Page 60 of Lumi
“Lumi, ye knew the sex didn’t come with a relationship. I asked ye before I came over if ye understood. Ye said yes.”
I tried pushing past him. Damian was right; he had warned me, but it didn’t change the pain of rejection eating at my heart.
“Lumi.” Damian blocked me again and touched my upper arms. “It’s not just Siobhan. I’m going to be a father. I have to do the right thing. Wouldn’t ye have wanted yer father to choose yer mother and you?”
I couldn’t speak or put into words how conflicted I was. On the one hand, I felt used and hated Damian for rejecting me. But on the other hand, I loved him for being responsible and showing this level of love toward his unborn child.
“I’m sorry, lass. I know ye think ten years isn’t that big of an age difference between us but we’re in different stages of our lives.”
Unable to meet his eyes, I fixated on his shiny black shoes.
“Can’t we be friends? I’ve tried calling ye. I miss ye.”
I held my purse in front of me as a shield. “No.” It was the only word I managed to push through my swollen throat.
“No? But we’ve been friends since…”
Guilt rushed over me. Damian had saved my life, and now I couldn’t be his friend anymore.
Blinded by tears, I stepped back. “It’s like you said. It was your job. You would have done it for anyone. I’m nothing special to you.”
“Lumi, that’s not true.” Damian reached out for me again like he couldn’t stand not touching me, but I moved further back.
“Lumi. I love ye.”
I shook my head vehemently. “No, you don’t. You pity me, but that’s not love. It was never love. I see that now.”
I turned to leave, but Damian wouldn’t let me, his tone turned pleading with a frantic edge to it. “That’s not true, and I’m not lettin’ ye go. Come back inside, and we’ll figure somethin’ out.”
The thought of seeing Siobhan dance with Damian and kiss him made me aggressive, so I pushed him back and smacked his hand away once more. “You’ve made your choice. You have a family now. I’ve lost so many and I’ll survive without you too.”
Damian’s face got red with frustration. “See, this is what I mean with ye being too young. Ye are pushin’ and hittin’ me and being emotional instead of talkin’ about it like rational people.”
His accusation knocked the breath out of me, and I hissed back, “Then go back to your mature wife and make some more babies. I’m sure Logan won’t mind my youthful energy, and I’ll bet that I’ll have wilder sex on your wedding night than you will.”
“Lumi, for fock sake, this is ridiculous,” Damian sputtered behind me, but I was already walking away.
“Lumi, get back here! We’re not done!”
I kept walking with my fist over my shoulder and the middle finger pointing in the air.
