Page 58 of The Lord who Seduced Me
She had never felt Cabe this panicked before and his kiss proved it. His body was stiff, and she ran her hands up and down his back, trying to soothe him.
Trying to not get lost in his kiss. But letting him take what he needed from her.
He finally pulled away from her mouth and put his forehead to hers. She looked up into his face and her eyebrows drew down in concern.
“Cabe,” she put one hand to his face. His eyes shut tight, panic and strain on every line of his face. “What is wrong?”
He shuddered in her arms, and his eyes opened. Looking down at her, he searched her gaze and his body gradually softened in her embrace. “I had to see you. I had to make certain you were safe.”
“Make certain I was safe? Cabe? What does that mean?” She did not like the sound of his voice or his reason why he was here.
He closed his eyes again and pulled his forehead from hers. He stayed in her arms, and his wound tighter around her, pulling her into his chest. He did not answer her, and Rose’s trepidation grew.
“Cabe, what is wrong?”
Cabe sighed, “I don’t want you to worry, and I don’t know if I should tell you everything, because it would do nothing but worry you, but I have to go away for a while. But I had to see you. Kiss you, feel you. Convince myself you are real, and not something from my imagination or something from a dream.”
“You are leaving me? But you claimed me, then promised me you were done pushing me away. Cabe, I do not like this. Tell me what is wrong. This instant!”
She pulled herself out of his arms, and stepped away from him, out of his reach and put her hands on her hips.
Her eyes were beginning to feel hot and she was starting to breathe hard, fighting not to cry. Cabe shook his head and stepped toward her, and she backed out of reach again.
“Tell me, please. I need to know.” She whispered; her voice gone. She was afraid to hear what he had to say, and her fight was quickly leaving her.
Cabe sighed, “I knew I shouldn’t have come here. But I couldn’t stay away. I just had to see you. Had to kiss you. Hold you.”
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, needing to get herself under control. When she opened them, Cabe ran a hand over his face, “I am scared Rose. No, I am terrified. I don’t want you to know about my demons.”
Rose dropped her hands from her hips when she heard the defeat in his voice. Stepping back toward him, she pulled him into a hug.
“You may not want to tell me of your demons, but I need to know about them. Especially if you say that you are leaving me because of them.”
Cabe put his hands to her hips. He kissed her softly and pulled her to the far side of her bedchamber, away from her bed.
Sitting her on the settee in front of her fireplace. He sat next to her and held her hands in his.
But he did not look at her, just kept his head down as he spoke. “I know you know extraordinarily little of my life and what happened to my leg, and I haven’t told everyone the entire story. Very few know, aside from my crew. It’s difficult to speak of, to re-live.”
He swallowed hard, “My ship was captured when I was running a shipment for the Navy to the Caribbean. We were in the middle of a massive storm, just trying to stay afloat and not lose anyone in the process. Believe me, it is quite easy to lose a man when the waves crash on the deck and take men with them in the blink of an eye.”
He squeezed her hand and continued, “When a ship, -a monster ship- that was all black and quiet as a passing cloud came out of nowhere. It started attacking us and crippling my already struggling ship in the process.”
He squeezed his eyes shut and held her hands tighter in his, “The rest of the crew was taken. The ones who had survived the original attack that is. A lot of good men were killed in the attack. We were put into the brig of my own ship, still not believing that we had been attacked by the ship that was thought to be a myth.”
He gave a sardonic laugh and shook his head. “It turns out that not all myths are fake. The ship was called The Destruction of the Sea. It was very much real. And we were now captives of it is very lethal and evil captain. A man feared across the oceans of the world. A man who earned the title as the most feared pirate to sail the ocean. The Renegade.”
Cabe shuddered, and when he opened his eyes, they had a faraway look, and Rose hated hearing the defeat in every syllable he spoke. “He was notorious for taking ships like mine, for kidnapping the crew, and torturing all of them until only one man lived. He would take the survivor and drop him off at a port somewhere. The survivors told such horrifying stories of the torture they went through and witnessed that were so evil, they were almost unbelievable. And it was not something any sailor wanted to go through. They were all terrified of being captured by that horrible ship. With good reason. Most men had never seen The Renegade’s ship, and most never would. He sailed the seas mainly at night, hiding during the day in places only his crew knew about and went unseen wherever he sailed. So, when he took my ship, we were completely unaware he was there. Even my best crew members in the ship's roost never saw them coming. Not with the storm and with all of us just trying to stay alive through it.”
He hung his head, and Rose had to bite her lip to keep the sob trapped inside. She hated his pain. Hated that he had gone through what he had. That the men of his crew had been hurt and had dealt with that trauma.
“Every day I had to hear my men as they were tortured. Had to listen to their screams, their cries for mercy, for their mother’s, for God. What was the hardest was that they made certain to save Nathaniel and I for the very last each day. And then when I was dragged back to my cell, I would have to hear when each man took their last breath. The ones who were not able to withstand the torture their bodies had gone through. I can still hear their screams at night. Reliving each sound as they were put through what no human being should. The Renegade lived for men’s screams. But I never gave him the satisfaction of hearing me scream.”
His face turned up, and Rose saw the pride there, it flashed across his face fast, and then was gone in the space of a breath.
“We were held for who knows how long. Time ceased to exist to us. We were living minute by minute. Just hoping to exist the next day. Or wishing for death to take us. Until one day a Navy ship happened upon us by accident. My ship was dead in the water, and The Renegade’s ship stuck out like a sore thumb. The Navy ship knew they had stumbled upon something that they never thought was possible. The man that was wanted around the world was within their grasp. They took the opportunity to fire on The Renegade’s ship and because of that, the rest of my crew that still lived, Nathaniel and I were rescued.”
He took a deep breath, “The Renegade and his crew were able to escape after the war they waged with the Navy ship and mine. But he did not like that we had seen his face, that we survived, when he doesn’t let anyone aside from his chosen person survive. And because of our liberation, because he did not get to finish what he started, The Renegade has decided to come for me. To get his revenge against me, Nathaniel and my crew. He has a man following me and knows everything there is to know about me. Including knowing about you. He threatened you Rose. Your life. The lives of your family. And I will not let anything, or anyone touch you. Harm you. I will not let the Renegade get anywhere near you. I refuse to let that happen.”
