Page 35 of Always a Roommate
I stared at him, letting the beam of light drift to the ground. “Who says you can’t help?”
He let out a desperate sigh. “The principal. Other teachers. I have over one hundred students to teach history to every day. That’s my job.”
“Well, maybe this isn’t about your job. Helping him could be something else.”
Shane lifted one shoulder in a shrug, and I could tell he didn’t want to talk about it anymore. He’d spoken his truth, told no lies.
This game was a real joy.
“I loved Rae,” Tanner blurted.
A startled laugh escaped my lips, and I swung the light to him. “What?”
“When we were younger. I felt completely creepy for it since you were three years younger than me, but I had the biggest crush on you.”
It took me a moment to realize Shane was also laughing.
“Bro,” he said. “That was never a secret.”
“Really?” I asked. “Everyone knew?”
Shane couldn’t keep his lips from twitching up. “The guy named his surfboard Rae when he was fifteen.”
“Yeah.” I’d known that. “Ray, as in ray of sunshine. We live in Florida.”
Tanner mumbled something I didn’t hear.
“Excuse me, boy who was in love with me?” I couldn’t help it. This was kind of good. And he’d brought it on himself. “I didn’t hear what you said.”
Tanner raised his voice. “I said, maybe I shouldn’t have told you.”
“Oh no.” I grinned. “You definitely should.”
“I’m over it, in case you were wondering.”
“Thank the sweet earth.” Really, Tanner and I were more like siblings than anything. He and Finley had always been my family.
I saw the danger in Tanner’s eyes as the light hit them. He wanted to get me back for the teasing. His lips started to form the words, and I couldn’t stop him.
“It’s not any worse than your crush on Shane.”
Silence. The only sound to reach us was the constant pounding of the rain, the crashing of thunder.
And then, I started laughing. Hard enough to shake my entire body. Hard enough to feel the wetsuit constricting my breathing. And still, I couldn’t look at Shane.
“I’m sorry.” I patted my knee, finally lifting my eyes to the man I’d crushed on since he was just a boy. “It was a kid crush. I hadn’t even remembered, and now it just seems ridiculous. We don’t even like each other.”
I caught Tanner’s grimace out of the corner of my eye and knew I’d gone a bit too far. I needed a subject change, and quick.
Luckily, it was my turn. The confession popped out like it’d been on the tip of my tongue, begging for release. “I don’t think I’m meant to fall in love.”
Tanner blew out a breath. “What could possibly make you think that?”
“Don’t get me wrong, I believe in it with everything I am. I couldn’t be a wedding planner if I didn’t. But I spend my days with people who’d do anything for each other. They’d jump in front of bullets, face family holidays, dress up in ridiculous matching Halloween costumes. I can’t imagine myself ever finding that.”
It was true. I’d dated plenty of men, but even the ones who spouted out I love yous faster than I could blink, they weren’t right. I wasn’t sure what right even felt like.
Tanner said something else, but I didn’t hear him because when I let my gaze rise, all I could see were Shane’s dark eyes locking with mine.
