Page 158 of Yellow
It was impossible not to laugh. Mostly because he stuck out his tongue in concentration and swayed his hips from side to side in a clumsy way that made the girlish-looking hula hoop spin around him in a bumpy way like a bike with a flat tire.
“That’s a serious exercise regimen you have going on,” Christian called out over the loud laughing.
“Oh, it’s not a regular hula hoop, my friend,” Darren said with a tone of self-importance. “It’s a fitness hula hoop with weights in it. I just paid extra to get the pretty version with the glitter.”
“Oh, totally worth the money. The glitter makes all the difference,” Christian commented.
“I bet you couldn’t do it,” Darren told Christian. “I just make it look easy because I’m so talented.”
“How hard can it be?” Christian bantered back.
“Here, let me see you give it a try.” Darren handed the hula hoop to Christian and stepped back.
Christian took up the challenge, and people eagerly called out instructions.
“Bend your knees.”
“Push it with your hips.”
“It has to be higher up.”
Despite Christian’s stubbornly sticking with it until the ring had dropped fifteen times and he was cursing under his breath, he never succeeded.
“I want to try,” Violet said and suddenly everyone was having a go at the hula hoop. Of course Faith, being a dancer and cheerleader, mastered the thing like a pro and could make it go higher and lower as she pleased, while I was happy to even be able to spin it on my first try, after Darren had rudely told Adam and me that we should wash our hands before touching it.
“Sorry, but who knows how sticky your fingers are after your little dalliance in the car?”
Leave it to Darren to make a grown man and woman blush, but he did have a point, so we obliged.
“I haven’t used one since I was a kid,” I said and handed it to Adam. “Why don’t you try?”
“Nah, I don’t play with girls’ toys.”
“You’re just afraid you’re going to look as stupid as the rest of us,” Christian goaded him.
“Of course not. Why would a grown man swinging a hula hoop look stupid?” Adam asked sarcastically.
I crossed my arms and tilted my head. “Come on, medicine man, less talk and more hip-swinging.”
“Fine.” Adam stepped inside the plastic ring, and spread his legs to get into position. He managed two rounds before it fell down.
“See…” Darren raised his glass of red wine. “Not one of the fellas can do what I do. That’s because I’m so damn fit and sporty. Case closed.”
Adam tried again and like the others before him, his movements were much too frantic, bouncing his hips back and forth.
“Oh, for God’s sake, Adam, you’re not supposed to fuck the ring, just swing it around gracefully,” Darren exclaimed.
Adam flipped his finger at Darren and dropped the hula hoop. Darren in return blew Adam a sweet kiss.
“I still don’t think you can outrun me,” Melody said loudly.
“Oh, honey, I don’t have to. I just out-hooped you.” Darren called back to her. “Besides, I only run with people who fill their water bottles with alcohol or wine, and you would probably try to poison me with some questionable kale juice or something.”
“You don’t really put alcohol in your water bottle, do you?” Faith asked.
Darren sighed heavily. “My beautiful girl, it’s the only way, because running with wineglasses can make some terrible stains on your clothes, and you should always look your best, right?”
“It’s just Darren’s twisted humor,” Melody pointed out to us. “You’ll soon learn that you can’t take anything he saysseriously. Just reverse it and you have the truth.”
