Page 15 of Kissing the Debutant
How about heck no?
She stared at him, taking in his shy, hopeful smile and also the nervousness in the way he twisted his hands together. What did a janitor know about dance?
Stepping back away from him, she couldn’t think. Lillian lived around kids her age at the academy, but she’d never quite figured them out. Wylder had a confidence she couldn’t understand, an “I don’t care what you think” attitude, and talked to her as if the very act wasn’t unusual.
And now Jack.
What did these kids want from her?
From early on in life, she’d learned nothing came free. Not her mother’s affections or the envy of the social circles in Lexington. There was no friendship without ulterior motives, no equal relationships.
All she could rely on was herself, the truths only she knew. Lillian was a dancer, but what if she didn’t want tobea dancer? What if she wanted to dance without the pressure, without the expectations?
And this boy wanted her to dance with him.
When her thoughts finally calmed, she narrowed her eyes in distrust. “What do you meandance with you?”
He sucked in a deep breath. “Okay, so I have this project for my videography class. We’re supposed to create a documentary about something we love. Well…” He spread his hands as if what he loved was obvious.
But Lillian wasn’t a mind reader. “I still don’t understand.”
“Dance.” One corner of his mouth ticked up. “I want to make mine about dance.”
There was something so hopeful in his eyes, so earnest, and she wasn’t quite sure what to do with it. Talking to people wasn’t exactly a talent of hers. “Uh, okay?” She could hear her mother’s chastisement for uttering monosyllabic nonsense.
“I don’t quite know what I’ll do yet or how I’ll do this, but I need a female dancer, and you’re the best I know.”
She hugged her arms across her chest. “But you don’t know me.”
“Of course I do. You’re Lillian Preston, my cousin’s star pupil.”
“I’m not her star pupil.” Lillian knew how that sounded, like she didn’t think she was good enough to be a star, but voicing her true meaning would have sounded arrogant even to her. Lillian’s mother was right. Despite being in her class, there was little Katrina could teach her. Lillian was already a better dancer, and would likely have a much more successful dancing career. She wasn’t anyone’s pupil, but she was a star.
“Sure you are.” Jack stepped toward her. “You’ve been dancing here for years now. I’ve seen you. When you’re in this studio, no one can watch anyone else.”
Lillian stared down at her feet, not quite sure how she felt about Jack watching her. She’d never been comfortable with praise because she’d grown up with her mother’s constantconstructivecriticism—as she called it. Most of the time, it just felt like plain old criticism.
But even if Jack’s story about his school project was true, and he needed her to dance with him, what made him think he could choreograph a competition level dance?
The longer she stayed silent, the more his smile fell. Not everyone was as comfortable not speaking as a girl who grew up in a quiet house without yelling or laughter or chatter over the dinner table.
“Look.” Jack rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m a little desperate here. I don’t want the video to be about me dancing, but me dancing with someone else. If you say no, I’m going to have to ask my little sister. Sure, at five years old she’ll be easy to lift, but something tells me our size differences might make things a little awkward.” A grin slid across his face.
Lillian wanted to smile like him, she wanted his endearing talk about his sister to pull her toward him and make her agree. As she studied him, she realized no matter his skill, dancing with him could actually be fun. Real, honest to goodness fun.
But dance wasn’t about having fun.
She turned away from him and started gathering her things.
“Wait, where are you going?” He jogged after her as she walked toward the door.
“Back to school.” Where else would she go?
“But you haven’t answered me.”
She stopped at the front door and stared out into the dark parking lot. “I can’t dance with you, Jack.”
“Why not?”
