Page 57 of The Mountain
“What Liam isn’t telling you is that he and Matty were basically heroes.” He presses a kiss to the side of her cheek, then freezes, giving a choked sound of amusement at the sight of some stranger watching on. “Oh, hi there, Mari’s mum. Jackie, right? Good to see you again.”
He releases his hold on Lily, then gives the woman a sheepish grin, probably meaning to look contrite and failing spectacularly. “Sorry. We’re interrupting your lesson, aren’t we?”
The woman—Jackie—rolls her eyes, and gives a dismissive wave. “Not at all. Lily had just been threatening me with a black diamond run, so you’ve all probably saved me from embarrassing myself.”
Seth takes advantage of Eddie’s distraction to sidle up to Lily, his thick arms wrapping around her narrow shoulders, until she’s practically disappearing in his snowboard coat. “I’m sorry I didn’t answer my phone.” He presses his cheek against the top of her head, his eyes rimmed with pain and exhaustion. “I hate knowing that you worried.”
“Heroes?” Lily asks, catching on Eddie’s earlier statement. She peers up at Seth, then glances at me and Matty. “What does Eddie mean? What happened?”
“I wasn’t a hero,” Matty mutters, dragging one trembling hand down his face. All the confidence and power from earlier is gone, drained out of him like snowmelt down the mountainside. “It was just luck.”
“The fuck it was,” Eddie retorts, then winces, shooting Jackie another sheepish look. “You saved those guys’ lives, Matty.”
Matty makes a choked sound as he gives his head a slow shake.
“So you guys are all Lily’s boyfriends?” Jackie muses. Her lips quirk up in a smile that has me wondering whether she’s just teasing Lily, or whether she actually knows about us.
I stiffen, my brow dipping, heart skipping a beat in my chest. I’d only just come to terms with being out where Antoine is concerned. I mean, I hadn’t made some social media declaration that I’m bi or pan or whatever, but I stopped caring what those people think years ago. When I broke my spine and the sponsorships dried up and the fans—who’d once filled my inbox with questions about training and contacts and opportunities—had disappeared like snowflakes on the wind.
I hadn’t thought about what it would mean to come out as poly or whatever we are.
I cringe, thinking of yesterday, when I’d stood next to Antoine and felt the burn of that old man’s scorn when he’d refused to sell us condoms. How much more of that will we have to face, the six of us together?
But Jackie’s smile is kind, with no harsh judgment or disgust.
“Lily, how would you feel about having them join us for lunch?” Jackie asks. “Youweregoing to let me take a break, right? Or was it your plan to make me snowboard until I collapsed with fatigue?”
Lily gives a nervous laugh, pulling free from Seth’s embrace and wrapping one arm around herself instead, as if she still needs the comfort of being held. I frown. It should be my arms around her.
“That… that would be nice. Thanks.” She takes a steadying breath, then straightens, cocking her head to give Jackie a wobbly smile. “I don’t think there’s a Michelin-starred restaurant here, though. You’re probably going to have tomake do with eating something mass-produced, deep-fried, and possibly from a food warmer. Just so you know.”
Jackie gives a dramatic shudder, making Lily laugh, a rasping laugh that is still thick with tension. “Well, I guess it’s either that or starvation.” Jackie gives a resigned sigh, then turns to look at us, gaze sharp and assessing. I feel myself going still when her eyes land on me. “Let me treat you boys to lunch. And in exchange, I want to hear all about what happened.”
The Canyons,it turns out, does have a proper restaurant, saving Lily’s student the indignity of having to eat pizza by the slice from a food warmer. Lily and Jackie listen, rapt and silent as Eddie and Seth take turns describing the events leading up to the avalanche, the avalanche itself and—as Eddie put it—the rescue mission.
I listen in silence, pretending to focus on cutting my steak while stealing glances at Antoine and Matty. Antoine’s brow is furrowed, lips pressed together with worry. The same expression he’s worn since his mother called him yesterday. Matty looks like he might be sick, his knuckles white as he grips his fork, jaw working as he struggles to chew through the roast chicken on his plate.
“…and then Matty just dropped down into there, completely fearless…” Eddie’s eyes flash with excitement, his hands waving wildly. “It was like he had x-ray vision or something, the way he found where the first guy was buried, and just dug him out…”
Matty’s fork clatters against his plate. He clears his throat and studiously avoids everyone’s gaze as they turn to look at him. “Itwas just luck,” he mutters, pale eyelashes fluttering as he shoots me a beseeching look. “Liam was the one who actually knew what he was doing.”
I scrub at my face and try to ignore the way those words sharpen the stab of guilt in my chest.
I was theonlyone who knew what I was doing, and they’d trusted me, these guys. Lily too, the last time we’d ridden backcountry. I knew it was risky to go out there without beacons and transceivers. Knew we should have had probes and shovels. I should have at least given them basic avalanche training.
“It was bloody stupid to go out unprepared,” I say, looking at Lily. “The only reason those guys aren’t still buried in the snow right now is because Matty miraculously found one of them and every single one of them all had transceivers. Good ones too. Even then, it was a pretty close thing, to be honest. We might not have gotten them all out if ski patrol hadn’t arrived to help dig.”
Lily’s face pales, eyes going wide, her hands stilling beside her plate. I lift my chin and plow on. There’s no point in sugarcoating it.
“If it had been us, they wouldn’t have found our bodies until spring.”
Lily lets out a pained whimper, her lower lip trembling. Beside her, Seth clutches her hand and shoots me a reprimanding look. I ignore it, turning instead to look at Matty. Because he’s the least experienced of all of us. And I’d been his trainer—he’d trusted me the most.
“I knew it was risky taking you guys back there without proper gear. I knew the risks and I told you guys it would be fine…” I flinch as my back twinges with remembered pain. I’d taken a riskthat day too. But then, it had only been me who paid the price. “I’m sorry.” The words come out in a rasp. “I’m really sorry.”
Antoine grasps my hand, squeezing it in silent support that I don’t deserve.
“That’s okay.” Matty gives me a wobbly smile, his gaze dipping to where Antoine’s hand covers my own, then to my face. “It’s not your fault. We knew it was dangerous…” He gives a mirthless chuckle, then adds, “I mean, there’s a sign at the gate. With a skull and crossbones and everything. We’d have to be idiots to think there wasn’t a risk.”
