Page 62 of Any Given Lifetime
Neil sighed. He was trapped. There was no way he was going to get out of it. If Joshua couldn’t be distracted by his lingering jealousy of Derek, then he wasn’t going to be distracted at all.
Unless….
Neil started to kiss his way down Joshua’s body, heading for his cock, when Joshua shoved him away. “Ugh. No. Enough sex.”
Joshua climbed out of bed, calling over his shoulder, “I’m going to shower. You arrange something with your mother.”
Alice sat bythe window of the diner with the menu clenched tightly in her hands. She wasn’t hungry at all. She was far too excited and nervous to think about food.
She glanced down at the picture of Neil’s usual order—veggie burger, fries, onion rings, and a strawberry milkshake. He’d ordered the same thing every time they came since he was five years old, and he’d been able to stuff in the entire meal since he was twelve. She put down the menu and pressed her fingers to her lips.
She felt strangely like everything was coming to an end. Like this was goodbye. Neil had his life back—the one he’d been born searching for, and Alice suddenly realized that she didn’t know how she would fit in now.
Alice opened her purse and got out a mirror, double-checking her face. She wanted to look her best, and she definitely didn’t want to embarrass Neil. She analyzed the small wrinkles around her eyes and the deeper ones around her mouth.
She was looking so much older lately. Neil had insisted that she stop working so much, but she hated taking his money. Of course, he wouldn’t take no for an answer and had started wiring it directly to her bank account.
She put on a little more lip-gloss and sighed. Neil had tried for years to convince her to use nanite creams to reduce the effects of aging, telling her she needed to stay hot for when he was finally out of her life and she could move on, find a man, and make a ‘real kid.’ Reasoning that did nothing but make her angry with Neil for continually making himself out to be a burden on her instead of the most important thing in her life.
But when her vanity had won out, and she’d finally given in, they’d run the requisite tests to make sure her vascular system could handle it, only to find she hadn’t been a candidate anyway. She’d told Neil that it was a good thing she’d refused him all of those years, because the last thing he needed was to blame himself for her death, and she knew that’s what he would’ve done.
Alice closed her eyes and lifted up a small prayer.
When she opened them again, she glanced out the window and saw the most amazing thing: Neil walking next to Joshua Stouder. She’d know the man anywhere after years of seeing photos and videos of him. Neil’s hand was on Joshua’s lower back, guiding him toward the restaurant. For his part, Joshua had his hands stuffed into his jean pockets, and his head was tipped down. Though his eyes were on the sidewalk, a bashful sort of smile dimpled his cheeks.
Alice bit down on her lower lip, a surge of bittersweet joy clenching in her chest.
Joshua said something, and Neil’s face broke into a quick, lightning-bright smile that didn’t disappear right away. Instead, it lingered as a soft curve of his lips. Neil turned his head toward Joshua, who looked back with a shy expression. Then Joshua bumped Neil’s shoulder.
They stopped walking. Neil’s hand came up to Joshua’s cheek, and Joshua, despite being taller and older, somehow seemed younger than Neil, looking at him through his lashes with an uncertain expression. Neil leaned forward and kissed him, full on the mouth, and Joshua kissed him back, pulling away with a grin so bright that Alice felt its reflection on her own face.
Neil gestured toward the restaurant door, and Joshua’s expression flashed apprehensive for a moment, but he nodded, and they turned to enter.
Alice cleared her throat, twisted her napkin in her lap, and then stood up, tossing the napkin on the table. She didn’t know what to do with her body as Neil and Joshua approached.
Neil’s eyes were intense as he gazed at her, full of so much that Alice understood immediately:This is him. He’s everything.
“Mom, this is Joshua.” Neil stood protective and proud, like he was presenting the greatest thing he’d ever accomplished to her.
Alice had never seen him so at home in himself. He was relaxed in his skin, and she suddenly saw the man he would become, and could easily imagine the body he’d grow into over the next few years of his life.
“Mrs. Green,” Joshua said, putting out his hand.
Alice took it immediately and squeezed it. He was beautiful. And looked years younger than her, despite being forty-three to her forty-one. His eyes were a gentle brown that looked at her with respect and hope, and she smiled at him, saying, “Alice, please, Mr. Stouder.”
“Then you have to call me Joshua,” he said.
“Of course, Joshua.” She shook her head in amazement. “I can’t believe it. He’s talked about you since he was just a baby.”
Neil grimaced. “And the embarrassing childhood stories begin. Can’t we sit down and get the food ordered before we start on tales of my diaper years?”
Joshua smiled and put his hand on Neil’s shoulder, shaking him lightly, which didn’t take much effort since Neil was still too thin by Alice’s estimation.
“Ah, come on, Neil, just because you’re like a grumpy old man doesn’t mean you weren’t cute once.”
“What are you talking about? I’m cute now.” Neil huffed, pulling out a chair. “Sit. I’m starving.”
Joshua grinned and looked like he might kiss Neil immediately, but instead sat down in the chair Neil had pulled out for him. Alice retook her seat, grabbing Neil’s hand when he started snapping his fingers in frustration at a waiter.
