Page 65 of Merciless Queen
Mine.
Harlow was mine, and would always be mine.
I picked her up, making sure she was steady on her feet before stepping into the hot bath and sinking low. Harlow stepped in carefully and sat between my legs, resting her head on my chest. I ran my hands up her thighs and she moaned, turning her head and kissing me softly.
“Thank you,” she muttered. “For everything.”
“Why are you thanking me, princess?”
“For everything. For saving me from Vincenzo. For loving me. For showing me that life is more than captivity and misery. I’m happy because of you.”
I kissed her temple. “I’ll do anything for you. If I could have saved you sooner, I would have.”
She sighed. “You know, sometimes I wish things turned out differently, but a part of me knows I never would have met you if this never happened to me. I wonder what my life would be like if my dad never met Vincenzo and if we lived a normal life.”
“I question the same thing. If my mother was alive, my father would still be leading the family, running his businesses and being happy, but I had to grow up just like you after she was murdered.”
“We’ll get him,” she said against my skin.
We will.
Soon.
CHAPTER 51
Harlow
Today was a bad day.I knew every day would be a different battle, but I woke up with a familiar tightness in my chest and a cloud of dread. Maybe things were happening too quickly, or maybe it was the fear that Vincenzo would find me, but I already knew I needed to focus on myself today. I’d come a long way from where I used to be, and I knew what I needed to do to help the mental chains. Healing took time, but today felt like I stumbled back.
I grabbed my paint easel, a canvas, a bag of brushes and assorted paints, and finally the book I started a few nights ago. My boys would be my safety blanket until Caterina got home. She had to do some things at the club and was gone when I woke up. I never realized a person could feel like home, and Caterina was everything I desired. She made me feel like I wasn’t broken beyond repair, and she looked at me like I was the only girl in the world. The love I read about in these books was something I had in life.
Titus and Lucifer greeted me with head nudges until I could get my things on the porch, and then it was kisses. I held Titus and Lucifer and sunk into them. It was like having a part ofCaterina here with me. I kissed Lucifer’s head as I set up my easel before kissing Titus’s head. Part of me wanted to stay in bed today, but I knew that was not what I needed to do. I didn’t want to interact with anyone, so this was the perfect alternative.
The dogs lay next to me, Lucifer’s head in my lap and Titus pressed against my leg as I finished the final touches on this painting. It was them. I never cared for animal paintings, but our boys deserved their own portraits. Titus looked up, turning his head like he was critiquing my painting. I scratched his ear as I scribbled my name at the bottom of it.
I set the painting to the side to allow the paint to dry as I grabbed another blank canvas. This painting would be a floral piece, but I might add women laying in a field of sunflowers. I was trying to find things that were bright and happy to give my brain a hint of serotonin. I messaged Serena to see if we could have an emergency session, but she was away. She said if it was urgent, she could be here tonight, but I didn’t want to disrupt her life. Serena would be here in the morning for a session. Until then, I would paint, read, and enjoy the freedoms I had.
Around two, I walked back to the house to get lunch and a few snacks to bring back with me. I finished my second painting and decided it was time to read. The book I decided to read was an intriguing one with a woman who was married several times, but ultimately ended up falling in love with a woman, and it was Old Hollywood.
I was halfway through the book when Caterina came up the stairs and smiled at me. Lucifer and Titus perked their heads up and wagged their tails. “Hi, my love,” I beamed, laying my book down on my chest.
I bookmarked my page and set my book to the side as Caterina sat on the edge of the loveseat, resting her hand on my shoulder. “I missed you today.” I leaned into her touch. “They said you’ve been out here for hours. Are you okay?”
“I had a bad mental day, but I’m okay.”
“You could have texted me and I would have come home.”
She tapped my leg, and I stood up. Caterina took my spot and pulled me onto her lap, wrapping her arms tightly around me. “I know, but that would involve you having to drop everything to come to me. I don’t want to be a burden.”
“Bellissima, you are never a burden.”
“You were busy, but I made the most of it. Painting helps and I had the boys. I’m meeting Serena tomorrow morning.”
“Okay. Next time, call me and I will come home. You are my wife, and I want to make sure you are okay.”
I kissed her cheek. “How about we cuddle up with the boys and take a nap?”
“You’re speaking my language,bellissima.”
