Page 39 of Pumpkin
Pumpkin thought of SJ, back at the clubhouse with all his cousins.Families. He’d come from a broken home, raised by a single mother after his selfish father had abandoned them. As a preteen and then a teen—once he’d learned how babies were made and puberty had hit—Pumpkin had sworn to himself that he’d never have kids outside of wedlock. That he’d love his children’s mother with everything he had and everything he was. That he’d be to her and their children everything that his father had never been to him.
How the fuck did he have two kids out of wedlock? By two different women! He’d forgo the ‘wedlock’ bit if he was in a committed relationship with the same woman and she’d gotten pregnant. They’d still be a family, ring or no.
Cheryl had been a step above a sex worker. He didn’t like the word ‘prostitute’ and calling her a ‘whore’ was beyond degrading. He’d never disrespect her so, even after what she’d tried to do to Cage. Most of his brothers had been with Cheryl and the other Honeys. There were a few exceptions. Steel was happily married and had never touched the Honeys. Angel was a heterosexual woman and what the Honeys had to offer had never appealed to her. Jumper’s severe PTSD had kept him from being involved with any woman for fear of hurting her until he’d met Jasmine and they’d worked through that fear together. And Scar was… Well, Scar was Scar. Pumpkin was sure Tally was the only woman on the planet who could have gotten through to Scar.
Hell, even Lucky had been with a Honey a time or two when the loneliness of being a single dad of two had gotten to him.
Lucky’s story, though, was far different than Pumpkin’s, and it was humorlessly ridiculous to even attempt to compare them. Lucky had raised his two much-younger siblings as his own. He’d fought to ensure that they didn’t end up in foster care. And while, yes, prior to meeting Harper, Lucky had been a single father too, Pumpkin felt their situations were entirely different. Lucky’s was that of love and sacrifice whereas Pumpkin’s seemed to be a repeat episode of when Ross and Rachel discovered that condoms are only effective ninety-seven percent of the time.
Somehow he’d just hit that rare three percent twice. Twice!
But the worst of it? The absolute worst? Pumpkin’s eyes squeezed together in shame as he recalled Dosia’s look of fear. Fear ofhim. It was the one thing that was rivaling his anger at the moment.
At least he’d gotten out of there. As much as he wanted to stay, to get to know his daughter, he knew he couldn’t. He was not in the right mindset, and frankly, neither was Dosia.
Dosia. Holy fuck! What the fuck was he supposed to do abouther? She’d lied to him. She’d kepta childfrom him! For six fucking years!
It wasn’t like they met in some random city and neither of them knew the other’s name. Her family was from Mount Grove. He didn’t know if she’d grown up here too, but she knew Mount Grove, and she knew about the club. Hell, they’d had sex half a football field away from his clubhouse apartment.
She knew where to find him. And she hadn’t.
The cage braking had Pumpkin opening his eyes. They were outside the dealership. Darrin had pulled right up to the sidewalk outside the large, glass front doors. The fifty-six thousand square-foot building was half storage and retail space and half service department. When the club had bought the business, they’d devised a work schedule so each of the patched members had rotating shifts on the sales floor. Some had more than others because they’d discovered they’d enjoyed the work. Others, like Scar and Jumper, rarely took a shift.
But their best salesman was Scotty. The goofy teenlovedwearing his denim kid’s cut and coming to work with his daddy. He especially helped to calm some of the women who were still on the fence about their husbands buying a motorcycle.
The teen was known to tell customers,“Just tell him to drive slow, like my daddy. He drives like an old granny!”
Pumpkin had liked working the floor, but he didn’t excel at it like some of the others. As a mechanic, Grumpy was very knowledgeable and was often called upon for the more hardcore enthusiasts. It was hilarious watching Angel work the floor, especially when they had a real ‘manly man’ customer who tried to throw his weight around orhad inaccurate information. Watching said customer try to mansplain to Angel would never get old.
Pumpkin hadn’t been back to the dealership since his accident. When SJ had first been born, he would work his shifts with a baby carrier strapped to his chest. Some of the women who had accompanied their men into the shop had even slipped him their number. Something about a man and a baby was irresistible, but all those numbers had ended up in the trash.
Pumpkin hadn’t had sex since the day he’d discovered Cheryl was pregnant with his baby. It hadn’t been a conscious act. Like, he was trying to make a statement about sex being bad or something. There had just been so much to do to get ready for SJ, so much for him to learn, that sex had literally been the last thing on his mind. Then, after SJ had been born, he’d been too exhausted. There’d been days when he truly didn’t think he was going to make it. He had no idea what he was doing and he hated constantly having to ask for help… It just wasn’t him. He was so used to doing everything himself, to stand on his own two feet.
And then, the accident happened.
Darrin cleared his throat. “Are, uh, are you going in?”
They’d just been idling out front for who knew how long.
Pumpkin didn’t actually feel like getting out. No, what he wanted was to go for a ride. To hop on a hog and ride. For hours. To get lost to the road and the wind for a while. He missed it so much that it was like a part of him had been amputated when his bike had been destroyed.
Pumpkin pulled the door handle. His back twitched uncomfortably, but he ignored it. He swung his legs like he’d been trained to, putting both boots flat on the sidewalk before bracing himself on the door to stand.
His knees buckled, and Pumpkin nearly went down.
“Shit!” came from behind him before he heard scrambling.
Pumpkin bared his teeth, trying his damnedest to remain on his feet. It was sheer arm strength holding him up until Darrin got to him and guided him back onto the passenger seat.
“I’ll get your walker—” Darrin started to say but Pumpkin snapped.
“I don’t need my fucking walker!” He just needed his goddamn legs to fucking work! What good was he to either his son or his daughter if he couldn’t fuckingwalk!
Darrin ignored him and hurried to the trunk. Pumpkin glared daggers at the man as he brought the foldable walker forward.
“I will murder you in your sleep if you bring that thing near me.”
Darrin kept on walking. “I’ll risk it.” He opened the metal walker and placed it in front of Pumpkin.
