Page 50 of A French Affair
‘Had anyone heard from Helena in the meantime?’ Belinda asked.
‘No. Her parents were dead, there were no brothers or sisters.’
‘Right, so Mum and Dad just settled down in the village near my grandmother and lived happily. I mean I had a lovely childhood, they rarely argued, I assumed my parents were happy together. I also assumed, of course, they were married. My parents were known as Mr and Mrs Belrose. Dad’s named on my birth certificate. So what happened thirty-five years ago that made my mother run away?’
‘Helena came back,’ Anouk said simply. ‘And all hell broke loose because…’ Anouk took a deep breath. ‘She told everyone Enzo was still married to her and she wanted him back. And that was the gist of the scandal: Enzo was living as a married man with a woman who wasn’t his wife. The devout churchgoers around here couldn’t accept that easily.’ Anouk looked at Belinda. ‘What was regarded as a scandal then wouldn’t cause such a furore now. Marriages break up and people move on these days with no stigma attached.’
Belinda stood up. ‘I think I’m ready for that drink now.’ She went into the kitchen and fetched the tray Fern had prepared and carried it out to the conservatory. She poured them both a glass of wine and handed one to Anouk and pushed the plate of sandwiches Fern had left for them towards her.
‘So, Mum thought she’d be the laughing stock of the village – or worse,’ Belinda said, finally able to fill in the blanks. ‘And she ran away taking me with her, leaving Dad with Helena. I thought that Dad had had an affair.’ Belinda smothered a sigh. For years she’d blamed her dad’s affair for being the sole reason behind her mum leaving him and ruining their lives. Learning about Helena made it impossible not to feel a degree of sympathy for both her parents. But being secretly married to someone else was far worse than having an affair. Her dad might have been caught up in the middle but he was still guilty of letting her mum and herself down. Wasn’t he?
Belinda helped herself to a sandwich before glancing at Anouk. ‘That’s half the story I had no idea about. Now, can you tell me what happened after we left?’
Anouk looked at her, sympathy clearly etched on her face. ‘Helena moved in with your father, telling people as his wife she had every right to live there. Apparently the fact that Enzo told her he didn’t want her there counted for nothing. She just stayed put. So Enzo himself moved out.’ Anouk took a sip of her wine. ‘Did you never try to contact Enzo without telling your mother?’
‘Of course. I secretly planned to keep in touch with him by letter until I was old enough to come back and join him. I wrote a couple of letters but told him to reply to a friend’s address so that mum wouldn’t know. The last letter I wrote to him was a long one telling him how much I missed and loved him. That letter came back to our normal address, not the one I’d been secretly using. It had been opened and resealed, and marked Gone Away. Return to Sender. Mum saw the French stamp and was livid with me that day,’ Belinda said reflectively. ‘I was miserable and unhappy that Dad was rejecting my… Oh, it was her, wasn’t it, Helena? Not Dad who returned the letter.’
Belinda could feel tears threatening and bit back on the names she wanted to call Helena but wouldn’t in Anouk’s presence.
Anouk gave her a sad smile. ‘I think you could assume that.’
Belinda sat for several moments thinking about things and realised there was another question she needed to ask.
‘He’s still alive, you know.’ Anouk’s quiet voice broke into her thoughts.
‘What?’ Belinda stared at her.
‘I rang a couple of people when Fern told me of your connection to Enzo to try and get some up-to-date information for you. While Helena has lived in the cottage permanently for a number of years, Enzo has been living down on the Morbihan coast. Recently though he moved back into the cottage.’ Anouk hesitated. ‘He’s not well and Helena has taken on the task of nursing him.’
‘Do you know what’s wrong with him?’ Belinda’s voice trembled as she asked the question.
‘No, but there’s talk of moving him to a hospice in the not too distant future.’
Belinda took a drink of wine. This was all too much to take in – the burning question though was, should she go and see him? And importantly did she want to? He’d not been in contact with her for over thirty years so he probably wouldn’t care one way or the other. But maybe seeing him in the flesh again would help her come to terms with the way he’d abandoned her.
Anouk stood up and reached for her stick. ‘Belinda my dear, I do ’ope you’ll forgive me if I go to bed now. The news this evening will have come as a shock to you and I know I’ve given you a lot to think about. But it’s important to remember two things. The past has gone and you can’t change anything about it. It’s the future you need to pay attention to and nurture with a kind heart.’
Belinda stood up and moved across to the old lady to give her a gentle hug. ‘Thank you for talking to me and reaching out to people to find out about my father. I sincerely hope I haven’t tired you out. Can I get you anything before you retire?’
‘No thank you. Fern always makes sure I have water in my bedroom and I have a book. Goodnight and see you again soon, I hope.’
‘I’ll take the supper tray through to the kitchen and close the front door behind me when I leave,’ Belinda said.
Closing the auberge door behind her and reeling from the things Anouk had told her, Belinda pressed the key fob to open the car doors and sank down into the driver’s seat. It was five minutes before she’d pulled herself together sufficiently to drive the short distance to the campsite.
As Belinda parked her car, Alain was coming out of the cottage with BB.
‘Late-night patrol? May I come?’
‘Of course. How did it go this evening? Did Anouk know anything?’ Alain asked when Belinda rejoined him, having grabbed a jacket as well as changing her shoes.
‘Yes. She’d taken the trouble to make some phone calls too. She knew the whole story bang up to date.’
As they walked, Belinda told Alain everything Anouk had told her, including the fact that her dad was still alive, if very ill.
‘The thing I can’t get my head around though is, did he ever tell Mum about Helena and the fact he was married? And did she convince herself she didn’t want to get married because there was no chance of it happening. Or did the two of them decide together that they didn’t need a marriage certificate? Mum always said they were a couple of hippies.’ Belinda stopped. ‘Actually, I don’t think she did know. I still remember the way she flipped the day she dragged me away. Totally out of character for her.’ Belinda shook her head. ‘So much I don’t understand and probably never will now.’
She stopped walking suddenly and turned to face Alain.
