Page 37 of Shimmering Emeralds
I sat down right beside him and was surprised when he didn’t immediately move away. He was completely lifeless as he gazed out at the water.
Deciding to jump straight into the deep end, I said, “I’m sorry. I should have told you.”
He sat still and silent for so long, I became convinced that he wasn’t going to acknowledge me or my apology at all. When he finally turned to look at me, his desolate eyes bored into me.
“Why didn’t you? How could you keep her from me?” His voice was barely above a whisper, but I heard every word before they were carried out to the water by the sea breeze.
“I… I don’t know. I was scared, I guess. We were so young, and you wanted to be a big star, and I didn’t want to steal that dream away from you. I was afraid that you would grow to resent me––and eventually Harper––for holding you back.”
He blinked several times as he absorbed my frantic flurry of words. His jaw moved as his teeth clenched together. When he finally spoke, his mouth barely moved. “You had no right to keep her from me.”
I nodded. “I know, and I wish I could go back and do it all again. But at the time, I thought I was doing what was best for all of us.”
“How could you think that me not even knowing I had a daughter could be what was right for anyone? Does Harper know about me?”
“No. The only person who knew was Dani.” Feeling the need to give him an out if he wanted it, I added, “And she won’t tell anyone else if you don’t want anyone to know.”
He looked at me like I had grown a second head before he stood and ran his hands through his hair. After pacing out toward the edge of the cliff that dropped down to the water, he whirled back around to look at me. “If I don’t want anyone to know?? Dammit, Meg, I want the whole damn world to know! I want to shout it from the rooftops. I want to go back in time and get back the precious years I missed with my daughter.”
Some part of me had known Levi would proudly claim his daughter, but the shadow of doubt had always managed to creep in and convince me that he might prefer not to have us weighing him down. I nodded as tears bridged my lower lids at the relief of knowing Harper’s father wanted to be a part of her life.
“You shouldn’t have kept her a secret from me.” He sneered in my direction. I’d never seen Levi so angry, and I had no valid defense. He was right.
“I know that now,” I said before trying to explain my decision. “But you had big dreams, and I couldn’t steal those away from you. You never would have forgiven me for it.”
“That wasn’t your decision to make,” he growled.
I barely noticed the light rain that started misting down on us as the frustrations of the past several years bubbled up and boiled over in my chest. “I did what I thought was best at the time. You’re a good man, Levi. You always have been. And you would have done what you thought was right. You would have stood by my side––whether you wanted to or not. I couldn’t let you do that. I loved you too much to hold you back.”
Levi shook his head and looked up at the gray sky as rain fell directly into his face. “Oh, you went by the old adage, ‘If you love something, set it free.’ Is that it?”
“Yes, but you didn’t come back to me, so I guess it wasn’t meant to be.”
“Well, I’m back now, and I’ll never forgive you for the years I missed with my daughter.”
His harsh words were like a punch to my gut. I knew he had every right to be bitter and angry with me, but I couldn’t think of a way to make it right.
“Levi, please.” I murmured, but I didn’t know what to ask of him.
We stared at each other for a long time as the rain morphed into heavier drops and soaked us both. Shaking his head as if he had nothing further to say to me, Levi whirled around and stalked off.
My phone chimed in my pocket with an incoming text. Normally, I wouldn’t bother to check it at such a crucial moment, but considering Harper’s condition, I needed to make sure nothing was amiss.
After a quick glance at the screen, I shouted at Levi to stop. When he reluctantly turned back to look at me, I revealed, “Harper’s awake!”
34
Levi
Ihated motorcycles on a good day. Riding ‘bitch’ on one in the pouring rain certainly wasn’t my idea of a great time. Since I had jogged to my bench by the sea, riding behind Meg on this death-mobile was the fastest way to get to my little girl. I just hoped Meg didn’t manage to kill us both on the way there.
Even though I didn’t want to admit it, Meg did a great job handling the huge bike, even though the wet roads made for less-than-stellar conditions. She hurried, but kept us safe as we made our way to the hospital to see Harper.
She made her own parking spot in the hospital’s lot and we both jogged inside like we owned the place. We had to look like drowned rats, but nobody stopped us as we made our way to Harper’s room.
We barged into the room, and I was surprised to find that it was bustling with activity––in stark contrast to the low-key quiet that we were used to in it. Dani was right beside Harper’s bed, holding the little girl’s hand. Several nurses and doctors were making notes in charts and adjusting equipment as if they all needed to come see for themselves that the little girl was truly awake.
Harper looked groggy, but those vivid blue eyes were the prettiest things I’ve ever seen as our daughter blinked at her mother and said in a croaky voice, “Mommy?”
