Page 59 of Damian & Jun: Episodes 5-8
Collin paused, then nodded. He bit his lip.
“What’s life like here normally without me?”
“A lot more dynamics, I mean, a lot more dominance and submission. More of our roles.” Collin gave Jun a slow look. “It’s intense. Please don’t be offended. Seeing all of that isn’t something you’ve consented to or even consented to having Damian keep doing, so we’re not going to put that on you.”
“I don’t want Damian to lose all of it though.” Jun started building his own little weird shapes. The pieces were versatile.
“What we do isn’t for everyone. You need to want it, actually need it. It’s not something you do just to make your partner happy. It doesn’t work that way. You have to actually have it inside you.”
“Did you know you had it inside of you when you came?” Jun asked.
Collin shook his head. “No. But I knew I needed help. I knew that I was lonely. I was crashing and burning. Richard stopped me. Damian and Émeric, too. Like, really stopped me. I woke up in a hospital with Émeric sitting next to me. That’s how bad it was. The rest came naturally. I wanted it almost faster than they would give it to me.”
Jun rubbed his fingers over an edge, thinking. “How did you know, though?”
“It felt good. Just touching, it’s amazing. I still can’t get enough of it. And when Richard takes charge, or Émeric ties me up and makes me…makes me give in to him, it’s like all the weight goes away. Sometimes I worry that I’m asking too much of them, that I’m using them, because I want them to take so much from me, but it’s in them to do it. They want it. They get satisfaction in looking after me and pleasure from me allowing them to use me. And honestly, when Master or Sir looks at me like they can’t keep their hands off me…” Collin’s voice trailed off, and he shivered. “It’s one of the best feelings in the world, being wanted like that.”
“I think that’s a little like what I felt when Damian chased me down and when he talks about hunting me down.”
Collin smiled, his eyes soft. “It’s amazing.”
Jun nodded. “Yeah, yeah, it is. But how could it even work though if he’s with all of you, but I’m not? Like, just because Damian wants me, doesn’t mean the rest of you want me.”
Collin fiddled with the puzzle pieces. “I’m not sure. I mean, please don’t feel anything about this, but it’s not like I would not want you. Right now, you’re in the place in my head where I’m not allowed to think about wanting you. And I don’t know if you mean romantically or just kink family or something else. Damian isn’t Émeric’s submissive, but he will interact sexually with Émeric, and I’ve interacted sexually with Damian, but I think of him as a kink brother. I think…I’m not sure, but I think if you played with us, my dynamic with you would be like kink brothers. Damian feels like my older kink brother. I can lean on him if I need to when Richard or Émeric isn’t around, but also sometimes he leans on me, and neither of us are dominant to the other.”
Jun rolled the dynamics around in his head. “So Richard and Émeric are like the grand doms? Grandpa doms. Didn’t you say something like that before?”
Collin snickered. “Émeric would make a great grand dom. He’s all soft and fussy until he starts playing, and then his sadist comes out—and his artist.”
“It’s intense?”
“Very. Not that Richard isn’t either. But Richard is kinda always intense, like nearly the same degree of intense. Émeric can be very intense, though. Years before me, he had a consensual slave; there was a car accident.”
“I’m sorry.”
Collin smiled a little sadly. “I didn’t know him, but Damian and Richard did. They loved him. It’s getting better, but Émeric only recently started to be able to be artistic again. Be careful; if you let him, he’ll probably borrow you from Damian to make art.”
“How so?”
“Like tying us up in artistic shapes and taking photos.”
“I think I’ve seen a little of that kind of art.”
“You’d look beautiful.” Collin smiled and shook his head. “That’s something else we should think about putting in the renovation project, rope display space.”
“Would that be something that I added to The Residency, being…part of things?”
Collin thought the question over. “It could be. But this only works if we’re all offering things that we actually want to share. We have to find roles and give things that are good for us to give.” Collin blushed and stumbled over his words, “When I decided to let my doms use me whenever—when I consented to free use—that was something I was giving everyone else. Sometimes Richard walks in the door, bends me over the couch, and fucks me right there while talking to Damian. One time, Damian held me in place for him. But I like it. I like being needed and wanted that much, that he was thinking about me and planning to grab me as soon as he came home. If I didn’t actually enjoy it, Richard would feel like a terrible person. He wouldn’t do it. He only enjoys it because I also enjoy it. Does that make sense?”
Jun nodded. “Like Damian wouldn’t chase me if he didn’t know that I actually want to get caught.”
“That. All of that.” Collin nodded.
Jun
Jun woke in Damian’s dark bedroom with Damian still slumbering hard beside him. The clock on Damian’s bookshelf told him it was morning. There was a restlessness in his bones. He didn’t want to lie there in the dark. Carefully, Jun rolled to the outer part of the squishy mattress and slithered over the edge. The bruises hurt significantly less now even though they looked worse than ever with the blue and purple turning to ugly browns and greens. All the cuts were fully closed.
He grabbed his paper, phone, and the laptop Damian had given him the evening before, padded down the hallway past Richard, Émeric, and Collin’s room to the lounge, found an open piece of rug, and sat down. Hints of ideas were running through his head, mixed in with the remnants of his dreams, and he wanted to capture them. The picture of his father with his happy family, and Collin talking about The Residency, the way everyone had been laughing during the New Year’s party, all of it was fermenting inside.
