Page 50 of Merciless Queen
She looked ashamed at the words she just spoke. “Your body reacts naturally. Just because you had an orgasm doesn’t mean you enjoyed it. It doesn’t make it sex. If you want me to show you, I need you to tell me.”
“Please, make me feel good. I-I need you.”
I nodded, motioning for her to step into my bedroom. Quickly, I texted Malachi and Luca to inform them to handle everything tonight unless it was a dire emergency. I didn’t want Harlow to think I didn’t care about her pleasure. This was an honor if I was being honest with myself, which was also terrifying. I wanted her to feel good, but I knew it could be triggering.
“What were you thinking about when you were touching yourself,bellissima?”
Her cheeks turned three shades darker. “Y-You.”
“Jesus Christ,” I growled. “Is this what you want?”
“Y-Yes. I want to forget the men that hurt me. I want better memories.”
“You do know that I am not going to lay you down and fuck you, right? This is going to be your first time, so I want you to enjoy it.”
She winced. “But it’s not.”
“Yes, it is. Every man who hurt you does not count. Those men are sick, and I will find every last one of them and kill them for touching you. This is going to be real, and it is going to feel good. If it doesn’t, tell me to stop. If you are uncomfortable, I’ll stop. This will be foryourpleasure.”
“W-What if I can’t?”
“Don’t feel ashamed, Harlow. It’ll take time.” She nodded.
She looked at me like she’d never seen me before. I traced the hem of her t-shirt and she tensed, her hand grabbing my wrist, blocking me from taking her shirt off. “I don’t like my body. I’m ugly.”
“Give me your arms.” She gave me her arms, and I lifted her t-shirt up her torso and over her head. She was retreating into herself, so I made my move, leaning forward, and kissed the first scar I saw. It was rigid and circular, like it came from a cigar—too wide to be a cigarette burn. “Harlow, you are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on. And these scars? These are battle wounds. These show that you are a warrior. You are strong and brave. I don’t care about them. In my eyes, you are gorgeous.”
“I—”
I kissed more of her scars before capturing her lips. When I pulled away, she was breathless. “You are a goddess, Harlow. A beautiful, strong goddess. But if you want, Spencer is also a tattoo artist. She can cover your scars.”
She nodded again, and I looped my fingers into her sweatpants, waiting a second, and she gave me a consenting nod. I dragged the material down her long legs and fell to my knees, kissing her thighs. I was not one to get on my knees for anyone, but I'd make an exception for her.
I bit back a moan of eagerness, standing up. I grabbed the hem of my own t-shirt, ripping the fabric from my body in a swift movement and sending it across the room. Harlow’s eyes raked down my body, taking in every part of me. Just like her, I had scars and imperfections. I was proud of my battle scars and impurities. I kept in shape, so I had muscle definition, but I also had my natural curves from my mother that hypnotized men. The mafia was dangerous, and being one of the only few females in a male dominating world meant I had to be a step ahead ofthem or I would fall under them. The last thing I wanted was to be under a man.
The way Harlow was drooling over me was enough to make my ego skyrocket. “You can touch me.”
“H-How?” I smirked, taking her hand and letting her cup my full breasts. “Your skin is soft.”
She leaned forward, kneading my breasts as her lips gently kissed my collarbone. I growled, swiftly grabbing her hips and pushing her against the wall adjacent from my bed. I glanced at her, making sure she was okay before kissing her roughly. I kissed her once at our engagement party, but I didn’t think about it or lose myself in the kiss. But now, this one was real, or as real as I could make it.
She tasted sweet and minty. Her lips were soft, and she fit perfectly with my body as our lips danced together. Harlow thrusted her hips forward, grinding into me, and it took everything within me not to fuck her against this wall and give her the first true orgasm she’d ever had by another’s hand. I was better than that, and she deserved to be treated like royalty with back-to-back orgasms and immense pleasure instead of being a quick fuck.
I ripped my lips from hers and stepped back with a wicked grin across my lips. “Get that pretty ass to the bed, princess.”
CHAPTER 40
Harlow
When I decidedto do this after she left my room, I half expected her to dismiss me and send me packing. Now that I was naked in her bed, I had no idea what I was doing. I knew I wanted her when I thought about her while my hand was between my thighs and she was a repeat in my dreams.
It didn’t matter if she was cold and distant at times. The moments she showed me affection, my heart screamed. But now, we were taking a bigger step into treacherous waters. I never had sex where I enjoyed it, but she slept with many people before me. I wanted this to feel good for the both of us, not just me.
I walked to the bed, and she pushed me onto the soft mattress. “Tonight, I am going to give you all the pleasure that you need. I’m going to use my mouth and fingers. I’m going to taste you and bring you pleasure.”
I nodded, looking at how beautiful she looked. She didn’t look skittish or jumpy like me. She looked confident and ready, like she couldn’t wait to sink her teeth into me.
“If you need me to stop, say so. You don’t need a safe word tonight for what we are doing. If you tell me to stop, I will.”
