ve begged God to take these feelings from me, and instead, they grow stronger every day.”
His confession hangs in the air between us, the final barrier crumbling.
“Nico,” I breathe his name, reaching up to touch his face.
When our lips meet, it’s like a match striking gasoline. His mouth claims mine with desperate hunger, months of restraint evaporating in an instant. I gasp as he presses me harder against the wall, his large hands sliding down my sides to grip my hips.
The kiss deepens, turns savage with need. My fingers fumble with the buttons of Nico’s shirt as his mouth trails fire down myneck. The white collar brushes against my skin, a reminder of what we’re desecrating, making it somehow more intoxicating.
