Page 50 of Spy With Me
Zach sighed. “Is there any way you could do it? You knowtraining a person can get…personal.”
Arthur smiled. “Yes, that would be the point, son. Train herand you’ll wind up using that bed for something other than sleeping, and thenall the awful sexual tension will be gone.”
Zach heard himself growl. “I’m trying to avoid that.”
“Why?”
A light rain began. That felt right. He was stuck in a muddyfield with traumatized goats and a somewhat caustic veterinarian. His brotherhad gotten married, and he’d spent that time eating butterbeans, watching Britswin shockingly low amounts of money by answering trivia questions and rollingbocce balls, and trying to keep a kitten from killing itself. “Because I’m notgoing to hurt her again.”
“So it’s not because she isn’t the other woman?”
Now Zach’s growl was fully focused. “I am not in love withTasha Taggart.”
“But you are in love with Devi Taggart,” Arthur pointed out,checking the goat’s hooves.
“She doesn’t believe me.” And he was pretty sure she neverwould. He was almost certain she would accept a sexual relationship with him,but that was all it would be. Sex.
“Do you think not having sex with her is helping your case?”
“I don’t want this to be a case. I want it to be arelationship.” He wanted to be fucking normal. He wanted to be back in Dallasgetting ready to go out with her, to go to the club with his sub and sit withhis friends and not think about anything except how he was going to torture hersweet ass and who would go out with them for late-night waffles this week.
He wanted a future with her.
“You know I’m married, right? I lied to my wife about someof the more dangerous portions of my job.” Arthur seemed to be focused on hispatient, but every word was carefully chosen.
“Being that your job at one point was intelligence, that’sunderstandable.”
“And yet you’ve told Devi almost everything,” Arthur pointedout.
“I didn’t in the beginning, and you know why. I walked intothat team thinking they were undisciplined and would fuck up everything andended up being just like them. They talk more than they should, but they trustthe people around them. Even the non-military friends and family are willing tohelp with anything they ask for. I’ve never known that kind of loyalty. Butit’s expected that we keep our loved ones out of the loop. It’s what theysigned up for.”
“Well, she didn’t, and she would argue with you about that.We almost broke up. And then my saint of a wife decided that what she neededwas time. She couldn’t forgive me, but she also couldn’t stay away. Time is onyour side. Even if you don’t have a lot of it. For my wife and I it took thebetter part of a year, but I won back her trust. I did not do it by acting likeher friend. Devi seems to be willing to have relations with you, to pretendthings are normal. A funny thing happens when you pretend things are normal.They tend to become normal.”
He stood there in the mist, Arthur’s words penetrating hisbrain. “You think if I take her to bed and be a good boyfriend, she’ll starttreating me like a boyfriend?”
Arthur shook his head. “I think you should take her to bedand start treating her like a good husband, a great partner. Show her you trusther. Talk to her about what you can. You aren’t beholden to the Agency when itcomes to this.”
“Oh, I assure you they will hold me responsible.”
“Perhaps, but you can be open with Devi because you’re notan operative for them anymore,” Arthur pointed out. “You’re on your own and getto choose your team. I think she would be a good team member if you let her.”
“Isn’t that putting her in danger? Shouldn’t I protect her?”
Arthur looked up and winced. “Don’t ask Lacey thosequestions. Seriously, it will get rough. You should protect her, but youshouldn’t coddle her. She’s not some child to lock away from the big bad world.Besides, she seems to find trouble.”
He huffed. “Yeah, I get your point. But what if the Agencyholds her responsible, too? I’m obviously more afraid of her in Huisman’shands, but I don’t like the thought of certain elements of the Agency gettinghold of her either.”
“That’s a chance she should be allowed to take. A choice shemakes for herself.”
“I’m not going to get to marry her. Or even to have a coupleof years with her.” He heard the sorrow in his words.
“Pessimist. You don’t know that. I’m sure in your head thisall ends poorly, but you know some powerful people, and they can move mountainswhen they want to. Besides, have you considered the fact that if you’re the oneto bring Huisman in, the Agency can use that to protect their own image?”
He had not. It was a long shot. But it was a shot. “Theywon’t want to admit I tricked them. They could say they sent me out and thenthey look smart.”
Arthur stood and pointed his way. “Exactly. If you don’tthink Ian Taggart hasn’t already considered that exact scenario, then you don’tknow him well. Look, there’s real chatter about something going down soon.”
He nodded. “I think that’s why my mom contacted me.”
