Page 5 of My Secret Duke
Olivia opened her mouth to agree with him, but her need for honesty betrayed her. “Not completely. I am impulsive, a character trait I am working hard to correct. It will not happen again.”
“I want to—”
But she didn’t let him finish. “You are engaged,” she blurted out, feeling the heat in her cheeks. “At least my brother told me that you are. If it is true, then it makes your behavior reprehensible as well as reckless, and I would never have spent time alone in your company if I had known.”
“I’m not engaged,” he assured her in a firm voice. “Lady Annette and I are friends. She is like a sister to me. We were never engaged, and I have spoken to her since that night, and she is perfectly happy not to be engaged to me. Ever. There was a hope, I admit, but it was in the minds of our mothers. Some schoolgirl desire to see our two families united.”
He spoke with distaste.
“Perhaps you should have made that clear to your family and hers, before the gossipmongers began to believe it,” Olivia replied sharply.
His usually smiling mouth turned down and she sawthat there were shadows under his eyes too. He looked serious and oddly uncertain. “You are right, and I was remiss. Again, I apologize. I assure you, I am not engaged. There is no one who holds such a promise from me.” He took another step closer and reached out, as if to take her hands in his. Quickly, childishly, she tucked them behind her back.
He frowned. “I had hoped we were friends too.”
Olivia spoke angrily. “Would a friend risk the reputation of a single young woman during her first London Season? Would a friend be so careless as to make a wager for a kiss?”
He bit his lip, and then tugged at the ring on his thumb. “You should have this. If we had not been interrupted, you would have won the game.”
She stared at him in amazement, and her voice trembled in fury. “I was losing, as you very well know. I don’t want your ring. Is that why you are here? To speak of that silly wager? When I cannot leave the house for fear of being whispered about or being depicted as a brainless flirt in one of those detestable gossip rags. I am an object of derision and pity, and you want to speak ofthat?”
He was silent, watching her warily, as if he thought she might explode all over him. “You have quite a temper, Olivia,” he said at last. “I can’t remember the last time I was abused like this. Perhaps at school when I failed the Latin test.”
He was joking. Even now, he was making fun of her. Olivia turned and strode to the window, only to turn around and face him again. “Please go. There is no reason for you to be here. If you were a gentleman…”
That stung him. The amused glimmer in his eyes was gone. “Iama gentleman. A single gentleman with no impediments, and that being the case, I am here tocorrect this situation, which is entirely of my own making. I enjoy your company, Olivia, and I think you enjoy mine. Your birth is not as exemplary as one might wish, but that is hardly your fault. I am sure there are a great many persons whose pasts are riddled with scandal, my own family included. Looked at in that light, ours is a match made in heaven.”
She blinked. Did she understand his meaning? Could he be making a declaration? A kernel of warmth flared inside her, and for a moment, she was ablaze with joy. Until she remembered Ivo had thoughtlessly dragged her onto one scandal—yes, it had been her fault too, but she was young and inexperienced, and he was not. He said he was her friend, but he had not behaved like one. And now he wanted to marry herdespiteher unfortunate birth? And then what? They could be disgraceful together?
Her attraction to him gave him the potential to damage her beyond recovery. Olivia had already made up her mind about her future. The misery of her childhood at Grantham, the shock of being rejected by the society she had just begun to be a part of. She was tired of being on the outside, and if she was given another chance to step into the heady world of the ton, then she would snatch it up and hold on tight. No longer would she allow others to treat her with contempt or whisper behind her back. If she had her way, they would not dare. She would be like the phoenix rising anew from the ashes of the past.
Unaware of her profound thoughts, Ivo smiled at her. “Come, Olivia,” he coaxed. “You know I’m right. Imagine what fun we could have together, cocking a snook at those gossips you are so worried about. Wouldn’t you enjoy that?”
Did he really believe that? She said quietly, “Doesn’tit concern you to be the subject of their gossip? When they talk about your curricle races, or the time you jumped into the Thames, or…” She tried to recall some of the more lurid stories about him she had heard.
He laughed. “How many times I could persuade Lady Edeline to dance with me in one evening? Four times, and her father was not happy.”
Suddenly stricken, she wondered if he had made a similar bet about her. Her face must have betrayed the thought, because he spoke quickly.
“No, no, I assure you, that was not something I would do to you. Dancing with you was a pleasure, Olivia.”
She swallowed. “Have you never considered employing more sober habits?”
“Sober habits?” He frowned, genuinely puzzled. “Why would I? I don’t drink to excess.”
“I meant… You do not seem to care how thoughtlessly you behave, and how it will affect those around you. Have you never stopped andthoughtbefore you acted, Ivo?”
He shook his head, and his frown deepened. “Life is to be enjoyed. If I stopped and thought about everything I did before I did it… What a tedious idea! Do you know I rescued a kitten last week? The mother cat had hidden herself away in the attic to have her brood, and this one had wandered up onto the roof. I climbed up and brought it down to her. I suppose if I had thought about it, I would have left it up there to starve rather than risk my neck.”
“You’re being ridiculous! That’s not what…” Olivia’s voice grew shaky. “Can’t you see that I could never rely on you?”
“I am punctual to a fault!”
Was he joking, or did he genuinely not understand? Either way, any chance of Olivia accepting his proposaldied at that moment. “No,” she said. “Your actions make it impossible for me to consider your offer. My answer is no, Your Grace.”
The puzzled expression was back, as if he found her emphatic refusal completely beyond his comprehension. “I don’t think you quite understand me. I want to marry you, Olivia.”
“And I don’t want to marry you. In fact, I have no desire to see you again, so please do not call or write or contact me in any way. Is that plain enough?”
