Page 57 of The Pacifist
The door closed and after going over safety details and confirming my desired destination, the drone slowly rose from the ground.
I looked out the window, seeing Jonah wave at me and mouthing the words “I love you.”
My stomach cramped in pain and my heart wanted to stop the drone and beg him to be everything I’d dreamed he would be. Placing my hand on the window, I mouthed the words back, hoping he wouldn’t see my tears falling.
Jonah kept waving at me as I leaned my forehead on the glass watching him turn into a small dot as the drone took me back north.
For hours I sat in deep thought until it dawned on me that I’d need a ride from the border. Not wanting to disturb my parents, I called my soul sister Raven instead.
Raven and I had been friends since I was ten years old, and after one glance at me, her happy smile faltered and she exclaimed, “What happened to you?”
Bursting with emotions, I told her everything.
“You made out with Jonah?” Her confusion would have been funny except that with the pain I was in, nothing was funny. “But he’s a Motlander man. I didn’t think they were interested in that sort of thing.”
I rolled my eyes. “Raven, everyone is different.”
“I know, but Jonah…” She gave a small whistle. “Damn, who would have known?”
Ignoring her comment, I changed the subject. “How have you been?”
“Good. I’m working hard and I just nailed one of my tests at the academy.”
“And how are you and Leo?”
Raven swung her hair over her shoulder and frowned. “I’m not going to be your obnoxious friend who raves about my relationship while you’re grieving.”
“But you’re fine?”
“Yes.” The corners of her eyes crinkled as her face softened. “Leo is just…”
Her wistful smile made me chuckle and take a guess: “Amazing?”
“Yes. Amazing.”
“I’m so happy for you, Raven.” Giving her hand a last squeeze, I let go and sat back in my seat taking in the view. “I love the lushness of the Northlands. It’s so pretty here.”
“Everything will be prettier in the spring.”
“Yes.” I tensed up just thinking about what else spring would bring.
Raven was perceptive and leaned closer. “Are you still going to have the tournament?”
I looked away. “Why not? I wouldn’t be the first bride to be in love with someone else, and I’m not going to settle for a hidden relationship with a man who doesn’t want people to know that we’re together.”
“Jonah said that?”
“Raven, people like us are seen as romantics and it’s not a compliment. They think of us as naïve and insecure fools who believe in fairytales and need someone to make us happy.”
“I never saw myself as a romantic.”
“That doesn’t matter. Others will see you that way because you’re married.”
She wrinkled her nose up. “Why should I care what others think?”
“You shouldn’t, but Jonah was chosen by the people and their opinion of him matters. Especially now that his family is under scrutiny.”
Raven leaned back again. “I still can’t believe his sister said those things. We saw some of it at the academy.”
