Page 18 of Only Yours
I’ll call you soon, sweetheart. And I’ll write you as often as I can. I’m holding on here, holding on for the day when I get that next kiss.
Yours,
Brian
Chapter 18
Friendship has always sustained me, even when the ties with my family threatened to suffocate me. -Reina
Reina
“What do you think?” I ask, full of anxiety. “He’s just too good to be true, right?” I chew on my thumbnail and pace in front of Amit. I emit a small, fake laugh. “I mean, he’s got to be full of bullshit. He can’t really like me this much?” My voice wavers on that last question. I really, really want him to like me that much, but if something can go wrong in my life, it usually does.
Amit watches me with an inscrutable expression. I just finished reading him a snippet of Brian’s last letter to me. Obviously, not the dirty parts, or the parts that I just wanted to keep to myself. So, a few lines really.
Amit shifts on my bed and then pulls his knees up to his chest. “Say that one line again? The line about not being able to get you out of his head.” He sighs. “That line is so swoony.”
“Swoony?” I snort and chuck a pillow at him. “You’ve been watching romance movies too much again.”
He sends me a devilish grin. “True, but it is a swoony line.”
I start pacing again. “Again, you’re not helping here, friend. I need advice, friend. I need you to tell me I’ve lost my mind andI should cease writing this guy and just face the future that is already planned out for me.”
He rocks back against my dorm room wall. “Nope,” he pops the p, “I don’t think I will tell you that.”
“Shit, I just hit the quick of my nail!” I look around for something else to throw at Amit. “Can you please tell me what you do think then? Something besides, oh that’s a swoony line?”
He props his chin on his knees and gives me a cheeky grin. “I’ve told you before and I’ll tell you again, that’s a nasty habit.” He cocks his head to the side. “I’ve never seen you like this. My friend Reina, always so sure of herself, so ready to call love a joke, is falling for someone. I never thought I would see the day.”
I sit down abruptly on the bed and send him a sharp glance. “I’m not falling for anyone.” I shove a hand through my hair and then bring my thumb to my lips again. I curse when I realize I can’t chew on it anymore. “I just like him. I mean, he’s a nice guy and he’s handsome. And he’s got a way with words.”
He chuckles. “You are so far gone, and you don’t even know it.”
This time, I throw a sweater that’s laying on the bed at him. “You’re no help.”
He finally scoots over and sits next to me on the bed, unfolding his long legs one at a time.
He takes my hand in his own. “Look at me, Reina Anderson.”
I turn to stare at my oldest friend in the world. Amit and I have been inseparable since we were five. We know the good, the bad, and the ugly about each other. I’m sure he didn’t expect to spend the weekend he’s visiting from Emory giving me love advice, but that’s what he’s here doing. And I know I can count on him to give it to me straight.
“Reina, that boy is falling for you, and you’re falling for him. And that’s okay. It’s okay to trust someone sometimes. It’s okay to let him in a little. You’re an amazing person, and he deservesto get to know that person. It’s time to let someone besides just me in so they can see the real Reina, the one I’m proud to call my best friend.”
His dark eyes search mine for some sign that his words are penetrating my shell. I sigh deeply and squeeze his hand.
“What if he turns out to be an asshole like Kyle? What if he betrays my trust or cheats on me or turns out to be bigoted or something gross like that?” I voice all my fears at once, letting the words roll over each other. I don’t want Brian to be any of that. I want him to be exactly who he has been in his letters. But I’m scared he won’t be.
Amit places a finger to my lips. “Then you’ll find out those things.” He shrugs. “And maybe you’ll get your heart broken. Is that the worst thing in the world? At least you’ll be feeling something. I would give anything to know what it’s like to fall in love.”
This time, I grab his hand. My heart breaks for my best friend. He deserves love. He deserves it more than anyone I know. “You’ll find it, Amit. I know you will.”
His full lips curve up into a grin. “Then how ‘bout you play this out with this guy? Give him a chance for both of us. Let me live vicariously, please.” He leans against me and presses his palms together. “Pretty, pretty please?”
I scrunch up my nose. “I guess I can do it for you, crazy.” I grab another pillow and hit him over the top of the head with it. “But don’t expect too many details. Some things are not for your innocent ears.”
He groans. “Damn, I was hoping to get all the intel.”
I giggle. He’s the one of the only people that I can be myself with and laugh with. I love him so much.
