Page 39 of Like Home
Despite the circumstances, I can’t help but tease, “Old man.” The corner of his mouth ticks up and he gives me a gentle push towards the waiting nurse. I hoist Emma higher on my chest and walk towards the nurse.
“You’re her mom?” she asks. When I nod to confirm, she leads me down a brightly lit, sterile hallway. The walls are painted a seafoam green and our shoes squeak on the gleaming, white tile. Her brisk pace has me scrambling to keep up, especially with Emma acting as a dead weight.
I follow her into a room labeled “triage” where she directs meto lay Emma down on the bed. She efficiently takes her vitals, all the while asking me questions about her symptoms.
When she pushes down on Emma’s right side, Emma bucks and lets out a loud yelp of pain. She starts crying and reaches out for me, eyes wide.
“I’m so sorry sweetie. I had to do that as part of our tests to see what’s going on.” The nurse looks at me, her mouth pressed into a worried line. “We’re going to get her admitted. I’ll be back shortly with a gown and the doctor should be in after to talk to you.” At my nod, she exits the room through an interior door that leads to what looks like a nurse’s station. When she gets back, the nurse and I work together to get Emma changed into the light-blue hospital gown and under the starched covers.
I know Emma isn’t doing well when she hardly flinches as the nurse gets an IV going after we’ve been moved to a room for admitted patients. She normally throws a huge fit if she has to get poked. She just turns her head away while the nurse gets a few vials of blood and clutches my arm with her free hand.
The next little bit passes in a blur, and suddenly they’re wheeling Emma away for a CT scan. I’m left alone in the small, beige room tapping my foot anxiously, repeatedly locking and unlocking my phone, and watching the minutes tick by at a snail’s pace. When Emma was here, it was easy to be distracted from my own anxious thoughts because I was so focused on making sure she was okay. I might drive myself insane. After checking that Jared hasn’t called for the umpteenth time, I leave him another message letting him know Emma is getting some tests done. Even though he probably won’t get the messages until later, I want to keep him up-to-date.
They wheel her back into the room and let me know the doctor should be in shortly to discuss the test results. Once we’re alone again I ask, “How are you doing, sweet girl?” I brush her hair back from her sweaty face. Luckily they gave her somethingfor the vomiting, so she hasn’t been sick since before they took her back for the CT scan.
“It still really hurts,” she whispers.
“I’m sorry, baby. Hopefully, they’ll be able to help with the pain soon.” I squeeze her hand and start humming the lullaby I used to sing her as a baby. It always calms her, even still.
“I’m scared, Mama,” she whispers. My heart nearly shatters and I hold her hand tighter.
I say, “I know, Em. Going to the hospital can be scary. Just know that they’ll take good care of you. You’ll feel better soon.” She nods and goes back to closing her eyes.
A young doctor enters the room after a quick knock on the door. “Hi, Emma and Mom. I hear you aren’t feeling so great today. I’m Dr. Miller.” She briskly washes her hands before pulling up the rolling chair next to the hospital bed. Emma shakes her head minutely. “I’m sorry to hear that. The good news is that we should be able to get you fixed up today and you’ll be on your way to feeling better soon. How does that sound?” She leans toward Emma and gives her arm a small squeeze.
“Good,” Emma states in a small voice, doing her best to muster up a smile.
The doctor grins brilliantly in response. “Great! Okay, Mom let me go over these results with you and our plan of action.” She wheels towards the large computer monitor, enters her credentials, and pulls up a scan. She points to a blob amongst the other grayish blobs and says, “This is Emma’s appendix. It’s pretty inflamed and is the source of the pain. Considering her fever and the level of inflammation, I’m recommending we remove it today, as soon as our general surgeon, Dr. Watkins, is available.”
My heart sinks. I knew it was a possibility, but it’s awful to have it confirmed. “Okay. If you think that’s the best course of action. I just want my daughter to get better.”
“I understand completely. Dr. Watkins should be ready to take her back within the hour. I’ll have my nurse bring you therelevant paperwork to sign in the meantime. I’ll also order some pain medicine to make Emma more comfortable until they can take her back.”
Dr. Miller stands to wash her hands again before giving me a reassuring smile. She says, “Don’t worry, this is a very routine surgery and once she wakes up, she’ll be a little sore, but feeling better than she is right now. She’ll be back to herself in no time.” I say my thanks and then go back to humming Emma’s lullaby and stroking her hair.
CHAPTER 26
Summer
Ryan and I sit in the surgery center waiting room. The medical team just took Emma back and said it wouldn’t be long before she was out of surgery. I can’t stop the anxious bounce of my knee, or the way I keep glancing toward the double doors where the nurse will come out to update us.
“She’s going to be just fine. I know it has to be scary, but at least they’re confident they caught the appendicitis before it got more serious. My little cousin had the same surgery years ago. She was up and running around pretty quickly. Emma will be back to normal before you know it,” Ryan says, rubbing his hand up and down my arm in slow, soothing motions.
“I know she’s going to be okay. It just sucks that she has to go through this and that there’s nothing I can do for her to make it better,” I say, tears making my voice low and strained. Being a mother means having your literal heart walking around outside your chest. Knowing there is nothing I can do to take this away for her is the closest thing to torture I’ve ever endured.
“You already did everything you could by rushing to bring her here. Now you just have to get together some of her favoritethings so she has something to do while she’s recovering. Maybe you can put your mind to that?” he suggests. I nod, sniffling. I decide to take his suggestion to heart and create a list on my phone of some things she enjoys that she can do lying down. I order a few new toys and books for her online and take the time to update Rachel on Emma. I feel mildly better after being productive in the only way I can be right now.
A nurse wearing dark-blue scrubs comes into the room and approaches us. She pulls her mask down with a smile and says, “Hi, are you the parents of Emma Forrester?”
“Yes, what’s going on?” I say, not bothering to correct her assumption that Ryan is Emma’s dad. There are more important things happening.
“Don’t worry, the surgery is going great. Dr. Watkins is almost done removing her appendix now. He just wanted me to come out and give you an update. He said that it’s a good thing you brought her in when you did because it looked even more inflamed than the scans showed, and it had a good chance of bursting. That causes much more serious complications. Like I said, you guys did the right thing bringing her in. He’ll be done with the surgery soon. I’ll come out to update you again when she’s headed into recovery. You should be able to see her shortly after that.”
I rush out a breath and say, “Thank you.”
“Of course! I know this is Emma’s first surgery, and that’s always nerve-wracking for the parents. Honestly, it’s harder on you guys than her. She’s taking a nice little nap while mom and dad are out here worrying.” She gives me a reassuring smile. “Any questions you want me to pass along, Mom? Dad?”
Just as Ryan is opening his mouth to, I’m sure, clarify the mixup, I hear Jared’s angry voice before I see him. “Dad?! Who the fuck do you think you are?” His wild-eyed expression quickly morphs from fear to fury as he levels Ryan with a hard stare.
