Page 35 of Her Cowboy Baby Daddy
This was going even worse than she’d anticipated in her worst-case scenario contemplations, and she needed to end it. Now.
“Spence, thanks for checking on me. I’m good.” Total lie, but if it got her out of this awkward situation, then she was going with it. “Sorry to hit you with the sperm donor thing. I thought, what with your vagabond ways...” She made a gesture.
“I get it. I just can’t see fathering a child, then moving on.”
“And that’s one of my criteria, so”—she forced a smile—“not a match.”
Spence blew out a breath, then gave her a sidelong look, as if he could get the answers to the questions beating around in his head by reading her mind.
“Why single motherhood?”
Now she let out a breath. “I’m not partner material.”
“How so?”
“Do you know my mom?”
“By reputation only.”
“Need I say more?”
“Maybe you take after your father?”
“Who married my mother?”
“Point taken.”
“I’m twenty-eight years old. There’s a history of fertility issues in the family and according to my doctor, I’m looking at a ticking clock. I want children. I’ve thought this out, Spence.”
He lifted his palms as if warding off criticism. “I’m sure you have, Hayley. You’re a thinker.”
“Thank you?”
“It was a compliment,” he affirmed before lowering his gaze to his boots.
“The old me wants to apologize for asking. The new me says to take the hit and move on. I appreciate all the help you’ve given me, Spence.”
He met her gaze in a serious way. “You still need help on the ranch. I heard that Andie has a new job.” She didn’t answer and he said, “I may not be on board for... donating... but I’m your friend, and I won’t leave you high and dry.”
Your friend.
In spite of being on fire with embarrassment, the words touched her. She wondered if they were true.
“What about your ranch?”
“Henry’s working until the end of the month. I’ll be done by then.”
“You’d make more money taking welding contracts.”
“But I wouldn’t be close to home in case I am needed.” He settled his hands on Hayley’s shoulders.
“So, no to baby daddy. Yes, to ranch work.” No easy task to speak as if she wasn’t mortified, but all things considered, she was holding her own. Of course, she’d melt into a puddle of humiliation after Spence left.
“That sums it up.” He started to lift his hand, hesitated, then touched her, tipping up her chin with his thumb and forefinger so that their gazes met and held even after he dropped his hand. “I can’t have a child in this world that I have no say about.”
“I get it.” She did. She’d feel the exact same way. Why had she thought that Spence would feel differently? “I guess the very qualities that made you my number one choice also take you out of the running.”
“I’m honored to be your number one choice.”
