Page 13 of Melt For Us, Daddy
Eyes closed, he tilted his head back under the shower, letting the water soak his hair as a vision of her entered his mind. In it, she was wearing the same strange clothes from the night before. A man’s suit, except it was pink instead of the black he was used to, with a tight-fitting blouse in a darker shade of pink beneath it. Her long blonde hair was pulled up again the way it was last night, instead of in a single braid like the women back home.
Would she be angry if he kept her waiting? The Cordelia in his mind frowned and his heart tripped in his chest. He didn’t want her to be angry with him, and yet…
Something stirred inside him, and his face heated with shame when he realized he was growing hard again. A sinful reaction to a sinful woman. Not only had she been dressed like a man, with far more skin on display than was modest, she’d kissed another woman. Touched her in a familiar way only meant for a man and his wife.
That image, that memory did nothing to quell his growing desire. Or the guilt that sat in his gut like lead.
But even that guilt wasn’t enough to stop him from reaching for that secret part of himself that jutted out like a rod of shame. To stop him from wrapping his fingers around the length and stroking. Gently at first, then harder as the image of Cordelia crystallized in his mind, the creamy skin of her breasts rising with each breath, her calm but stern voice ringing out in his mind.
Eyes on me, Jacob. You don’t look at anyone else. Only me.
That familiar, forbidden pleasure built inside him, coiling tighter and tighter until it snapped, and his shame splattered across the pretty blue tile in front of him.
Weak. Weak and sinful. Trembling slightly, he grabbed a washcloth and scrubbed the tile clean before tossing the cloth in the trash can so that hopefully nobody would ever know what had happened.
Maybe he should go back home. Clearly, being out in the world was poisoning him already and he’d only been away from the church for a day.
But no. Hannah was right. If he returned home without help, without the army he’d promised her, he risked unimaginable pain for his sisters.
So he’d stay. And he’d do everything in his power to fight the temptation the world seemed determined to put in front of him.
Chapter 5
Cordelia
“Have you heard anything from Frankie?” Cordelia asked as she climbed into Holden’s giant SUV.
“Not a peep, but I try not to bother her when I know she’s with the girls.” Pulling away from the curb, he glanced over at her. “Still no word from Ivy?”
“No. And she’s never gone this long without contact. Something's wrong, Holden, and I can’t fix it if she won’t fucking talk to me.”
“What was your fight about?”
“That’s just it. We didn’t really have a fight. Last night she was clearly upset over the Jacob stuff, but she said she was tired so we agreed to talk about it in the morning. Then today she was making breakfast and we started fooling around and the next thing I know she’s crying and yelling her safeword and then she just left.”
“She safeworded on you?” Surprise colored Holden’s tone.
“Yeah.” And the fact that she hadn’t been tuned in enough to realize that her babygirl’s demands to ‘stop’ had been very real and not just play, ate at her. “She’s never—I’ve never given her a reason to need her safeword before.”
“Sometimes it’s not about anything you’ve done. It’s easy for a scene you’ve done before to—pardon the pun—hit wrong.”
“That’s just it. We weren’t in a scene. I was just going to eat her out. All I did was touch her.”
“So it was emotional distress versus something physical.”
“Yes. Which is worse, as far as I’m concerned. Especially because I don’t fucking know why.”
“You will.” Reaching over, Holden clapped a hand on her shoulder and squeezed. “Give her some time, let her talk things over with the girls, and she’ll come to you when she’s ready.”
“Yeah. You’re right, I know you’re right.”
“But?” Holden prompted, and she turned to glare at him.
“Don’t pull your ‘Daddy knows all’ bullshit on me, Holden Prescott. I’m not your babygirl.”
“Sorry, can’t help it. It’s my job to read people and you’re basically an open fucking book right now, Delia.”
“Fuck.” Blowing out a breath, she let her head fall back against the seat. “But this feels different. It’s not like we’ve never fought before. But today was… it wasn’t just that she safeworded, Holden. I told her to sit down so we could talk and she refused. Told me no. She never tells me no. And she walked out of the house in her pajamas.” She had to swallow hard against the ball of emotion lodged in her throat. “She left without her collar. Two years, and not once has she left our apartment without letting me put her collar on, even when it meant one or both of us would be late for work.”
