Page 73 of Married to the Icy Duke
“We can call off the wedding,” she said quietly. “Charlotte, look at me. If you truly cannot care for this man, if you dislike him so intensely…”
“I don’t dislike him,” Charlotte burst out, a tinge of desperation in her voice. “That’s just it, Thalia. I donotdislike him. In fact, I like him entirely too much. That’s the trouble.”
Thalia blinked up at her, a faint line appearing between her brows. “I don’t understand.”
Charlotte squeezed her eyes shut. “I don’t want Gabriel to know this. Or anybody. Do you understand?”
“I am pleased that you are taking me into your confidence, Charlotte, but if you have serious misgivings about the wedding …”
Charlotte broke away, getting up to pace the room. She felt almost like a caged animal, one that was about to glimpse an opened door.
But this caged animal was quite happy in its cage, and was not at all sure what it might see beyond the open door.
“I expected to dislike him. I was prepared for it. I never sought love, Thalia. I always thought it was a waste of time, and I knew Gabriel agreed with me, once upon a time. Love got our father killed, after all, and brought a usurper into our house.”
Thalia bit her lip. “That time is over, Charlotte. That was a poisonous love. Would you say that your brother and I have brought poison into your home?”
Charlotte squeezed her eyes shut. “No, of course not.”
“Love takes many forms, Charlotte. Now, are you saying that you are in love with the duke of Arkley?”
“No! No, of course not,” Charlotte gasped, feeling suddenly as though the wind had been knocked out of her. “What a ridiculous notion.”
Thalia shrugged. “Is it? You are marrying the man, after all. Everybody wants to fall in love.”
Charlotte clenched her jaw. “Well, not me. It’s a troublesome business. I wanted a marriage of convenience, and so does the duke. Feelings will only get in the way.”
Thalia eyed her shrewdly. “So, you admit that you are experiencing feelings for the duke?”
Color rushed into Charlotte’s face.
“Well, perhaps, but that is not the point.”
“Isn’t it? You cannot pretend that your feelings do not exist. And what about the duke? Is he drawn to you?”
Charlotte hesitated. Memories flooded back to her. She remembered the feel of Isaac’s strong arm around her waist. She could almost feel the brush of his knuckles against the insides of her thighs, and an answering ache in her gut made her flinch, turning away.
“I can never tell with him,” she whispered. “Sometimes I do feel as though I mean something to him, other times I feel … different.”
She swallowed hard, turning pointedly away from her reflection. Thalia was still crouching beside her empty seat, elbow resting on the cushion. Charlotte bit her lip, fighting back a rush of guilt.
I shouldn’t worry her like this.
“It doesn’t matter,” Charlotte continued briskly. “I am getting married, and that’s that. Forgive me, Thalia, and please do forget this conversation. It means nothing.”
Frowning, Thalia rose slowly to her feet.
“I will not forget it, Charlotte. Don’t you understand? I want you to be happy. We all do. If you believe that the duke will make you unhappy…”
“He won’t,” Charlotte answered firmly.Not deliberately, at least.
Thalia did not seem convinced. She took a moment, appearing to collect her thoughts, then took a step forward.
“When I say that he might make you unhappy, I don’t mean in the way a cruel man might make his wife miserable,” Thalia said at last, choosing her words carefully. “I don’t believe that the duke is a cruel man. I am talking about the pain of loving and not being loved in return.”
At that dreadful word,love, Charlotte flinched, turning away.
“Love is out of the question,” she said stoutly. “Please, Thalia, if anything is making me nervous, it’s you, now.”
