Page 41 of Players Like Us
He picked up a pen, twirled it between his fingers, tossed it back on the table. “A chance? For what? A good time? Lots of sex? I’m very good at that and I could probably… Never mind. What exactly are you looking for, Rachel?”
She bit her bottom lip, pushed out the truth that had been hiding for too long. “A chance for us. Together.” One more step forward, a half-smile. “We don’t have to pretend with each other anymore, don’t you see? We can just be who we are… That’s all I want.”
“That’s all?” Those blue eyes burned into her. “You don’t want a commitment?”
“Well… Of course I want that.” Why was he pushing her away when she’d finally admitted her true feelings? “I’m not going to be afraid of what I feel and neither should you.”
He sat back in his chair, folded his hands behind his head, as though the conversation bored him. “So we make a commitment, and then what? A ring? A wedding? A kid or two? Probably a dog because you seem like a dog person. Is that what you’re thinking?”
He might act disinterested, but the jaw twitch said otherwise. “At some point… I would hope we might head in that direction…” Yes! she wanted to shout at him. Yes, I want a life with you. And if that leads to marriage and children and a dog, or three dogs? Yes! Absolutely, yes!
“I see.” His gaze landed on the edge of the desk, homed in on a paperweight.
“I just told you what’s in my heart, and that’s all you have to say?” Pain surged through her, threatened to burst into a million pieces of misery. “Neal? Say something.”
“I’m not sure there’s anything else to say. I offered you everything and you had to think about it, so...I made the decision for you. You’re too dangerous, too mercurial, and I won’t let you destroy me. No matter how much—” he caught himself, cleared his throat and corrected “—I won’t let you destroy me.”
He really was going to just walk away. “If you can walk away that easily, then I guess I should be glad it’s happening now.” Rachel squared her shoulders, hid the emotion that wanted to scream at him for giving up. “Excuse me, but I have a meeting.” She glanced at her watch, frowned. “In fact, he’s probably waiting outside now to use this office. If you don’t mind?” She stared at him, determined not to let him see one more ounce of emotion.
“Let me guess. You’re here to meet Dominic’s partner? The one who prefers to work behind the scenes and isn’t much interested in having his face or his name plastered about the social scene.” He didn’t wait for her to comment, but continued. “You’re going to show him the rest of your portfolio and the plans for new projects, because this man has a lot of influence. You’re going to pitch your ideas and see if you can get him to buy in, because that will make you a success, right? And that’s what you really want, isn’t it? Success, so you can show your family you’re not a failure?”
She would not let him see how wrong he was, or how much his words hurt. “Yes, exactly.”
The smile that inched across the lips she’d once kissed flattened. “Well then, have a seat.”
“Excuse me?” He’d already rejected her, why would he not just leave? Why would he not… Oh no. Please no! Rachel dragged her gaze to his, spotted the glitter in those blue eyes. “You’re the partner.”
“I am.”
She tried to comprehend his words, but none of it made sense. “You watched me as I worried about meeting Dominic’s partner, living up to the expectations and hoping for a chance? And you’re him?”
“Is it that implausible?”
Rachel ignored the question as anger seeped through her. “You’re the one who acted as though you knew nothing about how to make money, except from your trust fund. You’re the one who belittled yourself. And all this time you were laughing at me? Wondering how far I’d go and how low I’d stoop for an opportunity? You played me?”
“Maybe we played each other. Players like us, right? Isn’t that what we are?”
“Go to hell.” His presence and his words snuffed the air from the room, made it difficult to breathe, difficult to think… Rachel turned and had her hand on the doorknob when his words reached her.
“What about the portfolio? Don’t you want to give me your pitch?”
She swung around, took three steps toward him, and tossed the portfolio at his chest. He caught it before it hit him. “Goodbye, Neal.” She ran from the restaurant, didn’t stop until she was three buildings away and could gulp fresh air.
Neal Alexander was a lie. Nothing had been real—especially them.
“Well, I hope you’re happy. You probably ruined the very best thing that ever happened to you and for what?” Dominic crossed his arms over his chest, stared down at Neal. “To win? Win what? Win the game and lose the girl?” He shook his head, muttered under his breath, “She loves you and you were too proud and too foolish to recognize it.”
Neal dragged a hand through his hair, poured a scotch, and tossed it back. “What do you know about relationships and women? I don’t see you with anyone for more than two weeks.”
“We’re not talking about me. We’re talking about you and Rachel and how you feel about each other. And how you royally screwed this up. So you had to hold it over her that you were the partner? You couldn’t come clean from the beginning like I wanted you to and just own up to it. Did you tell her about Claudia’s, too? That you’re the mystery guy, and that you gave Claudia money to get the place started?”
“Of course not.”
“Wow. This is one big screw-up. No wonder she bailed on you.”
Neal rubbed his temples, tried to think. Why had she looked so hurt and dejected? Why had her words sounded true? Okay, when she told him to go to hell, she definitely meant that, but the other words? The ones about misjudging him, wanting another chance...wanting a life with him? If she felt that way, it shouldn’t have taken her days to own up to it. And yet it had. “Did you spill to her that I was the partner? Is that why she came in all apologetic and practically asking for another chance?”
“What’s wrong with you? I would never do that. That was for you to own up to, not me. I’m your best friend, and sometimes I’m your conscience, but I am not going to be your mouthpiece. If you can’t figure out that she loves you, then you don’t deserve her. And while we’re at it, if you don’t want her, then just accept that she’s going to end up with someone else.”
