Page 33 of Only ever you-Ana & Byron
He moved into halls near the Newcastle College campus, where he'd enrolled in the BSc (Hons) Applied Physical Education and Sports Coaching. It was hands-on, physical, and intense. Just how he needed it so he wouldn't have a moment to dwell.
He trained like a demon. He was always the first to arrive at practice and the last to leave. He studied hard, too. Threw himself into lectures, seminars, and exams. No alcohol, no smoking, no drugs, no girls. He owed it to Ana.
But every so often, news reached him.
From Gray.
From social media.
From mutual friends.
Ana was doing well.
She was writing for The Cherwell, Oxford's student paper. Opinion pieces, campus stories, and the occasional satirical jab at universitypolitics. Byron read every one. Twice. It was almost like he could feel her through the words on the page.
He did his best not to ask. But he always did.
Whenever Gray rang, he'd slip it in as casually as possible.
"How's Oxford?"
"You spoke to Ana?"
"She alright?"
Gray was not one to talk much. But he said enough to keep Byron breathing.
***
Once, Ana's dad visited Newcastle for a training conference. He'd dropped by to check in on Byron and brought him home-baked lasagne wrapped in foil like he was still the boy who hung around their kitchen after school, looking like he hadn’t eaten a hot meal in days.
They didn't talk much. Just sat on the bleachers while Byron tied his boots.
But before leaving, he clapped Byron's shoulder and said, "She's finding her feet. That girl's tougher than all of us put together."
Byron had nodded. Was he selfish to wish that she was as miserable as he was?
He hoarded those scraps like treasure.
Held them close like a dragon guarding gold.
It hurt, but it was all he had. He almost dialed her number a hundred times. Almost.
Sylvia was cagier now. Whenever he called, she'd tease or sigh or pretend to be distracted, but sometimes, in flashes, she'd drop things.
"Ana got featured on the student blog this week."
"I heard she dyed her hair. Her mum showed me a photo. Looks good. I'm not saying that to piss you off."
"Apparently, she's been going running with some guy from her department."
Then came the news he had been dreading after the term break.
Gray sounded distracted. Exams were kicking his arse.
"Cadi said she's seeing someone. Some bloke called Harvey. "
Byron said nothing. He just mumbled something about practice and hung up. Then he put his head between his knees and tried to breathe in and out slowly to stave off the panic attack.
