Page 85 of Charlie
River and I stayed with Nathan and when he ran out of tears, we gave him tissues to blow his nose and dry his eyes.
“Ciara made you some toast. Do you want to eat it?” I reached for the plate to offer him the food.
Nathan shook his head. “No. I’m not hungry.”
“How do you feel?”
“I’m still cold but it’s better now.”
“It’s because of River’s foot rubs, isn’t it?”
My heart leaped when Nathan’s lips lifted in a tiny smile and he looked to the blond girl. “Yes, I think it is.”
It only made River massage his feet with more gusto.
I hadn’t planned on bringing it up again, but then Nathan turned his head and asked me, “Why does Conor lie so much?”
Telling them the truth was a big risk. I couldn’t take the chance that words like psychopath or narcissist might find their way back to Conor. Not until we had enough evidence to arrest him.
“Conor lies because he’s a proud man who doesn’t want to admit he was wrong.” It was the most diplomatic answer I could give them.
“I hate when he does it,” Nathan mumbled low.
“Adults shouldn’t be allowed to lie,” River chimed in.
“No, they shouldn’t.” I was thoughtful for a moment before I asked. “Did you ever hear the story of the two brothers?”
“What brothers?” Nathan was still leaning against me.
“There once were two brothers. One had become a drunk and a criminal who ended up in prison. When he was asked what the reason for his failure was, he answered, ‘My father.’ Now, the other brother was extremely successful in life with a beautiful family and a great job. When he was asked what caused his success, he answered, ‘My father.’”
Both children looked at me and then each other.
“I don’t get it.” River played with her hair. “Is it because the father was only nice to one of them?”
Shaking my head, I stroked Nathan’s hair. “No, the point is that one brother let his father’s behavior break him, while the other grew up with a clear image of what he didn’t want to become himself. The story is to remind you that you two get to decide what kind of adults you want to be. You’re smart enough to see that not all adults behave in the best manner. But here’s the good news; you get to observe and think to yourself.,I’m never going to do that when I grow up, or if you see something you like, you can put that on the list of things to strive for.”
“I’m never going to lie!” Nathan declared with a solemn expression on his face.
I squeezed him a little harder. “If you grow up to be one of the few adults who can live up to that promise, then being cold in a pond for a few hours will be worth it. Maybe the universe put you through this pain so that you could become a better adult than the rest of us.”
“You think?”
I placed my chin on top of his hair, still with my arms wrapped around him from behind. “No matter how old you get, I think you’ll always remember the trauma of what happened today. Ten or twenty years from now you can look back and be filled with rage that Conor’s pride cost you so much pain and suffering. Or you can look back and think of this day as a defining moment in your life that made you a better person.”
“I guess.” He turned his head to look at me. “But why does he hate me so much?”
The pain in his beautiful brown eyes made my throat swell up with emotion. I wanted to tell him that he didn’t want the love of the man who killed his mother anyway, and that he was way too good for Conor, but I had to be careful with my words. “We’re all flawed people, Nathan. Not everyone has the capacity to love unconditionally. Conor’s pride makes him say and do things he shouldn’t, but his shortcomings have nothing to do with you.” I stroked his hair again. “You’re a precious and beautiful young man. I’ve only known you for a few weeks and I already love you. That’s how easy you are to love.”
Nathan lifted his hand to hold my wrist and then he squeezed a little. “Thank you, Liv.”
“What about me? Do you love me too?” River’s eyebrows were knitted closely together.
“You know I do!”
The worried expression on her face lifted as she lit up in a smile. “I love you too, Liv. I wish you were my mother.”
“Aww, that’s so sweet. I can be a fun aunt if you want.”
