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Gabriel sighed. “I really want to see something else for a change.”
Bruce lifted an eyebrow and gave Gabriel a hard look. “Give it a day or two, but remember, I expect you to treat Cia with the same care and devotion as you would your ten-year-old daughter.”
“Of course.” Gabriel nodded and took my hand. “The day after tomorrow then?”
I nodded. Even though a change of scenery was tempting, I actually didn’t mind waiting a few days. I was physically drained from not getting much sleep last night and overwhelmed from the drama with Gabriel and the therapy session. There were about a million thoughts in my mind, and one of them was Gabriel’s raw reminder from last night that he wasn’t my boyfriend and I had no right to be jealous. Yet I was.
I was annoyed and on edge. Angry at Gabriel for making me confused. Angry at Bruce for making me think of my mom and even consider seeing her again.
When we got outside Gabriel grabbed my hand but I pulled it away. “I’m ten, you don’t need to hold my hand,” I said.
“But I like to hold your hand,” he protested and tried to grab it again.
“Maybe later – right now I’m going to get out of this awful pink dress and take a nap, and later I’m going to paint. Why don’t you go for that long hike you’ve been talking about?” I suggested, praying he would take the hint and give me space to breathe and get my head straight.
His face fell. “But I wanted us to do that hike together.”
“Yeah, well, I’m a preteen now, I need some alone time.”
“Okay, if you insist,” he said and went to pack his backpack to bring with him.
I watched him gear up while I stepped out of the puffy dress and got under the blanket on our bed.
“Are you sure you don’t want to come?” he asked a last time. “I’ll tell you some really gory stories from the war on the way, if you come.”
I gave him a tired smile. “Tell me later, okay?”
“Can a dad still hug and kiss his ten year-old?” he asked.
“I don’t know.”
He leaned forward and kissed the top of my hair. “Well, I’m doing it. Sweet dreams, darling, I’ll see you in a few hours.”
When he left, the room felt empty without him. Just like it had when I woke up from my nightmare last night.
I’m not stupid, I knew it was problematic that I had become addicted to his company; I suppressed the part of me that wanted to call him back and ask him to curl up with me and be my pillow of safety while I slept.
In a week I would be back on my own. Hell, after the trial I might even go to jail for a year. I needed to get a grip on myself, before I turned into a pathetic girl depending on a man to save me.
?∞?
Two days later we finally went on a drive to do a bit of shopping. Gabriel wanted to take me to Olympia, which would offer the biggest selection of shops, but being so close to the ocean I begged him to take me there instead. Seattle has a lot of water, but it’s all lakes and Puget Sound, meaning that whenever you’re by the water, there’s a view with mountains in the background. I wanted to stand on a beach and see nothing but water, just like in the movies. No mountains in the distance, just blue ocean as far as my eyes could see.
We ended up in a place called Ocean Shores, which turned out to be a nice vacation spot.
Luckily, my clothes had been upgraded to something less girly, now that I had finally reached the age of twelve years old. I was wearing a simple denim skirt and a marine blue t-shirt with a cat wearing large purple glasses. Obviously not something I would have ever worn if I had a choice, but then again, I only wore black in the real world.
We had promised Bruce to stay in character and maybe for that reason, Gabriel asked me a lot of questions about my art project, which was almost finished and offered a safe topic.
It was the middle of May and one of those unusual warm days with almost eighty degrees, so the minute we arrived at Ocean Shores, Gabriel wanted an ice cream.
“What do you want, sweetie?” he asked and I looked around to see if anyone had heard him. It’s one thing to be called Sweetie, Sugar, and Candy back in the camp, but here, where strangers didn’t know that it was a role-play, I suddenly felt shy about it.
“You know people are going to assume that we’re a couple if you keep saying things like that,” I muttered low.
“I don’t care what strangers think,” he said and took my hand. “Come on, let me get my girl an ice cream.”
I chose a big vanilla soft ice, and we walked down to the beach and found a bench to sit and enjoy the view.
