Page 7 of Spy With Me
Bri huffed. “Come on. You know how you would feel if Natehad looked at you and been likesure, you’ll do. She’s crazy aboutZach.”
“I don’t know that I would say crazy.” Except she kind ofwas. It had been lust at first sight, but she didn’t want to be the kid sisterwho pined for her brother’s friend. Although it wasn’t like they were close. TJhadn’t been working on the team for long, and he spent most of his free timewith a hot dog in one hand and Lou’s boobs in the other. They really should bemore circumspect. Uncle Ian might deserve to walk in on them doing it in aconference room, but she’d been a good sister, damn it.
Daisy stood, brushing back her dark hair and pacing asthough thinking through the problem. “You have talked about that man since theday he walked into this club. You practically drool when he’s around. I don’tget why you would say anything except Sir, yes, Sir. And Nate kind of did. Hedidn’t even know it was me. If he’d known it was me, he would have run theother way, so I don’t get why Devi doesn’t want to shoot her shot. I mean atleast you would know. And if it doesn’t work, you got some hot sex out of it.I’ve heard rumors. He’s kind of hard core. Is that what you’re afraid of?”
Zach wasn’t a big player, but he had spent some time withseveral of the subs here at the club. Usually outside of his friend group. He’dplayed with a couple of the subs Gabriel Lodge had brought in, and some of thehostesses/servers from the restaurant group. They had seemed deeply satisfiedwith his services.
She didn’t want to be serviced.
Except that was exactly what she’d been planning for theevening. She’d planned to do what he did—go outside her friend group, pick aDom, ride him to some sweet stress relief.
“I’m not worried that he’s hard core. I like it rough,” sheadmitted. She was known as one of The Hideouts hard bottoms. It took a lot tomake her cry.
SomeDomsliked a challenge.
“Then why?” Daisy’s head shook. “Okay. I know why. You’rebeing cautious. It was okay for the sex to be casual if you didn’t care aboutthe guy.”
“Yes.” Bri nodded vigorously as though happy Daisy hadgotten it right. “She’s half in love with him.”
She wouldn’t say that. “I don’t know I would use the wordloveyet.”
Daisy pointed Devi’s way. “That’s my point, friend. You’vespent so little time with him that the guy you like is mostly in your head.You’re not in love with him. You’re infatuated with the idea of him. He’s got apretty package and seems nice and smart, and you like how he tops a sub. Thatdoesn’t mean you know him. It doesn’t mean you would even like him if you spenttime with him, but how will you ever know if you don’t spend time with him?”
Bri frowned. “I don’t like it when she’s all logical. Iprefer my Daisy talking about soul mates and true love.”
Daisy took Bri’s hand. “But how can you find either if youdon’t try? I know what I felt for Nate as a kid was a crush. Believe it or notI only intended to spend one night with him. One night to get him out of mysystem.”
“And now you’re engaged.” It was how things went with Daisy.She could walk into a perfectly normal situation and it would upend almostimmediately. In this case it led to assassins and being stuck at Sanctum fordays, but also with her being engaged to Nathan Carter, who did turn out to bethe love of her life.
Had she walked away from her chance to do the same?
“Yup, because when the opportunity presented itself, I wasopen to it.” Daisy sat back down, looking at Devi with a serious expression onher usually sunny face. “The whole love thing is not for the faint of heart. Itdoesn’t simply happen. We make it happen. Or at least we open ourselves up tothe possibility. We don’t run away from it. Even when you know it can breakyour heart. You know what our Aunt Grace says.”
“It’s better to have a broken heart than an empty one,” Brisaid quietly. “It’s easier on paper. I watch my brother. I love him so much,but he’s screwing up with the two people he’s loved since he was a child. Ikeep thinking if those three can’t make it, no one can.”
“But they will,” Daisy vowed. “This is a bump in the road.You have that attitude because we’re in one of the hard parts. Note I said one.I’m not so unrealistic that I think it’s easy going from here out, but thebeginning is hard. It’s normal to want to protect yourself when you seeheartache all around you. When you see how the people you love long forsomething they think they can’t have. When you watch them screw up again andagain and there’s nothing you can do about it. My brother is at fault, too. Sois Carys. They’ve all made mistakes, but they’re finally confronting them now.It’s a good thing. It’s why I think Devi should confront what’s really buggingher.”
“I thought it was Zach,” Devi said. “I mean I’ve got a lotgoing on right…” Damn it. She figured it out. Daisy had been studying way toomuch. She was going back to college to get certified to work with kids onmental health. “It’s not because I didn’t get the jobs I wanted.”
Bri sent Daisy a look. Like they’d talked about this andcame up with a plan to handle it. To handle her.
“Fine.” She sat back with a sigh. It looked like her hotevening was going to turn into a girl-talk session. “My deep desire to getrailed by a hot and forgettable Dom tonight does have something to do with thejob hunt. Dais, I know you’ve run through a lot of jobs and it’s got to hurtwhen you get fired…”
Daisy held a hand up. “It does, but I’m not putting my soulinto what is essentially art and having it judged by everyone. I know, sweetie.It’s why Bri won’t let anyone but us read her incredible novels.”
“They’re just not ready,” Bri argued.
What wasn’t ready was Bri, and that was okay. She needed totake her time and learn her craft. She could do that because she was a writer.Devi wanted to do the same, but designing clothes wasn’t a solitary job. Notthe way she wanted to do it. “You’ll know when they’re ready. But I’mdefinitely letting the rejections get in my head. I thought I was feelingconfident. I walked out that door feeling hot and sexy, and then Zach waslooking at me and all I could think about was the fact that I designed this corsetand the shorts, and they called my work pedestrian and unflattering and worstof all, safe.”
Daisy and Bri both winced.
Safety wasn’t a bad thing, but none of her friends wanted tobe safe when it came to the things they were passionate about. They came fromfamilies of spies and military operatives and bestselling authors, andextremely fierce people. Being calledsafehurt worst of all.
“You are not safe,” Daisy said. “You make some of thecoolestfetwear I’ve ever seen. I would bet youdidn’t send them those designs in your portfolios.”
Devi sighed. “Fetwear isn’texactly what these companies make. But I do get your point. I might have playedit safer than I should have.”
“You still have so many applications out there,” Bri saidencouragingly. “You’ll find the right place. I just wish it was here inDallas.”
