Page 39 of Only Yours
“Yes, I do, sir. Her name’s Reina,” I reply. I try not to seem like a smug bastard and grin when I say her name, but it’s hard.
Captain Franks gives a dry chuckle. “I was in love once too, Richards. Okay to talk about it and be happy about it.” He kicks at the dirt and then sighs. “Just realize this life is hard on a family, son. It’s not an easy one. Even the best women can’t handle it sometimes.”
I open my mouth to tell him that my Reina could handle it, or maybe his wife is a bitch, or something else comforting, but snap it closed. The truth is I don’t know what would happen if I chose to stay in this life. Something inside me changed when I fell for Reina. Special Ops is no longer my dream. Being with her is.
“Thanks for the advice, sir,” I say instead.
“At least I’ve got my girls,” he mutters under his breath and hangs his head. “My two girls are everything to me. If you’relucky enough to have kids, Richards, make sure they know how important they are to you. Because you never know what life will bring you next, or what could happen tomorrow.”
I nod. “Yes, sir,” I respond.
“Well, that’s enough of you talking to this moody old man. Go about your business Sergeant Richards. I’ll see you in the morning.”
I salute him and he salutes me back. As I walk away, I shake my head. Life is so damn unpredictable. That could be me in twenty years. I have no way of knowing what the future will bring.
Chapter 36
The moments when life changes with just one phone call. -Reina
Reina
Watching Sophie and Liam flirt in the library is like watching a really cute romcom when you’re just in the mood to watch a horror movie. Every time they touch, I feel a little envious. I love them both, but it’s been two months since Brian left, and phone calls and letters pale in comparison to his actual touch. I feel antsy. I’m also a week away from spring break and telling my mom I don’t want to continue the pre-med track.
“Baby girl, you should really stay on the other side of the table. You’re makin’ it hard to concentrate.” Liam’s deep voice rumbles into Sophie’s ear. Apparently, I’m not supposed to hear him, but he’s shit at whispering, so I hear everything.
“Then I would just play footsie under the table with you,” Sophie replies under her breath. She also is not a great whisperer.
Gag me with a spoon.Are Brian and I like this when we’re together? I glance over at Sophie and Liam making googoo eyes at each other. Shit, we probably are that bad.
Sophie’s phone starts vibrating and she picks it up. “I wonder why Mom is calling me. She’s supposed to be at work tonight.”
Someone behind us whispers shhh. I turn to give them a dirty look. I can get pissed at my best friend, but douchebags in the library shouldn’t.
“Mom?” she whispers, “What’s up? I’m in the library, studying for a test tomorrow.”
Sophie bites her lower lip and glances around her. “Yes, they’re here. What’s up?”
Her face suddenly goes pale, and she reaches for Liam’s hand. He squeezes it and whispers, “What? Where? Mama, I’m coming.” A small sob comes out and she covers her mouth. “Liam, talk to my mom.” She hands him the phone and then looks at me. Something in my heart squeezes.
“Brian?” I ask, my voice shaking. “Please, God, tell me it’s not Brian.”
The tears are running down her face at a rapid pace now. She crosses to my side of the table and kneels. “There was an explosion, Reina. IED. He was out on a convoy. He’s alive,” she gulps and takes a deep breath, “he’s alive, but that’s all we know.”
My chair topples over backward as I stand up abruptly. Now, I need to get to him now. I run out the double doors of the library, hearing Sophie sob behind me. I need air. Got to breathe now. My thoughts are scattered, and nothing makes sense. I knock into someone, and I hear them curse at me. I don’t give a damn. All I can see is Brian. Brian, who is always so good to me, and always so happy. Who takes care of his mom and sister and never complains. Who loves me completely for who I am.
I run until I reach my bench, the bench where I’ve read all his letters. I kneel beside it. I can’t stand to sit in the exact place where I’ve sat tracing the words of each of his letters over and over again.
I bury my head in my hands, and sob. Then I stand up and stumble with my hands over my mouth. I promptly throw up in the nearest bush.
The next few days are a blur. If you told me I didn’t speak the entire time, I would probably believe you. Hell, if you told me I stood in the middle of Times Square naked the whole time I would believe that too.
I do know I learn a lot about government procedure over the next week. The trickle of information is slow as we learn the extent of Brian’s injuries. His commander died, two of the other men are severely injured, and one survived with barely a scrape. From what everyone has said, Brian is somewhere in between.
The blast hit him on the right side and that’s where most of his injuries are. I might not be able to talk much, but in those first few days I listen a lot. Liam holds all of us together. Brian’s mom, Sophie, and I take turns comforting each other, but it’s really Liam who communicates with everyone. Brian’s mom understands more since she’s a nurse, but she has times when she keeps mumbling, my baby, my baby, under her breath and can’t quite seem to keep it together. I suppose no matter how professional you are at work, having your child injured is a different story altogether.
After a week, he’s finally transported closer to home. We’re lucky in the fact that there’s a large Army hospital in Savannah so we don’t have to go far to see him.
I feel completely and totally frozen by fear standing outside of his hospital room that first time. I’ve imagined all kinds of scenarios. Him sitting up and being fine, which is not going to happen. Him hooked up to wires and tubes, which is likely to happen. Every image has played in my head, night after night as I’ve tried to sleep. The truth is, I just want to see him whole. But I’m scared to death that he won’t be the Brian I remember and hell, that he won’t remember his love for me.
