Page 45 of Bitter Heat
Janus’s chest tightened at the sorrow in Kerry’s voice.
“I might as well tell you his name,” Kerry said, lowering his gaze again. “Then, you’ll understand.”
Janus waited patiently, trying to remember the way Caleb had given him long moments of quiet while he was recovering, so that he could talk in his own time and when he’d needed it most.
Kerry whispered, “Are you aware of the Monhundy family?”
Janus blinked, staring at Kerry as horror and sudden understanding rushed into him. “You—you mean to tell me…” He almost couldn’t voice the words. “You’re contracted to Wilbet Monhundy?”
The alpha had been found guilty of raping Calitan prostitutes—not just of raping them, but ofbrutalizingthem.
Kerry’s long lashes pressed hard against his cheekbones, a tear slipped from under them and ran down his freckled cheek, as he ducked his chin and nodded.
“Wolf-god.” Janus didn’t know what else to say. His throat clenched tight, and sickness roiled within him.
CHAPTER TWELVE
“Wilbet wasn’t anice man.”
“No. He was not.”
“Still isn’t.”
“No.”
Caleb hadn’t been exaggerating in his letter. Though why Xan and Caleb felt they owed Kerry any more care than another abused omega was still beyond Janus.
It didn’t matter.
Janus tried to clear his head of the anger, disgust, and revulsion that filled it at the idea of Kerry in the hands of a man like that. He struggled to come up with the right thing to say. He had questions, a lot of questions, but he didn’t think he should ask any of them. He thought back to Fan’s insistence that no one could ever really understand an omega’s choice to abort their child, and that the best anyone could offer was unquestioning acceptance. He thought back to his first recuperation, the time that Caleb had cared for him. Remembered the long, open silences. This seemed a similar situation, best handled very carefully, and with as few words as possible.
Janus said nothing but didn’t break his gaze or shift away from Kerry.
“What if he’s like his father?” Kerry whispered, finally disrupting the silence. He touched his stomach with his long, beautiful fingers, sliding them gently over the naked bulge beneath the clear water, and then quickly pulled away as if the skin there burned him. “How will I ever love him?”
The time for words had come. Janus hoped he didn’t say the wrong ones.
“What if he’s like you?” Janus touched Kerry’s chin lightly, feeling the bite of unshaven stubble on his fingertips. “He’s made of you, too, and carried in your womb, and he’ll be fed and nurtured at your chest.”
Kerry blinked at him.
Janus went on. “You’re a strong man, Kerry. So much stronger than an alpha who can’t curb his desires. Your child will be more like you than—”
Kerry jerked his chin away.
“Did I say something wrong?”
“No.” Kerry swiped at his chin with a wet hand as though wiping away Janus’s touch. “But I don’t want you touching me.”
Janus swallowed the hurt. “Apologies. My friends have always been free with each other, and I thought we were becoming friends.”
“Not all friends are affectionate,” Kerry said. “But yes, I’m your friend, or I’d like to be. I think. I don’t know. I just…” He trailed off, shame and despair making his rasp sound like ashes again. “I can’t be touched like that right now. Understand?”
“Oh.” Janus took a slow breath, straining not to reach out again, a new kind of understanding landing hard, like an unexpected slap across the face. “He hurt you.”
“He hurt a lot of people.”
“I know, but…” Janus choked, and he could barely force out the rest. “But he hurt you. Physically.”
