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My phone buzzes.

Dad

Need a ride yet?

Me

Yeah. I’m ready.

As I walk back to the boardwalk to wait for Dad, placing my feet right next to Jameson’s larger footprints, I replay our lunch. The way Jameson paid, the hand touching, the personal stories, the almost-confession. It all points to something more than friendship, but without hearing what he was about to say, I’m still stuck in this limbo of not knowing.

My phone buzzes again.

Jameson

I’m sorry about that. Tyler has the worst timing in the history of the world.

Me

It’s okay. Team comes first.

Three dots appear and disappear several times. And then…

Jameson

Today was really nice, Kevin. The best afternoon I’ve had in a long time.

Me

Same.

I add a smiley face emoji, then delete it. Add it again. Delete it. Finally, I hit send without it because I’m overthinking.

Dad pulls up a few minutes later. I climb in, no doubt looking worse for wear.

“How’d it go?” Dad asks, pulling back into traffic.

“It went well.”

“That’s my boy.” He reaches over to ruffle my hair.

As we drive home, I hold onto the idea that being Jameson Hart’s boyfriend could be more than wishful thinking. That someone as innocuous as I could be the apple of someone’s eye. That one day soon, I could be loved and appreciated, flaws and all.

CHAPTER 17

confident

“God! It’s like an interrupted orgasm!”

“Rita!” My eyes bulge out of my head at my best friend’s inappropriate way of describing Jameson’s almost-maybe-confession.

Our favorite workout ritual is in full effect. The two of us are in my basement, facing the TV, and making our way through a session ofJust Dance. The room is a mess of scattered popcorn, half-drank cans of soda, and the fancy LED party lights I insisted on for “ambience,” which really means “overkill.” We’re both in shorts and T-shirts, and even though the hour is barely eight at night, we’re ready to go all night.

“What else would you call it?” She spins around, her wild red hair whipping as she nails the moves to “Toxic” by Britney Spears. “You’re sitting there, the moment is building, he’s about to say something life-changing, and then—BAM! Tyler shows up and ruins everything.”

I stumble, completely off-beat. The screen flashes “MISS” repeatedly, but I’m too distracted to care. “It wasn’t life-changing. He was probably going to say he had fun, which is what he ended up saying in a text message.”

“Kevin Pryor, you are the worst liar in the history of liars.” Rita doesn’t break her rhythm as she calls me out. “The boy held your hand. Multiple times. He bought you lunch. He took you for a romantic beach walk.”