Page 46 of Whispers at Seaside
She was as turned on by his badboy manliness as she was concerned. He could have been hurt. And then her mommy brain kicked in again. “I’m serious, Matt.”
“So am I,” he said casually.
“What if Hagen had been there?”
“I would have had you take him into the restroom with you.”
“That’s it? You would have still put yourself in danger? I’ve heard the rumors about you saving people like some kind of superhero, which is totally hot. And Parker told me that you looked like you’d been in a fight when she met you. Stepping into that situation on the boat was really dangerous.”
They stopped beside his car, and he took both of her hands in his. His chin fell to his chest, and he closed his eyes for a second.
MATT’S FIRST INSTINCT was to brush off Mira’s comments. He’d been getting away with brushing people off since college. Why should now be any different? He drew in a deep breath and opened his eyes. One look at the worry in Mira’s eyes and his heart took a nosedive. She didn’t deserve to be brushed off.Everythingwas different where she was concerned. He’d asked for her trust, and she had the right to expect the same in return.
“I promised I would never lie to you,” he said, “and I won’t. But I’m not sure what you want to hear.” He released her hands and paced. “That guy grabbed her so hard she screamed. Would you rather I pretended like it wasn’t happening?”
“No, but…” She crossed her arms, a bevy of emotions passing over her face.
“But what? Do you want me to say that if Hagen were there I would have walked away? Because it would be a lie. I would make sure he was safe, just like I did with you. But I saw the telltale signs in that guy’s posture, the danger lurking in his eyes. That woman was backing up before he even touched her. Clearly she was scared.”
“I know, but—”
“But it’s not our problem?”
“No. That’s not what I meant.”
Misdirected anger coiled deep in his gut, anger over not being there all those years ago to help his friend. He raked his hands through his hair, struggling to suppress the ugly emotions coursing through him. He took a few deep breaths and forced a calmer tone.
“Mira, I’m not a guy who can say ‘It’s not my problem’ and walk away, and I know you wouldn’t want me to. I’m sure it was scary for you to see that, and I’m sorry, but I can’t lie to you and pretend I wouldn’t do it again. But that doesn’t mean I’d put you or Hagen in danger. If I didn’t think I could handle a situation I’d back off.”
“Would you?” Her tone was so serious he stopped to think before answering.
“Maybe not,” he said honestly.
She rolled her eyes, and he stepped closer, his love for her pushing the anger out of the way.
“It’s just not that simple. There’shistorythere.”And it’s held securely in place with enough guilt to keep me going forever.
Her gaze softened and she touched the center of his chest. She smiled so sweetly it felt like an embrace.
“I shared my history with you,” she said. “Will you share yours with me?”
Chapter Eighteen
MATT MULLED OVER where to begin as he and Mira drove back to her house so they’d be there when Hagen arrived. It was one thing to admit what he’d done to Pete, who had his back no matter what. He knew that admitting the truth to Mira wouldn’t be nearly as hard as seeing the look in Mira’s eyes when it finally sank in. When she realized what his selfish drive to succeed in school had cost another woman.
“Do you mind if we sit out back?” he asked as he carried her bags to her bedroom.
“No, that’s fine.”
They sat on the steps to the deck with their feet in the sand, and she looked at him with a mix of awe and concern.
“What you did took courage, and now that we’re not right in the thick of it, I’m crushing on you even harder. Let’s face it. Who wouldn’t want a boyfriend who wasn’t afraid of, well, anything? But I have to think about Hagen and the examples we set for him. I don’t want him thinking he should step into situations he can’t handle. Plus, I worry about you.”
She pressed her hands to his cheeks and kissed him. “I just found you. I don’t want to lose you because some jerk pulls a knife or something. I need to understand this.”
Matt stole another kiss before trying to explain. “First of all, nothing’s going to happen to me. Second of all, don’t you think if Hagen ever witnessed something like that, I’d immediately explain to him why I did it and define boundaries so he didn’t think it was okay to step into something he couldn’t handle?”
She wrinkled her nose and smiled again. “I know you would.”
