Page 21 of When the Last One Falls
Iwas staring at the dark amber liquid in my glass, and I was no closer to feeling better about Friday night than I had when I’d stormed out of Keris’ bedroom.
While I could admit to being a despicable bastard when I came to many of my business deals, I hadn’t really considered myself one when it had come to the fairer sex. I’d always been honest about my intentions, and I’d never had to consider a woman’s feelings because she hadn’t ever needed to consider mine. It’d all been simple and straightforward.
All that changed Friday night.
In all my life, I’d never forced myself on an unwilling female, and any woman that I had ‘forced’ myself on, she’d been begging for it, roleplaying being something that I wasn’t afraid to do. Every woman in my bed had always been sober, willing, and ready. Yeah, most of them had been paid for, but even better. There’d been no confusion about expectations or personal intentions afterwards.
What I’d done to Keris had bordered on rape, and hell…maybe it had been. While she hadn’t said no, she sure as fuck hadn’t said yes. In fact, if anyone wanted to analyze it enough, her calling me a bastard could have been her telling me no.
Also, that wasn’t the worst of it, even though it should be. The worst of it was how my dick got hard whenever I thought about how wet and tight Keris had felt wrapped around me. Her screaming had hit my ears like heroin to an addict’s bloodstream, and I’d never had better pussy. Pinning her down by her neck, forcing her to submit, making her accept her place, slamming my dick balls-deep into her tight cunt…all of it’d had me feeling high and out of control. I wanted to fuck her again, only this time, I wanted to watch those tears of rage coursing down her face, and that was the only reason that I’d left and had spent the night at my condo. It was the same reason that I hadn’t gone back to the house last night.
I wasn’t a fucking rapist.
“Look, man…I mean…she could have said no, right?” Onyx posed, trying to make me feel better about what I’d done.
When I’d woken up this morning, still feeling like shit for taking something that Keris hadn’t given me permission to take, I’d known almost immediately that I needed to get my shit together before showing up at work tomorrow. I felt like I was on edge, and I was liable to take it out on someone in the most vicious way tomorrow if anyone crossed me.
I shot Onyx a look. “It doesn’t matter if a woman says no or not. A lot of women submit out of fear, Onyx,” I told him. “If a woman isn’t spreading her legs for you because shewantsto, it doesn’t matter if she says no or not.”
“I don’t know, Brant,” Magnus said carefully. “She didn’t look fearful when I walked up on you guys on the sidewalk. In fact, the red handprint on the side of your face would suggest that Keris Bishop is most definitely not scared of you.”
“Kingston,” I said testily. “Her fucking name is Keris Kingston.”
Magnus threw his hands up, trying to ward off my irritation. “Dude, you don’t have to remind me of that,” he chuckled.
I stretched my neck, cracking the tension that was threatening to make me snap. We were sitting in my office, and we were all drinking in the middle of the day because I couldn’t get my shit together. The only thing that had me even acting like a responsible human being was that Keris hadn’t moved out of the house yet. Like a certified psychopath, I’d been monitoring the security cameras and making my household staff report back to me like little spies.
“Okay, I get the moral dilemma, but if she really believed that you raped her, or whatever, then she would have called the police by now, right?” Onyx said, trying again. “Especially, with that damn video circulating everywhere. If she wanted to accuse you of being violent, then that video would back her up.”
Saturday morning had been filled with notifications of mine and Ares’ fight at the Harrington Hall. The damn thing had gone viral, making the news. Ares and I were actually fucking trending for something other than business reasons, and if that wasn’t fucking stupid, then I didn’t know what was. No matter that I’d been the one to start it, two grown men fighting was not anything to be proud of. Wonderfully, the video was also very high quality, so anyone watching it could easily see me losing my shit as I defended my wife like an insecure asshole. Luckily, it also had Ares making sure that no one misunderstood the situation, so Keris’ reputation was still intact.
It also hadn’t helped my mood when my father had called me, demanding an explanation. After telling that sonofabitch off, I had ignored his calls for the rest of the day, and I was still ignoring his calls.
“Even if she doesn’t call the cops, I can’t imagine that she appreciated our first time together being like that,” I drawled out. “It wasn’t exactly romantic.” Normally, I didn’t kiss and tell, but I had no idea what to do next.
“So, what is it?” Magnus asked. “I thought it was an arranged marriage that was going to be lived out like roommates with faithful benefits; her doing her thing, and you doing yours.”
“That’d been the plan until she stared up at me with tearful violence in her eyes right after slapping the shit out of me,” I admitted. “Whatever fucking spell she weaved around me, it fucking worked.”
“So, you’re a masochist?” Onyx asked, grinning like an asshole.
I flipped him off before saying, “I don’t know what it is about her, but I’m royally fucked if I can’t figure it out.”
“It’s that hate-sex that’s got you all twisted up,” Magnus said. “That shit’s addicting.”
“I felt addicted to her before we fucked, Magnus,” I reminded him. “This has nothing to do with hate-sex.”
“Why is that?” Onyx asked, and we both turned to look his way. “Why is violent sex always the best?” He shook his head. “Even though it rarely happens these days, that’s the only type of sex I ever have with Jewel. We’ll be in a heated argument, then the next thing that I know, we’re clawing at each other like animals, and it always leaves one of us a bloody fucking mess.”
“It’s either fuck them or kill them,” Magnus answered simply.
I glanced over at my friend. “Because walking away isn’t an option?”
He smirked as he looked back at me. “You tell me,” he said. “I’m not the one that pinned my wife to the bed Friday night and had my way with her without her permission.”
“Ouch,” Onyx muttered, though the fucker was grinning.
“And that’s why you two fuckers are here,” I reminded him. “I want to do it again, and if that’s not fucked-up, then I don’t know what is.”
