Page 54 of Alpha Dragon's Mating Contract
“Huh,” Hassel said. Then he looked down at the bluebell patch.
“Wow, it’s sure warm out today,” Walren said desperately, looking at the sky and scratching his neck in the fakest gesture of innocence.
Hassel snorted. “You’ll have to do better than that, Chef Consort. You have to exaggerate a little. Make some puke sounds! Flop over and play dead! Then no one will remember thatall the flowers are missing.”
“Oh gods.” Walren collapsed in a heap next to Zebbie and pulled Raptor’s hoodie over his head, hiding his burning face. “He’s gonna fire me. I didn’t even last a day.”
“Give him a baby, and he won’t,” Hassel said slyly.
Walren shut his mouth and scooped Zebbie up, depositing his son on his back. Then he belly-crawled to a hibiscus bush nearby, depositing Zebbie next to him. When Walren flopped onto his back, he found several huge red flowers staring down at him.
They called to him just as strongly as the bluebells had, and his mouth watered again.
Just one,he told himself.
Before he knew it, there were no more red flowers within arm’s reach.
Hassel stood over him suddenly, clucking his tongue. “Oh, Chef Consort.”
Walren yelped and grabbed Zebbie. “I didn’t touch the flowers!”
“Of course you didn’t,” Hassel sang.
Walren placed Zebbie on his belly and shuffled backward—with some difficulty because he only had one functioning leg when he was lying on the ground. He shuffled further and further from Hassel, until he bumped into something solid.
Raptor almost tripped over him. “Sweetheart!” he yelped.
Several hollow plastic balls rained down on Walren’s head. Zebbie giggled and batted at them. Hassel snickered.
“Sorry!” Walren squeaked. “I was just... trying to get away. From Hassel.”
Raptor pointed at his butler. “Go away!”
Hassel dusted off his hands smugly. “My job here is done. But if you’re serious about the courtship, you should consider sharing some pickup lines!”
Courtship?
Raptor spluttered. Walren looked up at him curiously.
With a cackle, Hassel flounced into the mansion.
“I apologize in advance,” Raptor said hurriedly. “Ignore him.”
“He’s not so bad,” Walren said. He couldn’t help thinking back to Hassel’s words though.
Whatwouldit be like if Raptor tried to court him? Was the nest part of the courtship?
It’s all for the babies,his mind said helpfully.
Walren wasn’t sure what to think of that.
Instead, he turned to see what Raptor had been busy with.
The colorful pool noodles had been strung between two trees, a curtain of tissue paper hanging down from them. The pieces were held together with sticky tape, looking so fragile that a light breeze could rip them apart.
But that wasn’t all that Raptor had done. The dragon had arranged the cans of corn in a ring around the trees, with rubber ducks perched like sentinels on guard towers. Long steel ropes surrounded the ‘nest’, and roses were scattered within the circle. Everything else was piled up around the nest like a haphazard moat.
“The hardwood will go between the corn,” Raptor said helpfully. “It will be a giant woody orgy.”
